Essence
by Love.Live.Sing
Summary: As if falling in love with a girl wasn't hard enough, falling in love with a whore just had to be harder. Ichi/Ruki.
1. Damn Wednesdays

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A/N: So this is my first Bleach story. I hope you all like it as much as I do. If you would please R&R that would be great. Especially review cause that makes me want to continue writing. Um...can't think of anything else to say really but that I hope you enjoy it. So have fun reading. ^^

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. If I did, there would be no room in my closet for clothes...**

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Chapter One: Damn Wednesdays

Kurosaki Ichigo sighed before crossing his arms over his chest as his ears searched for a noise, any noise that would indicate that something was wrong. In a way, he wished something _was_ wrong, that way maybe this boring job wouldn't be so, well, boring. Sometimes he really hated his job, only because it was long, tiresome, and most of the time, uneventful. And it was only on nights like this that he itched for a fight, and never seemed to get one. Sighing irritably, he opened his eyes, blinking a couple of times so his poor retinas could adjust to the abhorrent strobe lighting that was Urahara Kisuke's oblique obsession. His signature scowl was visible as he crossed his arms over his chest and surveyed the large room. Not many customers were here today, he mentally noted. Usually _Essence_ was more crowded; usually they were at maximum capacity, but not tonight. Damn Wednesday's, they were always such a pain in the ass.

He scanned the miniscule group of customers, which were scattered among the tables facing the stage. Sighing again, he took note of the regulars, and of the newcomers. Warily he glanced around for Uryu, who would surely be writing notes down and surveying background checks of the said newcomers. After finding Uryu, his eyes returned to the large room that served as the main room for business. He was standing next to the front door, the stage to his right, the arcade/casino to his left, the full bar was across the room, taking up the entire wall, and tables were strewn all over the central floor. Those annoying strobe lights flashed as his eyes landed on the girl grinding up against the pole on stage. Yeah, he said pole.

He wasn't afraid to admit it. Fact was; Kurosaki Ichigo worked as a bouncer at a strip club. Well, technically the strip club was nothing but a façade. The real work took place behind the doors located after the bar, where a central office sat, and beyond that room, countless bedrooms. Yes, bedrooms. Correction: Kurosaki Ichigo worked as a bouncer at a strip club/illegal whorehouse. Mind you, its not like he wanted to work there, when his dad finally admitted what kind of business he actually _managed_…well you can only imagine how much it shocked Ichigo.

His father worked for a strip club/whorehouse, and not just any strip club/whorehouse. No, he had to work for _Essence_, the most popular strip club in Tokyo, Japan. At first Ichigo tried to ignore the whole house business, but after being caught taking down a couple of its bouncers, with only his fists, by Soifon, he was recruited against his will. Because of that he was forced into the house, well that and the fact that if _he_ didn't join the group, one of his sisters would've had to, and there was no way in hell Ichigo would let one of his sisters become a stripper, or worse. When he first joined in, he couldn't believe the intricacy of the house. The owner was an old, horny, perverted geezer (figures), by the name of Yamamoto. Under Yamamoto, there were twelve separate divisions, each reigning over a certain part of the house.

For example, the Second Division, otherwise known as the Stealth Force, and led by Soifon, was in charge of keeping the house safe and out of police detection. Each division had unique yet related jobs, each essential to the house and its employees. He along with, Yasutora Sado or Chad, Kensei Muguruma, Ikkaku Madarame, Tatsuki Arisawa, and Grimmjow Jaegarjaquez made up the Eleventh Division, the bouncers, led by Kenpachi Zaraki. Their job was to keep the strip club in order, and to kick out anyone who wasn't willing to pay, or got to rowdy.

Since the house was so elaborately designed, only trusted people were allowed to become employees. If you weren't already part of a family working at the house, it was nearly impossible to get a job there, but if you were part of a family, well it was nearly impossible to _not_ get a job. Ichigo didn't know if this was a blessing or not, since watching half of his friends grinding on a pole from 9 at night to 3 in the morning did not amuse him at all. And neither did the fact of knowing that the other half were screwing old perverts somewhere in those back bedrooms. The one thing he knew was a blessing, and that he was relieved to discover, was that none of his old high school friends were the one's grinding on the poles, although quite a few were A-class whores.

He shook his head; he didn't like to think about that. Instead he opened his eyes and focused more on the people in the room. _Where the fuck is Grimmjow?_ He thought irritably, searching for the familiar bright blue hair among the small crowd. He then remembered that about an hour ago, a female had requested Grimmjow's presence in one of the back rooms; bastard was a bouncer _and_ a whore. He grunted in disgust, _he should be coming out soon enough. _He glanced around the rest of the room, suddenly interested in what his friends were doing.

Kasumi was passing out drinks; Tatsuki, taking orders; Keigo, trying to balance a tray of food; Mizuiro, disappearing behind the kitchen door with dirty plates; Chad, standing next to him against the wall; Uryu, scanning the room and probably texting information to Rin; Ikkaku, talking to Yumichika at the bar; Ganju, passing a drink to a customer; Shuhei, mixing drinks; Kensei…odd he couldn't find Kensei; Kenpachi, slowly strolling the casino; Rojuro, chatting it up with a customer at the bar; Sentaro, cleaning the bar's counter; Michiru, bringing plates of food to customers; Ryo, narrowly missing being grabbed in the ass; Mahana, grabbing a drink off Kasumi's tray as she serves people; even Yoruichi and Urahara showed up to survey and do whatever managers did.

Ichigo closed his eyes, sighing again for the fourth time in five minutes. He was about to sigh again when he heard a voice over the roar of the music. Peeling his eyes open, he looked down to see a girl with brown hair and deep violet eyes staring up at him, the look on her face was full of concern. She was wearing the waitress uniform at the strip club, which consisted of black high-heeled boots, fishnet stockings, a black mini-skirt, white see-through buttoned blouse, and a black lacy bra. Her name was Kasumi Takahashi; she was a member of the Tenth Division, also known as the caretakers of the strippers, was a stripper herself, and a waitress.

"This is the fourth time you've sighed in five minutes." She said, well yelled, over the music of the club. So his sighs haven't gone totally unnoticed…

"What of it?" He asked gruffly, rubbing his temple with his fingers. She cocked her head to the side before shaking it softly and turning to glare up at him.

"I take it your bored." He only nodded, making her sigh. She turned her attention to the tray of sake bottles she was holding. "Well it is a Wednesday, we usually don't get much business. Here, I brought you guys some drinks."

She took two off and handed them both to Ichigo and Chad. "How's your fam doin'?" She asked as they popped the tops off the bottles.

"Fine." He grunted, taking a swig. "Thanks, Kira."

Hurriedly, she glanced around the room, before letting her eyes settle on him again. "Sh! You know you're only supposed to use my stage name while customers are here!"

"Forgot." He said simply, shrugging nonchalantly as he took another sip. "So how's things with Shuhei?"

Kira visibly blushed, turning her head away from him to try and conceal the red tint on her cheeks. "There good. Thanks for asking."

Ichigo only rolled his eyes; Kira and Shuhei had been together for over two years now. He was aware of the small black box that Shuhei has been constantly carrying around for the past few weeks, and vaguely wondered when the man was finally gonna grow some balls and ask her to marry him already. He was just about to say something else when Ikkaku yelled his name across the way. He looked up to see the said cue ball coming over.

"'Ey! Ichigo!" Ikkaku said as he neared the three employees, he gave them his trademark smile before placing the bat he was carrying lightly on his shoulder. Always had to carry some kind of weapon with him, same old Ikkaku.

"What up?" Ichigo asked as Ikkaku grabbed a bottle off Kasumi's tray and fluffed her hair with his hand, earning him a furious scowl.

"Not much. Slow day or what?" He leaned against the wall on Ichigo's left side, popping his bottle of sake open.

"No shit." Ichigo sighed, placing his now empty bottle of sake on Kasumi's tray and grabbing another one.

"Pig." She whispered, but he ignored her as he opened it.

"Anyone hit on you yet?" Ikkaku jutted his chin out to Kasumi, who in return looked over her shoulder, scowled, and then turned back to them.

"Yeah. That bastard at table four keeps grabbing my ass." This time she snatched a bottle off her tray, expertly opening it with one hand before taking a long swig and replacing it.

"Good thing Shuhei hasn't noticed." Ikkaku smirked, turning his attention back to Ichigo. "Speaking of Hisagi, where's Jaegerjaquez?"

"He was requested by a female customer." Ichigo replied, subconsciously glancing to the large double doors lying behind the bar.

"Ah. Bastard gets all the females." Ikkaku grumbled, taking a nice swig of sake.

"Not all. Stark, Renji, and Ulquiorra are prostitutes too." Chad reminded them, finishing his sake and placing the empty bottle back on the tray.

Ikkaku smirked. "They're whores is what they are. Anyway, you've seen Muguruma?"

Ichigo shook his head. "Nah, been looking for him, but I can't find him."

"Weird." Ikkaku said quietly, taking another swig before glancing back at the bar, he smiled wickedly. "Speak of the devil."

The others followed his train of sight before letting their own eyes rest upon a fairly muscular man with alarming bright blue hair, Grimmjow. He smirked at them as he made his way over, grabbing a bottle of sake off Ryo's tray as he passed. "'Ey Strawberry, Cue-Ball, Muscles." He greeted them with a nod of his head before turning his attention to Kira, the smirk turning into a smile. Sneakily he started to wrap his arm around her body, his hand coming to rest on her breast. "Hey Sexy-OOF!"

"Grimmjow!" Kira cried over the noise of the club, raising her fist over his crumpled form. "Don't you dare touch me! I have a boyfriend! If you ever try and grab my breast again, I'll castrate you, ya hear?"

"The name's Yasutora." Chad added as Grimmjow smirked before getting to his feet.

"Whatever. You know I can't remember names for shit." He replied simply, wiping blood away from his mouth with his hand. He straightened up; his eyes lingering on Kira's angry form. "C'mon. You must have gotten bored with that Hisagi guy by now."

Kira snorted, grabbing her tray back from Ikkaku, whom she had shoved it at before bringing her foot up to connect with Grimmjow's face. "No. As a matter of fact I haven't, and most likely never will." She whispered the last part.

"Whatever. I can wait." Grimmjow yawned; ignoring Kira's almost silent muttering of 'bastard'. He glanced around at the three other bouncers. "Where the hell is Zaraki?"

"Casino." Chad tilted his head to the left. Grimmjow grabbed another bottle of sake from the half-full tray as he searched the casino/arcade area for Kenpachi's crazy bell-hair. "What about Whitey?"

"Disappeared awhile ago." Chad replied, knowing that he was talking about Kensei; Grimmjow only shrugged as he leaned against the wall. The five stood in comfortable silence for a few minutes, before the song blasting from the speakers increased its tempo.

"Shit! Lisa's almost done with her show, and I'm up next." Kira sighed before turning to the five. "See you guys after my dance, I'll bring you more sakes." She added, before swiftly making her way through the tables and over to the bar.

"Oh…so Lisa's up there. Makes sense." Ikkaku smirked, folding his arms across his chest as he absentmindedly watched Kira converse with Shuhei at the bar.

"Excuse me?" Chad grunted turning his head to look at Ikkaku.

"Kensei." Ichigo said before Ikkaku could reply. He smiled ruthlessly, closing his eyes before continuing. "He's got a thing for Lisa, won't admit it, but everyone knows, well except for her. Anyway, he can't stay in the same room when she dances, apparently he gets too excited."

"Speaking of excitement." Grimmjow's smile widened as he gestured with his eyes over to Shuhei, who had just finished kissing Kira and was currently watching her as she disappeared behind the door of the bar. "How much ya wanna bet he's gonna crack?"

"Heh. Twenty says he leaves the room." Ikkaku pulled a twenty-dollar bill out of his pocket and flashed it at the others.

"Thirty says he attacks the stage." Ichigo said evenly, extracting some bills from the pocket of his black skinny jeans. Shoes, black skinny jeans, white wife-beaters, and black fingerless gloves made up the bouncer uniforms.

"Fifty says he stays and watches." Chad replied quietly.

Grimmjow shook his head, smiling wickedly as he pulled a hundred bucks out of the waistband of his jeans. "Hundred says he comes in his pants."

"Your on." Ikkaku's grin widened considerably. In response, their heads turned towards the stage as they waited in sheer anticipation. They watched the remaining half of Lisa's show in silence, and then waited with thin patience for Kira's turn.

"What the hell are you bastards doing?" They turned their heads in the direction of the noise, their eyes falling on none other then Kenpachi Zaraki.

"Hey boss." Ikkaku greeted, leaning his head back against the wall.

"Where's Yachiru?" Chad asked, gesturing to Zaraki's bare back.

"Doing some paperwork with Kyoraku's girl." He replied, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he eyed them warily. "Now tell me, what are you bastards up too?"

Grimmjow grinned maniacally. "Just making some friendly bets."

"Bout what?" They turned to see Kensei Muguruma making his way over to them, a bottle of sake in his hand.

"Hisagi's reaction to Kira's dancing." Ichigo clarified just as Grimmjow grinned evilly at Kensei and innocently stated, "How was your trip to the bathroom?"

Kensei shot Grimmjow a glare before taking a swig of his sake. "That again? Who won last time?"

"I did." Chad stated simply, fiddling with his gloves. Ichigo sighed irately, the _still_ empty stage making him slightly more irritated then he was before, if that was even possible. Taking his eyes off the extravagant set, he noticed Tatsuki with a tray full of sake bottles, and with an inclination of his head, caught her attention and waved her over.

"What did you bet?" Kenpachi asked yawning as he took his phone out of his pocket and checked for messages.

"He'll get a boner." Chad replied evenly.

"Seventy on that one." Zaraki stated, stuffing his phone back into his pocket.

Ikkaku slapped his back before shouting out a loud. "Yeah boss!"

"What the hell are you guys talking and laughing about?" Tatsuki asked as she approached the group, the sake bottles clinking as she waved the full tray carelessly in front of them.

"Yes! More sake!" Ikkaku cried, his hands instinctively grasping a bottle. Zaraki pulled it out of his hand before he could open it, and took a big swig from it.

"No more for you." He growled, "You've had enough."

"What? That is hardly fair, I've only had…four." He held up three fingers for emphasis. Zaraki growled something incoherent that sounded a lot like 'drunk dumbass' and then demanded someone correct Ikkaku cause he was 'tired as fuck of having to correct him, himself.' Wordlessly, Chad stuck four fingers in front of Ikkaku's face; Ikkaku looked from his hand to Chad's, and then back to his. "Dammit, I meant four, four!" He nearly yelled, fumbling with his fingers as he tried to raise the correct amount.

"Already wasted are we Ikkaku?" Tatsuki smiled ruthlessly, grabbing a sake bottle and dangling it in front of his outstretched hands.

"Would ya like me ta sober him up a bit?" Grimmjow grinned wickedly as he cracked his knuckles.

"I'd rather not lose another bouncer, Jaegerjaquez." Zaraki replied swiftly, referring to the time Grimmjow had gotten into a tussle with Yumichika about who was more 'beautiful' and ended up pulling the pretty man's hair to the point that some of it actually fell out of his head. After that day Yumichika had transferred out of the Eleventh Division and into the safer, more beautiful environment of Squad Nine, also known as the bartenders.

Grimmjow's grin widened considerably as his eyes automatically shifted in the direction of Yumichika, the bright blue irises landing on a patch of irregular growing hair. "Whatever you say Zaraki." He waved it off dismissively, his already short attention spam dissipating as he grabbed a sake bottle that Ikkaku was trying unsuccessfully to reach.

"Gimme!" Ikkaku demanded, practically pouncing on Grimmjow, who growled in irritation. "Now!"

"Get the fuck off me, you bald headed freak!" Grimmjow yelled; tossing his still closed bottle up in the air, which Chad effortlessly caught, before handing it to Ichigo. "Hey! That's mine!"

"Was." Ichigo corrected, opening the bottle and taking a swig. It was on days like these that he didn't mind getting hopelessly smashed; with idiots like these for co-workers, who wouldn't want to get wasted?

"Give it back, else I'll-!" Grimmjow shouted, but was cut-off when Ikkaku used a rather clumsy wrestling move on him that involved his elbow and Grimmjow's lower back. "Holy shit!"

"So Ichigo…" Tatsuki started, turning away from the two idiots who were in the middle of beating each other to the state of vegetables. "How's everything been lately?"

"Fine." He shrugged nonchalantly. Everything was fine, as usual. Nothing exciting ever happened in his life anyway, he hated to admit it, but the only semi-surprising thing that had ever happened, was when his dad admitted that he managed an illegal whore business. And even that, after a long while of getting used too, lost its sense of excitement. Finishing school didn't help the situation either, ever since then, all Ichigo did was work, sleep, drink, hang out with friends, go home, and maybe go on a blind date every once in awhile, courtesy of Grimmjow that fucking blue-haired twat. But besides that, life was relatively boring and uneventful, which was mostly why he drank, drinking at least kept things interesting.

"Karin and Yuzu?" Tatsuki continued as she sidestepped Ikkaku's mad grab for one of the sake bottles on her tray, the sudden movement leaving him no time to react which resulted in a bone-crushing face plant in the poor wall. Ichigo shook his head, blatantly ignoring Ikkaku's pain filled howls as he opened his mouth to answer.

"There good too." He replied, trying to ignore the throbbing vein that was soon to be protruding from his forehead. "How are you and Keigo doing?"

She tilted her head and stared oddly at him, "We broke up."

"You did?" He asked, barely concealing what little surprise he felt at learning such information. All he could think of was, if it were true, how happy a certain redheaded pineapple would be when he found out. That redheaded bastard, or whore, or whatever the hell he was, had been after Tatsuki for the past two years, but he was too damned nervous to do anything about it. Damn bastard could fuck a whole house full of bitches, but once it came to Tatsuki, damn ass had no more balls.

"Yeah, 'bout a week ago. You didn't know?" Ichigo stared at her, receding into his thoughts as a vague memory poked at his mind. All he could remember was a clearly sobbing, yet still very dramatic Keigo, droning on and on about his horrible life and Tatsuki and…oh…so that's what he was talking about…

Ichigo groaned, how the hell could he have known that's what was bothering Keigo? If only the damned bastard didn't complain about everything and anything, then maybe Ichigo would pay a little attention to what the moron was saying. Ah well, Mizuiro and Chad were there to console him, and it wasn't like Ichigo would ever show that he actually cared for Keigo, especially if there was a chance of the action damaging his hard earned reputation.

A laugh brought him out of his thoughts and he looked down to see Tatsuki chuckling at him. "Let me guess, you tuned him out when he told you, like you always do."

Ichigo glared at her, making Tatsuki laugh harder. Grumbling incoherently, he easily sidestepped Ikkaku's grab for the sake bottle in his hand. Taking a swig from it, he placed it lazily on top of the tray, content with the amount of alcohol already flowing through his blood stream. "Ah too funny." Tatsuki breathed, after she regained her composure. "But yeah, we broke it off, or I should say, I broke it off."

"Why's that?" Chad asked politely as he grabbed a full bottle off the tray and handed it over to Kensei, ignoring the indignant cries of Ikkaku as he hopelessly tried to swipe the bottle out of his hand. His cries shot up a couple of octaves as Grimmjow picked up the bat he was using before and started to grind the tip mercilessly into Ikkaku's crotch. Ikkaku howled, flinging his arms about lamely as he tried to escape.

"Oh you know, just too many differences. He kept badgering me about the smallest things, and I just felt like I couldn't breathe, so I broke it off. Were still friends though." She waved her hand dismissively as if the whole thing didn't really matter, before wincing as Grimmjow's crazed yell filled the room.

"You son of a-!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Ichigo winced, resisting the urge to cover his ears as his head started to pound. Dammit. Why did his head already hurt? He wasn't supposed to feel the pain until the next morning. Fuck. How many beers had he had again…three? …Four…? Maybe five? Shit! He couldn't remember. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to soothe his throbbing head. He sighed in relief; thank God the pain was almost gone... "EXCUSE ME?"

Ichigo's eyes snapped open, the bright lights in the club stinging them and worsening his headache. Irritably he turned, ready to yell at Tatsuki, when he noticed she wasn't standing in front of him anymore. Mildly surprised, he looked to the side and, without meaning to, let his jaw drop. There was Tatsuki, sake in one hand, bat in the other. Her foot placed carelessly on Ikkaku's crotch, the slight pressure causing him to tear up. The arm that was holding the bat was lying lazily around Grimmjow's neck, the tip of the bat resting, threateningly, on the top of his head.

Tatsuki smirked at him, taking another swig of her sake. "Would ya like ta say that again?" She was smiling, but Ichigo knew that smile, one wrong move, and it was over.

Grimmjow just glared at her, deciding against speaking out, knowing it would only earn him a good conk on the head and some sure-to-be-busted nuts. Tatsuki's smile widened. "Thought so." She mused, dropping the bat, and using her free hand to lightly smack Grimmjow's cheek, earning her a malicious glare that only succeeded in making her chuckle.

"Now back to what I was saying before." She turned her attention away from the fuming Grimmjow, to the oh-so-totally-drunk Ikkaku. "Ikkaku, do you remember that conversation we had last week?"

"Which one?" He asked lazily, he sucked in a breath as Tatsuki dug her big toe into his privates. "Oh! You mean the sake one?"

"Yes! Well done! You aren't as completely hopeless as I thought you were." She smiled evilly at him, shifting her weight to the other foot, causing his face to instantly relax. "Anyway, do you remember exactly how the conversation went?"

"Well not exactly." Ikkaku started, the response visibly worsening his situation as he winced at the sudden pressure, again applied to his crotch. Chad and Ichigo exchanged a quick glance. God, Ikkaku was stupid. Anymore dumb comments and he wouldn't be able to walk for days. Ichigo rolled his eyes, when was he gonna learn that you just don't mess with Tatsuki? "Uh, you told me I had a limit to the amount of sake I could consume a day."

"Exactly." Tatsuki beamed, placing a hand on her hip before taking another drink of her sake. "If you haven't noticed already Ikkaku, your beyond your limit. Therefore, you will not have anything else to drink but soda or water for the rest of the night. And if I were you, I would think twice before arguing. I highly doubt you'd want me to tear off your balls, now would ya?" He shook his head no, and she smirked, taking her foot and lightly grinding it into his crotch, just to get the message across, before removing it completely. "Oh and no more yelling. My head's already pounding from the damn music, I do not need you two shrieking on top of that."

She turned on Grimmjow. "And that goes for you too Blueberry."

"Why you little-!" Grimmjow started, but of course, never finished. His nasty comment dying in his throat as a rather large fist connected with his head, hard.

"Picking on girls again, Jaegerjaquez? Don't you think you're a little too old for that?" A gruff voice said behind Grimmjow.

Grimmjow turned slowly, a snarl on his face. "Damn you, Abar-!"

"Well…that was easier then I thought." The tall man smirked as he stared at Grimmjow's crumpled figure on the floor.

"Hey Renji!" Tatsuki smiled up at the redhead. "I take it your feeling better."

Renji grinned, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Much better. That soup you brought over was delicious, you've got to make me some more!"

Tatsuki laughed, turning to retrieve her tray from Chad. Ichigo blinked, when the hell did he get her tray? He sighed; _I really have got to start paying attention to these things._ "Maybe. If I feel up to it again." She beamed, before glancing back up at the stage. "Anyway, it's 'bout time I return these empty bottles, my arms are starting to ache, not to mention Kira's show is going to be starting too, and knowing you guys, you've already made bets…right?"

She eyed them, smiling triumphantly when they all chose to avoid her gaze. "Well in that case." She smirked as she adjusted the tray on her arm before pulling out a couple twenties from the inside of her bra. "Eighty says he jerks off behind the bar." She turned to walk away, remembered something, and turned back. "Oh! And speaking of dances and bets, did you leave the room again?"

Kensei scowled from his spot against the wall. "Yes. …What…?" He asked as she continued to glare at him through narrowed eyes.

"Dammit! Now I owe Rangiku forty bucks. Do you see what you do to me Muguruma? How is a girl supposed to keep food on the table if she's always losing money cause you can't control yourself?" She demanded, her choice of words making the others smirk.

"Don't go blaming me cause you bet your money and lost. Your poor gambling skills are not my fault." He snarled, adjusting his gloves as he grabbed the second to last sake bottle off her tray.

"Yeah whatever." She rolled her eyes before turning to Renji and gesturing to the tray. "Want one?"

"Sure." Renji took the bottle, but stilled when he heard Ikkaku's piteous whine, he glanced down, momentarily distracted. A grin broke across his face as he took in Ikkaku's rumpled appearance. "Drink too much again?"

Ikkaku nodded, making Renji throw his head back in laughter. "Well, sucks for you faggot." His grin widened as he slowly popped the top off the bottle and took a nice long gulp from it. Ikkaku's whine intensified, but ended just as quickly when Tatsuki's foot connected with his crotch.

"So anyway, as I was saying." Tatsuki started, turning away from the now moaning Ikkaku. "I better get going. Oh before I forget though, Ichigo, have you seen Uryu?"

"Yeah…I saw him earlier. He should still be here." Ichigo looked around the room, glad to be distracted for a moment, the lack of a bottle in his hand driving him crazy. As he glanced around the room, in search of the elaborately dressed, glasses wearing, tall, lanky, pale boy, he couldn't help but notice Keigo, openly glaring at the group. He was probably pissed about how obviously close Renji was to Tatsuki. "Never mind. Looks like he left. You want me to call him or somethin?" He asked, tearing his eyes away from Keigo and sticking his hand in his pocket.

Tatsuki shook her head as she passed the tray to her other arm. "Nah. It's probably better that he's gone. Considering I'm only looking for him cause Orihime wanted me to give him his late night snack, he 'accidentally' left it on the kitchen counter before heading to work."

The others visibly cringed; Orihime was always cooking some kind of weird…food. She ate the strangest things; chocolate pudding with soybeans and red bean paste, rice balls with salsa and cheese, and other abnormal concoctions that were just too nauseating to state. They had all been forced to eat some of her food, even Grimmjow, when Tatsuki had shoved it down his throat to keep Orihime from crying.

"Where is it?" Kensei asked warily. The others tensed, last time Orihime had brought some of her food, they had sworn the thing was alive, randomly popping up in places where normal food wouldn't be found, of course, nobody had listened to a damn thing they said, but it was worth a shot.

"Oh somewhere behind the bar counter." Tatsuki waved dismissively. "Anyway, if he shows up again, just tell him where it is, and that Nnoitra Jiruga is back. We've gotta figure out a way to get rid of him, sure he brings a lot of money in but…there's something about him that I just don't like…"

Ichigo grunted in agreement, barely listening to Renji's assured comment that they would find a way, his mind drifting off. Nnoitra Jiruga, that horny bastard. He was a regular. Everyday they were open; he'd walk through those damned double doors, wave a huge wad of bills at Yoruichi, and then demand Orihime. He wouldn't go to any of the other members of the Thirteenth Division, even though there were about eight other whores besides Orihime. Either way, he was an arrogant, little bastard. And everyone hated him, everyone. No one in the club, clients and employees alike, liked him. Even the bosses of the thirteen squads asked Yamamoto to "get rid" of him, but the old geezer wouldn't budge. Something bout, he brings in a lot of money, and without him, our business would surely fall and blah, blah, blah.

Sure, the ass brought in around hundreds, but like Tatsuki said, there was just something about him. In the way he carried himself, his voice, his appearance, his smile, in everything he did, something just didn't seem right. Not to mention, that annoying as fuck servant he always brought, what was his name again? Tesla...? Well either way, the guy was an idiot. Following Nnoitra around, obeying his every command. He was like a lost puppy, idolizing the son of a bitch, for God knows what. Ichigo cringed; he hated Tesla as much as he hated Jiruga, and the whole thing with Orihime and Uryu just made everything worse. Ichigo couldn't believe Uryu's lack of luck, to fall in love, let alone, be engaged to an A-class whore. God, family life must suck. He almost felt bad for Uryu; almost, not quite. But yes, Uryu and Orihime were engaged. They had been engaged since November, and was that a messy ordeal, or what. Yamamoto had a strict policy when it came to dating, engagements and marriages among his workers, so of course, when his best informant asked for the opportunity to propose to his best whore, well…Yamamoto wasn't happy in the least.

Of course he agreed though, an unhappy whore meant an unhappy client, and that just meant less customers and in the end, less money. And if there was anything Yamamoto loved more then himself, it was money. So Uryu asked for Orihime's hand, she agreed, and now their wedding was scheduled for some time in October. Of course, Tatsuki was to be the maid of honor, and after much griping and begging, Ichigo finally agreed to be the best man. _That reminds me, I still gotta go buy a tux. _He thought sourly.

"Hey Ichigo." Ichigo looked up, pulled out of his thoughts to see Renji standing in front of him. Tatsuki had left, weaving her way through tables as she balanced the tray on her arm, trying to avoid the outstretched hands of some horny customers as she passed by.

"What do you want Renji?" Ichigo asked, momentarily annoyed.

"Don't look so annoyed, I just wanted to know if Hisagi had asked Yamamoto yet." Renji scratched the back of his head, fixing the strip of cloth he always had tied around it.

Ichigo blinked, what the hell was Renji talking about? "…What…?"

"Hisagi." Renji sighed, rolling his eyes at Ichigo's confusion. "Has he asked Yamamoto if he can propose to Kira yet?"

Ichigo grunted, readjusting his position on the wall. "No not yet. He's trying to wait until Yamamoto cools down I think."

Renji's eyes widened. "Is he still pissed 'bout Ishida and Inoue?"

"Last time I checked yeah. But you know Yamamoto, the old bastard gets anal 'bout everything these days." Ichigo shrugged, before casting a sidelong-glance at Renji. "What about you? Have you asked yet?"

Renji's blush matched his hair perfectly. "No…I haven't even asked Tatsuki yet."

"Why haven't you?" Chad asked quietly, pulling a case of aspirin out of his pocket and taking four out, giving Ikkaku and Grimmjow two each.

"She just broke up with Asano, I'm not gonna go hound her. Not to mention, I'm not her type anyway, she'd probably say no." He replied, shrugging nonchalantly.

"Afraid of rejection are we? Heh. Pussy." Grimmjow spat, getting to his feet, a malicious grin spreading across his face. "Then again, if she dated you, she'd be downgrading, now wouldn't she?"

Renji snarled, his hands curling into fists. "What do you know, you blue-haired freak? Last time I checked your woman was off fucking another man."

"Bastard!" Grimmjow roared as he pulled his fist back at the same time Renji did, but just before they could release, Kensei intervened, grabbing onto both of their wrists, stopping their punches midway.

"Knock it off." He growled, dropping their hands and retrieving his sake from the floor, just before Ikkaku wrapped his greedy fingers around it. "Don't touch my beer, bitch."

Ikkaku whined piteously, his fingers grasping the air feebly. Kensei stared down at him, his face portraying a mild look of disgust, before turning away and taking a sip of his sake. Grimmjow, who was just getting over the shock that someone was fast enough to stop his punch, looked up in irritation.

"What the fuck was that for, Muguruma?"

"What was what for?" Kensei yawned before turning to look at Grimmjow, his expression somewhere between tired and annoyed.

"Don't fuck around with me! Why are you always getting in the way?" Grimmjow barked, his pale face reddening in barely concealed rage.

Kensei stared at him for a couple moments, before shrugging. "Cause you're a dumbass. And I don't feel like getting suspended just 'cause you did something stupid...again."

"Why you little-!" Grimmjow snarled as he stepped forward, but stopped when Kenpachi stuck his arm out.

"That's enough outta you Jaegerjaquez." He drawled lazily, his bell hair jingling as he tilted his head up. "Muguruma's got a point. If you two don't knock it off, I'm going to get that crazy ass, pig-tailed lesbian over here, and I don't want to even see her today. So you two can either shut the fuck up and do your job or, if you're really itchin' for a fight, you can fight me. What do ya say?"

Grimmjow and Renji both visibly paled, which was amazing considering they were both already pretty pale to begin with. They shook their heads in unison and turned away from each other, they're mouths clamped shut.

"That reminds me, Ichigo." Kenpachi's wicked grin instantly widened, and Ichigo swore he could feel his heart drop into his stomach. He shuddered visibly as the blood-crazed lunatic continued to look at him hungrily, practically see his own death in the other man's eyes. A death he was not looking forward to experiencing at all. Silently he swore, wishing that when he first joined two years ago, he hadn't agreed to battle the frightening boss. Ever since that fight, a fight where he barely escaped with his own life, let alone victory, Zaraki had been after him for another duel, ecstatic that there was a man out there who had the strength to fight him, live through it, and potentially beat him at the same time. "How bout after work, around the building, alley on the right. Whatd'ya say?"

Ichigo's eyes flickered around the room, as he tried to think of a good enough excuse. Just as he was about to resort to running into one of the back rooms, like last time, a loud, piercing noise echoed throughout the club. The group of men instantly covered their ears, wincing as the high-pitched sound amplified itself, worsening their already strenuous headaches. Suddenly the noise stopped, and Ichigo slowly lowered his hands from his ears to find that a gruff voice had replaced the ear-splitting sound.

"Sorry about that gentlemen. Thank you all for waiting, our next act will begin shortly."

Ichigo gestured to the now brightly lit stage, a barely concealed look of relief on his face. "Maybe later, it's gonna start soon." _Later my ass._ Zaraki looked like a deflated balloon, but just nodded sullenly before returning to his position against the wall. The others followed suit, there eyes resting on Hisagi.

Grimmjow suddenly chuckled. "Looks like the bastard's noticed us."

Ichigo shook his head slightly, he had been zoning out again. He glanced at Grimmjow questioningly, the blue-haired bitch only grinned before nodding his head in the direction of the bar. Ichigo looked over and chuckled himself; Hisagi was giving them one of the dirtiest looks he'd ever seen.

"He must know were betting." Renji snickered as Shuhei decided to flash them two very censored birdies. They each, save for Kenpachi, stuck up one in return. "Hey, I think Ganju wants you Ichigo."

Ichigo sighed; damn bastard was calling him again? What the hell? Straightening himself, he grabbed his gloves back from Chad, who was holding them out to him, along with two aspirins. Ichigo nodded his head in thanks before swallowing the pills and walking over to where Ganju and the other bartenders were.

"Wassup?" He asked once he reached the bar, tilting his head up in greeting. Ganju grinned at him, grabbing out a glass and mixing a couple of colorful fluids before passing it over to Ichigo, who couldn't help but take a small sip.

The bigger man leaned in towards Ichigo, his face splitting into an almost sadistic grin as he glanced sideways at Hisagi, who openly glared at the two. His smile widened considerably as he raised his hand to cover his mouth. "I take it you guys are betting again." Ganju mused, wiggling his eyebrows in a way that made Yumichika grunt in disgust.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you. It just makes you look uglier." He sniffed as he delicately poured a glass for a customer. Ganju rolled his eyes before turning back to look at Ichigo.

"I want in, what are the bets?" Ichigo recounted the bets and amounts while Ganju listened intently, his lips making a satisfying smack when Ichigo finished. "'Bout the same as last time. Alright, put me sixty for the one 'bout jerking off behind the bar."

Ichigo nodded, grabbing the three twenties off the counter before turning to walk back to the other bouncers, when a hand on his shoulder forced him to halt. "Hey. So I heard some interesting news earlier from my big bro and sis." Ichigo stiffened, silent as he waited for Ganju to continue. "Apparently were getting a new worker."

The orange-head's vague interest rose a couple levels. The news of a new worker wasn't something that was always talked about. An illegal whorehouse had to be careful with how it picked its employees; one wrong slip up could end them all in jail. It may not look like a dangerous job, but it was. The police were always at their necks, strip clubs were monitored daily, they had to be careful who they brought in; they didn't need a spy for the officials. Ganju's next words made Ichigo's eyes widen. "A new whore."

"Whore?" Ichigo echoed, turning his head back so he could look at Ganju, who smiled at him, glad to have caught his interest. "Name?"

"Rukia Kuchiki."

* * *

**So did you like it? Let me know by reviewing. ^^ **

**Also let me know if there's any mistakes. I'll gladly fix them. **


	2. A More Than Reluctant Whore

**A/N: O_O WOOOW! This story has gotten a lot of...publicity...? Is that the right word? Well whatever, I'm sure you all know what I mean. But dang! I wasn't expecting so many people to like this. Makes me feel good that you guys do ^^. I appreciate all the reviews, alerts, and favorites, all of that really made my day, scratch that, it made my whole week. :D Also special thanks to White-Rabbit914 for not only reviewing but alerting and favoriting. I couldn't believe it when I opened my email and I had practically six emails from this awesome person. ^^ Thanks so much. And thanks to DeviantHollow23 too, your review made my whole day, I couldn't stop laughing. ^^. Now...what else did I have to say...oh right. **

**Updates. I am going to try to update at least once a week. My summer schedule (for the first time ever) has been stuffed with a crapload of well, crap. So the only thing I can promise right now is an update every week. I hope that works for everyone, and sorry for any inconveniences. Also, my internet has random moments where it likes to just stop working, so if I don't update its cause of that. I'm in the process of getting a new modem, or whatever the heck its called, so if you all could just bear with me I would greatly appreciate it. Now, onto the next thing. **

**Couples. Yes, we all love couples. But about the couples in this story. Not all couples are...permanent you could say. Just of course the standard Ichigo/Rukia because they are awesome and I love them together ^^. But all other couples are subject to change (save for the two mentioned and Ishida and Inoue), so if there is a couple you don't like, don't go crazy, cause they might not end up together. Also if there _is _a couple you don't like please do not leave me a nasty review, cause that is just rude and hurtful. If you must say anything negative about a couple, if you could do it nicely, that would be wonderful. Thanks.**

**Now for the last and final note before the chapter. I had a couple questions regarding my character Kasumi Takahashi and I wanted to apologize for the confusion. She's a character I made up a long time ago, back when I didn't know Bleach even existed (dark times). Anyway, when I first created her, I made her nickname Kira (cause I liked it) but I forgot to explain the reason why in the story. So due to the confusion, and how she could be easily mixed up with Izuru. I have decided to just call her by her given name Kasumi instead of her nickname, also Kira is not her stage name. Her stage name is something totally different, and she's not a female Izuru. They are two totally different people. So sorry for any confusion that might have caused. I wasn't very good at explaining it so I apologize. **

**Woo. That was a mouthful. lool. Now for the moment you've all been waiting for ^^. The story! If you could review too at the end that would be great! ^^**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. If I did there would be no room in my closet for clothes...**

* * *

Chapter Two: A More Than Reluctant Whore

Kuchiki Rukia sighed heavily as she checked the clock, making sure she had just enough time to take a shower before the limo showed up to take her to the club. The club, her new job. What was it again? Whore? Prostitute if you want to be nice. Rukia scoffed, whore…what a derogatory word. Back in school, when she thought of her future, complete with a husband, kids and a nice paying job, she never envisioned working at a house as a whore. It just wasn't something that frequently crossed her mind, but that was before her sister had passed away, before she discovered what kind of company Byakuya actually worked for, and before he was forced by Yamamoto to recruit her.

It was a weird, long and complicated story. But essentially, what had happened had screwed the family over multiple times. All that really mattered out of the story was that Yamamoto had seen her at the mall with a couple of friends and demanded that she be recruited into the house. Byakuya, boss of the sixth division, whose sole job was to recruit employees and customers, plain out refused. At first, Yamamoto didn't understand why Byakuya wouldn't do it, the old man had no idea about Kuchiki's marriage to Hisana or that he had adopted Rukia. He commanded Byakuya to comply, or he would fire him, and subsequently have him murdered by one of the members of the third division (the punishment bestowed on Bosses if they were to leave or be fired).

Kuchiki stood his ground, and just as he was about to resign himself to his fate, Hisana intervened. She admitted she had known about the business from day one, stating she had come across a document on his desk about it when she was cleaning his office one day. Calmly, she negotiated with Yamamoto and offered her services instead of Rukia's. He agreed, and so her new job was set, but before she could start, she fell ill. Her health rapidly deteriorated, and before Byakuya or Rukia knew it, Hisana had passed. The first year was horrid, Rukia hadn't known at first, but Yamamoto was demanding compensation, well more like demanding her.

Amazingly, Kuchiki was able to delay Rukia's recruitment, but not for long. So her she was, two years later, watching TV, eating ice cream and resisting the urge to stab herself multiple times with the spoon. How the hell did she get herself into this mess? She didn't want to be a whore; she didn't want to fuck some old pervert that had to take a pill just to get his penis to stick up. There were just too many questions. _What if they want something that I'm not willing to give? What if I get pregnant? What if I get a disease? Like herpes, or worse…AIDS?_ Rukia shuddered, she didn't like this, didn't like this at all, but at the same time, she couldn't do that to Byakuya.

She couldn't just let him die, just because she didn't have a job. So she let him believe she wanted one, let him believe that all her life she had been dying to be a whore. Hopefully it wouldn't be so bad though, Renji worked there, as a whore too, at least she'd be able to hang out with him. Not to mention, she might make more friends there, Byakuya told her it was a large organization. Who knows, maybe she'd have fun. Rukia scoffed again, _yeah right. I've gotta fuck some horny pervert, how is that fun?_ Sighing, she shook her head, not wanting to dwell on those depressing thoughts any longer.

Picking up the remote, she turned the TV off before shoving the half eaten container of ice cream back in the fridge. She'd eat the rest later, when she got home, she knew she'd need it. _At least, _she thought as she grabbed at towel before entering the bathroom, _I won't be fucking anyone today. Nii-sama told me it was just an orientation; I'll be introduced to all the different divisions and then be led through the whole process of the day by day business and do all the other stuff they might want me to do, and after that, go home. It'll be easy, just like Nii-sama said. _Rukia nodded confidently, turning the shower on before closing her eyes and envisioning her new life as a whore in a more positive manner. A minute passed, and her eyes snapped open, a gargled noise making its way up her throat.

"Dammit! This is never going to work!" She cried, angrily hitting the wall with her fist. Hurriedly, she splashed some water onto her face, trying to calm herself down. It wouldn't do her any good to get angry; it'd just make matters worse. She took a few deep breaths as an idea started to form in her mind. What had Byakuya told her again? About whores? Something like, if you weren't at least B-class, you were let go. That's it! The corners of her mouth stretched into a grin as she thought about it. All she had to do was be the worst whore in history, and Yamamoto would fire her. Her grin widened, it was a genius plan really, and she never had had much experience in sex anyway, so it wouldn't be that hard. Content with her new plan of action, Rukia stepped into the steaming hot shower.

About an hour later, she was ready. Walking into the living room, she was just about to sit down when her phone rang. "Hello?"

"**I'm outside."**

She sighed. "Already? Alright, I'll be right there." Hanging up the phone, she checked the mirror one last time, before grabbing her keys and stepping outside.

* * *

"Kuchiki?" Ichigo echoed, his eyes as wide as saucers. "As in Kuchiki, Kuchiki?"

"If you mean Kuchiki, as in Byakuya Kuchiki, boss of company six, then yes, that's the right Kuchiki." Ichigo's head snapped to the left, his wide eyes resting on Yoruichi Shihoin, one of the five managers of the house. She ignored his stare, instead turning her glare on Ganju, who subconsciously shrank back. "Shiba, that information is classified, where'd you hear it?"

Ganju described the conversation between his brother and sister, watching as Yoruichi's frown deepened considerably. Meanwhile, Ichigo was speechless. Kuchiki? Since when did he have relatives? Rukia…that sounded like a girls name. Was this Rukia girl, his wife? His daughter? The leader of the sixth division, was a cold, almost heartless man, how did he come into the possession of a wife?

"Kukaku and Kaien are not going to be happy when they hear that you were eaves dropping, Ganju." Yoruichi stated gravely as she took a sip from the martini Yumichika passed her.

"What? I didn't eavesdrop! They were discussing it openly!" He protested, waving his hands in front of his face.

Yoruichi's left eyebrow rose. "Was the door open?"

Ganju blinked in surprise, before opening his mouth. "No."

"Well then, that would be known as eavesdropping, wouldn't it?" She replied lightly, mixing her drink with a finger.

"Please don't tell Kukaku! You've seen her when she's angry!" He pleaded, earning him another disapproving noise courtesy of Yumichika.

"Begging is not beautiful, it's ugly." He sniffed, turning away, his nose in the air.

"Yes I have." Yoruichi nodded, ignoring Yumichika's remark. "But don't worry, I have no intention of telling your sister. The information you heard was accurate, a young woman by the name of Rukia Kuchiki will be starting here tomorrow. Though she will be coming in today, to meet you all and learn protocol."

"So were really getting a new whore?" Ganju's face brightened considerably.

Yoruichi regarded him with mildly disgusted eyes. "Yes. Don't look so happy about it, you pervert."

"Pervert?" Ganju cried indignantly. "I was just stating my enthusiasm for the thirteenth company, its not everyday we get new workers up in here."

"Sure." She retorted, eyeing him reproachfully, before turning her gaze to Ichigo, a smile on her face. "Oh, speaking of perverts. Ichigo! How've you been?"

Ichigo's face instantly hardened, his surprise expression turning into one of disgust. "What's that supposed ta mean?"

Her smile widened as she leaned her cheek against her hand. "Oh, nothing. Nothing." Yoruichi's grin hardened as she scrutinized Ichigo thoughtfully. "You know, I hate to admit it, but you've really grown. What happened to the sixteen-year-old I used to know, who would turn bright red at the first mention of boobs?"

"He grew some balls." Ichigo muttered, making Yoruichi laugh. When she was done chuckling she regarded him again, an amused look on her face.

"Look at you. You're still the same as always. Even as a teenager you were still so cynical. Hell, I'd be surprised if there was a girl out there who had the guts to screw you." She sighed theatrically, covering her eyes with her hand but spreading two fingers apart just so she could see his reaction. When none came, she shouted in triumph. "I knew it! You've never been laid! You're a virgin!"

Ichigo, who had been drinking his drink, spit it out in a wide spray of alcohol mixed with bodily fluids. "What? Yoruichi!"

"Oh! I can't believe my little strawberry has never even had sex!" She continued, dramatically flailing her arms about as the other employees and customers at the bar proceeded to laugh behind their hands.

"Yoruichi!" Ichigo hissed, his cheeks flaring red as he shot numerous people death glares.

"What am I to do? How will I ever explain this to Kisuke? Or worse…your father?" She wailed piteously. At this point, the vein in Ichigo's forehead was a little short of enormous.

"YORUICHI! I'M NOT A VIRGIN!" He yelled, drawing the attention of nearby customers, who snickered until he flashed them a couple of glares. They quieted down and he turned his attention back to the smirking and snickering Yoruichi.

"Is that so?" She asked, her tone irritatingly calm. "And to whom, if I may ask, did you lose your virginity too?"

Ichigo sat back down, an agitated look on his face. "That is none of your business."

Yoruichi smiled almost ruefully. "As your aunt, well self-declared aunt, I make it my business. Who?"

"Yoruichi, it doesn't even matter. It happened years ago."

"Ichigo."

Ichigo cast her a sideways glance before sighing. "Senna."

"Girl with the weird ribbon in her hair?" Ichigo grimaced before nodding, earning him an irate scowl from Yoruichi. "Kurosaki Ichigo! What did I tell you about that girl?"

"She's bad news. Stay away. Blah, blah, blah." He recited, the last three words earning him a rather hard conk on the head.

"You idiot. Do you think I lied to you when I told you that? God, boys are such morons! Men too. They think they know everything, but they don't!" She snarled as she mixed her drink vigorously with her finger.

"Yoruichi." He hissed, quickly glancing around in embarrassment.

"Like Kisuke! I slave all day, cooking and cleaning for that lazy bastard, and when the horny asshole comes home, I'm ordered to fuck him till the break of dawn. What, I ask, is this world coming too?" She cried, throwing her hands up into the air.

"Yoruichi!" Ichigo's cheeks flared a dark red.

Yoruichi chuckled. "Too much information for you?"

"Way to much." Ichigo nodded, taking another sip of his now coca-cola.

"Alright fine, I'll stop. No one cares about my problems anyway, not even my self-declared nephew. Oh the pain of being an old woman." She sighed playfully, tipping her glass precariously on the bar counter.

Ichigo sighed as he rubbed his temple with his fingers. "Your not old."

"Close enough. Anyway, back to the more important topic. You're done with red ribbon girl…right?" She asked, shooting him that you-better-as-hell-say-right stare.

He looked away, exasperation written all over his handsome features. "Yoruichi."

"Right?" She pressed, her gaze hardening as she continued to stare at him.

Ichigo sighed. "Yes. She moved away months ago, she's in England."

"Good. I don't want that whore anywhere near here. Anyway, I gotta go make sure that everything is ready for Kuchiki's daughter. Until then, boys. Oh! Almost forgot. Your betting right?" Yoruichi grinned wickedly when Ichigo nodded his head in affirmation. "Good. I've got bets from Kisuke, Rangiku, Tetsuzaemon, Shinji and of course, myself. You ready?"

Ichigo nodded, glancing at Shuhei, who was still glaring maliciously at them, before reverting his eyes back to Yoruichi.

"Okay. Kisuke: one-twenty says he goes to the bathroom, or leaves the room, whichever. Rangiku: one-fifty says he can't handle it and jerks off behind the bar. Shinji: eighty says he throws money at her. Tetsuzaemon of course says he'll just get drunk and join in the dancing, that's ninety. And I say he sits and stays, one-ten. Ya hear that Hisagi? Sit and stay." Humor flashed behind Yoruichi's eyes as she tried to keep a straight face while looking at Shuhei.

"You are so lucky you're the manager…" He growled faintly making a grin break across her face.

"Or what?" He shut his mouth tight, making her grin widen considerably. "I thought so. Anyway, I better get going. Remember Hisagi, be a good boy. Sit and stay."

"Later Yoruichi." Ichigo raised a hand in farewell as he gathered up the money Yoruichi placed in front of him.

"Hey. Don't sit here to long, you know how anal Sasakibe gets when were not at our posts 24/7." Yoruichi stood and stretched, yawning as she did so.

"I know Yoruichi."

"Oh! And don't forget to give that to Zaraki. I may trust you with my money, but Kisuke sure doesn't."

"Whatever you say."

"Well you're a man of words aren't you? Whatever. See you after work." She rolled her eyes playfully before turning to leave. "Uh-oh. Ah, Ichigo. You might want to hurry."

Ichigo turned, his face portraying confusion. "What?"

"Shit. Where the hell did Hitsugaya go?" She groaned as she walked through the doors behind the bar.

"Hitsu-…Toshiro…?" Ichigo's eyes widened as his head snapped around, his deep brown irises resting on the open front door, and the young girl walking through it. "Karin?"

Karin turned at the sound of her brother's voice; her ever-present frown deepening as he practically flung himself at her, colliding into customers and employees without so much as a grunt. "What do you want Ichigo?" She asked irritably when he came to a stop in front of her, panting heavily.

"Karin! What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at home? Where's Yuzu? Is she at home? Why are you here?" He asked rapidly making Karin cross her arms in defiance.

"Relax Ichigo. Yuzu is fine; she's out with Jinta and I'm here to meet up with Toshiro, he told me to wait at the house but I got bored so I came here…is there a problem or something?" She inquired, her right brow rising in mock question.

Ichigo's eyes almost popped out of his head. "Yes there is! What did I tell you about coming here? It's not for kid's your age and-."

Karin rolled her eyes in annoyance. "Ichigo…I'm sixteen. I haven't been a kid in years, and its not like I don't know about these kinds of things. Really Ichigo, you worry too much."

"Karin! What if the old man came in here and saw you?" He whispered loudly, his arms flailing about in irritation.

"Then he'd demand I be recruited. Does it really matter?" She huffed, her hands resting on her hips.

"Yes it does!"

Renji cleared his throat, leaning towards the two. "Ah come on Ichigo. Lighten up. She is sixteen."

"Shut up Renji!" Ichigo growled, his face reddening with anger.

Karin sighed before turning to Renji and the others, intent on ignoring her seething brother. "Hey boys."

"Karin." Ikkaku tilted his head up as the others nodded in greeting.

"Cue-ball." She replied, a ghost of a smile on her lips, as he turned purple with unspoken rage. Just before he could say anything she turned back to Renji, unsuccessfully trying to hide the smirk that was now visible. "So Pineapple, how's it goin'?"

Renji scowled at her, and Karin couldn't help but smile a little. "Could you please stop callin' me that? And it's been alright."

"No I can't." Her smile widened by a fraction as she tilted her head to the side, her expression thoughtful. "Really? Have you asked out Tatsuki yet?"

"No! How does everyone know about that?" Renji sighed, throwing his hands up in the air in agitation.

"How can everyone not know about it? You practically drool every time she walks by. That reminds me," She smirked; eyebrows rising as she slowly turned her head to look at Grimmjow. "How's it goin' with your girl Blueberry?"

"What girl?" He grunted, eyeing her carefully.

"Oh? You're going to act oblivious now? Fine. Go ahead." She shrugged before glancing at Kensei, the smirk back on her face. "And I take it you walked out…again?"

He scowled at her and she couldn't help but laugh out loud. "Really. Boys are so pathetic, especially you guys."

"And why's that?" Chad asked casually over the other boys' protests, if they hated being called anything, it was pathetic.

Karin sighed dramatically as she started to count all the reasons why they were pathetic on her fingers. "Well let's see, most of you are hopelessly in love. Your all what like over 20? And none of you have a long-term girlfriend. Look at Uryu, he's getting _married_! Kasumi and Hisagi have been dating for _two_ years, and my sources tell me he's planning on proposing to her any day. Even Urahara, who's over thirty, is getting something! And what are you guys doing on Saturday nights? Working. Face it, you've all lost your touch."

"Your sources?" Ichigo's eyebrows shot up. Karin had _sources_? Giving her this type of information? Only a select few knew of Hisagi's planned proposal, how could she have gotten her hands on that kind of info? He eyed the others warily, but they all looked just as confused as he felt.

"I get something!"

Karin rolled her eyes, again. "You know what I mean Renji, and besides you're a whore, getting some is kinda in your job."

Renji grumbled something incoherent making the corners of Karin's mouth quirk up into a slightly sadistic smirk. "Well as much as I would love to stay and chat about whether or not you guys are complete losers, I have a date. So laters." She nodded before turning to leave.

"Wait, Karin." Karin stopped and irritably turned back around, practically glaring at her brother, which to him was unnerving, even though she was still about 5 inches shorter than he was.

"What do you want now Ichigo?"

"Who are your 'sources'?" He asked, ignoring his sister's angry undertone as he went to the heart of the matter.

"What?" Karin tilted her head to the side, utter boredom constructing her now more feminine features.

"Your sources."

"What about them?"

"Who are they?"

"Psh. Like I'm gonna tell you." She scoffed, rolling her eyes as she adjusted the strap on the bag over her shoulder; it had a strange bulge in it, probably a soccer ball.

"Karin." Ichigo's jaw tightened but before he could say anything else, her boyfriend had appeared at her shoulder.

"Karin! What did I tell you about coming here, it's not safe for you and- …Did I miss something?" The white-haired teen asked as he glanced at the others rigid forms.

"No Toshiro, I was just saying goodbye to my ass of a brother. And it's alright, nobody important saw me." Karin answered lazily, giving Ichigo a meaningful look before turning to face him. "You ready?"

"Yeah." He nodded before glancing at Kenpachi. "Zaraki."

The bouncer tilted his head in acknowledgment before turning back to his bottle of sake, Toshiro turned back to Karin, his gaze resting on Ichigo.

"Kurosaki."

"Toshiro."

The main vein in Toshiro's head throbbed. "It's Hitsugaya to you."

"Yeah, whatever." Ichigo shrugged, a smirk appearing on his face when he noticed the pounding vein on Toshiro's forehead.

Karin whispered something in her boyfriend's ear before shooting her brother another meaningful glare. "I'll see you later Ichigo."

Ichigo nodded dully, his gaze turning steely as he regarded Toshiro again. "Hey, make sure you get her home before twelve, you got that Toshiro?"

Toshiro gritted his teeth. "Hitsugaya! And yes Kurosaki, I know the drill. You ready?" He turned to Karin who just nodded before grabbing his hand.

"Yeah. Let's go." And before Ichigo could say anything else, the two were out the door and halfway down the street. He turned to the others, massaging his eyes as he thought about Karin's words. _My sources…_ "Who the fuck are her sources?" He asked aloud, drawing the attention of the others.

Renji shrugged, "How the fuck should I know?"

"What the fuck do you know?" Grimmjow snickered maliciously, the question making Renji's vein in his head pulse.

"Why the fuck does it matter?" Kensei drawled, lazily balancing a cigarette between his lips.

"It matters cause I don't want my sister anywhere near this fucking place! It's bad enough she's dating the fucking boss of group ten, I don't want her pulled into any of this shit!" Ichigo snarled; stuffing his hands in his pockets only to feel the big fat green bills Yoruichi had shoved at him earlier. Without another word he took them out, and passed the wad to Kenpachi. "Last thing I need is her dancing on that fucking pole and stripping for a bunch of old, horny as fuck, men."

"Well who the fuck does she talk too?" Grimmjow asked, his interest in annoying Renji, lost.

"Everybody. She talks to fucking everybody! Toshiro, Tatsuki, Kasumi, Orihime, Nel, Yoruichi, Uryu, Lisa, Hiyori, Shinji, Izuru, Momo, you guys, and God only knows who else!" Ichigo sighed as he opened his eyes, resting his penetrating gaze on his fellow bouncers, and Renji.

"Hey! We don't tell her shit! At least I don't." Ikkaku shouted quickly, putting his hands up in a protective gesture.

Ichigo growled. "No one in that fucking group would tell her anything, so where is she getting all this shit from?"

"Does she talk to Rangiku?"

Ichigo's eyes lit up. "Rangiku." Without even thinking, he spun around, his head snapping in the direction of the closed door behind the bar. Loud, obnoxious, trance music started to play as he strode across the room; the noise drowning out Grimmjow's call. Resting his hand on the doorknob, he barely registered the concerned glance Rojuro sent his way before the wood swung inward and he entered a small room. His eyes instinctively flickered to the gold plague next to the door across the tiny space. _Thirteenth Division: Ukitake Jushiro. Managers: Shiba Kaien and Shihoin Yoruichi._

Not even bothering to knock, he pushed the door open, before striding into the room. All three of the people mentioned on the plague looked up, both Kaien and Ukitake smiled warmly at him, but Yoruichi just raised a delicate eyebrow.

"Ichigo! Long time no talk! Come in and have a seat." Ukitake beamed, as he waved his hand, indicating the seat in front of him.

"Sorry Ukitake-san, but I'm in here on business." Ichigo stated bluntly, but politely. Out of the entire corporation, there were only two men Ichigo respected, and that was Ukitake Jushiro and Kyoraku Shunsui. They were also the only two who could make fun of him and get away with it.

Ukitake chuckled lightly. "That's alright, perhaps next time. Now, this business you spoke of, what is it?"

"I wish to speak with Rangiku sir." Yoruichi narrowed her eyes at him, but he ignored her, concentrating solely on the captain.

"Ah. Rangiku-san. Yoruichi-san! What is the current status of the young ladies and gentlemen?" The captain inquired, turning to his right where Yoruichi was sitting in the next desk over. The thirteenth division, next to the first and fourth divisions, was the most important and largest division of the house. The boss was Ukitake Jushiro, his second-in-command Shiba Kaien, and his own manager Shihoin Yoruichi. Since the division was so large, their job being to reside over the whores, waiters/waitresses and chefs, Yamamoto ordered the thirteenth to be split into three categories. In addition to leading the whole segment, Ukitake specifically looked after the waiters/waitresses; Shiba resided over the chefs, and Yoruichi took care of the prostitutes.

Giving Ichigo one last look of suspicion, Yoruichi glanced at the clock on her desk. "You came just in time Ichigo, it's their break period. There right through that door, but wait, Ichigo-!"

But it was too late; Ichigo had already opened the door, glanced at the sinful vision before him, and in turn cried out before slamming the door shut; his back against it and his eyes wild. "Th-There practically naked!" He choked out, groping at the doorframe in alarm.

Yoruichi stared at him, exasperation evident in her features. Kaien and Ukitake coughed lightly into their shoulders, trying hard not to burst out laughing. Finally, after a long moment of silence, save for Ichigo's ragged breathing, Yoruichi spoke. "Well considering what they do for a living, I'd be a little worried if they weren't practically naked, isn't that right Ukitake-san."

"Yes. Right. Quite right." He replied, his mouth quirking up into a smile.

"You do know what they do for a living…right Ichigo?" Yoruichi turned back to him, her brows rising in mock question.

"There practically naked!" Was all he said in return. She rolled her eyes.

"I think we've already established this Ichigo. But if it really _does_ bother you, I can ask them to put some clothes on." Not even bothering to wait for his answer, Yoruichi pressed a button on her telephone.

_Yes?_ Came the garbled voice.

"Nel. I need you to tell the others to get some clothes on."

_But Yoruichi-san, they already have clothes on._

"Well tell them to put more clothes on."

_Yes ma'am. _Nel paused. _Um…how is Ichigo?_

Yoruichi glanced at Ichigo, and though he wasn't sprawled up against the door anymore, he still looked more than mildly alarmed. "Traumatized, but other than that he's perfectly fine. Now hurry and tell the others, he's got some business with Rangiku and if he screams one more time I'm gonna have Sasakibe on my ass."

_Yes ma'am. _The line cut then, leaving the room in silence.

Yoruichi looked up from the phone. "Satisfied?"

"I did not scream!" Ichigo huffed at her, regaining his composure.

Yoruichi's brows disappeared in her hair. "Oh? Is that so? Well, last time I checked, a high-pitched sound unleashed from the human throat was, infact, called a scream. Right, Rangiku?"

"Right." Ichigo's eyes widened as he turned to face Rangiku. She was standing in the doorway, propped up against the wood frame, dressed in nothing but a rather large, see-through, white V-neck shirt. The red tint on Ichigo's cheeks darkened making the corners of Rangiku's mouth twitch upwards. "Ichigo." The seductive tone in her voice made his eye twitch and her smile widened. She gestured to the empty space behind her, grinning mischievously at him. "We're ready for you."

Trying to ignore his now pounding heart, Ichigo stepped towards the door, but just before he could push past Rangiku into the room, a voice wafted through the silence. "So much for growing balls." His eyes blazed as he turned quickly, about to verbally attack Yoruichi when Rangiku suddenly pushed him into the room, closing the door shut behind her. Clamping his open mouth shut, he narrowed his eyes at her, but she only continued to smile mischievously at him.

"So…you bring me some sake?"

"No, I-."

"Ichigo!" He turned at the sound of his name, his eyes resting on Orihime and Nel, who were sitting beside each other on an extravagant hot pink loveseat with dozens of neon-colored pillows sprawled across it. He had almost forgotten how weird the room's décor was. He had almost forgotten that they had remodeled it just a couple months ago. And he had almost forgotten that Rangiku was the one who chose everything.

Somehow, (Hitsugaya probably convinced him to keep his assistant happy), Yamamoto got the idea to have all the back rooms remodeled, and proving Ichigo's point that the man was insane, appointed Rangiku as the leader of the project. Well, needless to say, Rangiku went nuts. Everything she chose was either bright-colored, as in neon, or some sort of print, like zebra. The walls were painted black, with random splashes of color; a disco ball was hung from the ceiling, and weird looking floor lamps with colored light bulbs stood at random spots in the large room. As to the furniture: a wide assortment of bean bags; pillows ranging from ridiculously small to ridiculously large; and a couple of armchairs, couches and loveseats covered the floor.

"Hey." He nodded, stuffing his hands into his pockets as they jumped off the loveseat and raced over to him, Chizuru howling piteously as Orihime left her side. The two reached him at the same time, pulling him into a giant bear hug. "How are you guys?" He asked once they let go of him.

"Good." Nel smiled before running back to quiet down the now wailing Chizuru. Ichigo shook his head as he turned to Orihime. "How bout you?"

"Fantastic." She replied before giggling. "You?"

"Alright." He shrugged. "How's everything with…you know…"

Orihime grinned. "They've been good thank you. We're almost finished with the preparations. All I need now are the dresses and the flowers and I'm done."

"That's good." He nodded just as the door on the left side of the room opened. Behind him Rangiku made a noise of disgust and when he looked at the figure in the doorway, he understood why. Leaning against the wood frame was none other than Nnoitra Jiruga, covered in nothing but a sheet around his lower torso. Looking past the others, Jiruga's eyes landed on Ichigo. "Well, well, if it isn't the Kurosaki bastard."

"Watch yourself Jiruga." Ichigo replied calmly as he tried desperately to look impassive instead of murderous.

The longhaired twat snickered and Ichigo resisted the strong urge to punch him in the face. "And what if I don't? Watcha gonna do? 'Throw me out'?" Nnoitra laughed making the hairs on the back of Ichigo's next stand up. "We all know that's not gonna happen. Your boss loves me too fucking much."

"What do you want Jiruga?" Rangiku asked before Ichigo could open his mouth.

Turning away from Ichigo, Nnoitra's gaze landed on Rangiku, who was giving him the glare of a lifetime. "I was wondering why it was taking Orihime so long to get back."

Automatically, Rangiku stepped closer to Orihime, her motherly instinct kicking in. "We're on our break. It's standard procedure."

"Hm. Standard procedure. Well…three hundred dollars," Nnoitra pulled a couple of bills out from the inner part of the sheet. Ichigo's eye twitched; where the fuck did he put all that money? Up his ass hole? "says its not standard procedure."

"Jiruga! Get back in that room or so help me I'll-."

"Isn't threatening clients against the rules?"

"You bas-." Rangiku started, her eyes blazing as she took a step towards him, but a hand on her shoulder stopped her.

"Rangiku. Stop." Orihime interrupted as she lightly squeezed Rangiku's shoulder in earnest.

Rangiku looked at her incredulously. "But Orihime-."

"It's fine. Break is over in ten anyway." The orange-haired young woman stated calmly before regarding Jiruga. "If you could just go back to the room, I'll be there as soon as I can."

Nnoitra smirked. "Well don't take too long, otherwise I just might lose one of these hundreds." He waved the bills around for emphasis before leaving the room.

Rangiku stared at the empty space where Jiruga had been just a moment before, grinding her teeth together in barely suppressed rage. "Bastard. I swear, if I could just punch him in the fucking face..."

"I highly doubt that will have any affect." Harribel stated from her position in the corner.

"There must be some way to get rid of the asshole." She growled, her hands curling into fists. Orihime squeezed her shoulder again, offering her a strained smile.

"That's okay. He brings in a lot of money and that's all that matters…right?" Her smile widened in reassurance, but the sadness in her eyes was evident to the rest in the room. Before any of them could object, she nodded her goodbye and walked out.

Rangiku sighed in frustration as the door clicked shut. "Stupid girl. She's suffering just as much as the rest of us, even more so, but she won't admit it."

"She doesn't want to bother anyone." Ichigo shrugged, tearing his eyes away from the door. "Orihime has always been like that."

A small smile played across Rangiku's lips. "Hm. I guess your right. Anyway, why are you here, again? Seriously, if you didn't bring me any sake, why the hell did you even bother coming in here?"

Ichigo's mood darkened considerably. "What have you been telling my sister?"

Rangiku looked taken aback. "W-What? Your sister? What are you talking about?"

"Kurosaki Karin." Ichigo stated, his already small amount of patience growing smaller. "My sister. The girl dating Toshiro." He added when the confused look on Rangiku's face didn't disappear.

"Karin…Karin…Oh! That Karin?" Rangiku's face lit up, earning her a disbelieving look from Ichigo. "What about her?"

The main vein in Ichigo's forehead pulsed. "Have you been talking to her…recently?"

"Karin? No. It's been a while since she last showed up. Why?" She asked casually, casting Ichigo a sly look that said it all.

"What, and I mean _what_ have you been telling her?" He asked as he tried desperately to keep himself calm.

Rangiku shrugged. "Nothing important."

This time, Ichigo's eye twitched along with the vein. "Nothing? Do you call giving her detailed information like Orihime's engagement, Hisagi's plans for a proposal, and the fact that half of the bouncers are all apparently smitten for other workers, nothing?"

"Oh…that? Yeah, that's about nothing."

"Rangiku!"

Rangiku sighed as she crossed her arms in front of her chest, her large breasts threatening to explode out of the thin shirt she was wearing, the action made Ichigo's eye twitch again. "It wasn't my fault! I mean, I just heard the information and I couldn't help myself, and she was just there and-."

"And so you told her, _why_?" The vein grew.

Rangiku puffed out her cheeks in defiance. "It's not like she's gonna go around telling people. I mean she knows how to keep a secret!"

"Yes! Which, obviously, you do not!"

"I have no idea why you're making such a big deal out of this." She rolled her eyes at him, her hands resting on her hips.

"Maybe because she started making fun of us for it!" Ichigo retorted in exasperation, his eyes widening in emphasis.

Rangiku cocked her head to the side, confusion written all over her face. "What?"

Ichigo slapped a hand to his forehead, and ran it down the length of his face. "She practically attacked the whole fucking eleventh division, including Renji. Teasing him and Grimmjow about you-know-who and Kasumi and then-."

"Wait…what did you just say?" Rangiku asked, oblivious to the fact that she had just interrupted Ichigo during a rather crucial moment. The said male looked to the ceiling as if asking it for help before regarding Rangiku again.

"I said she was making fun of the whole division and-."

"I got that part Ichigo, can you just skip to the part 'bout Renji and Grimmjow."

The vein pulsated. "Can you not interrupt me?"

"Ichigo."

Ichigo sighed as he resisted the sudden urge to choke Matsumoto. "She was teasing Renji about you-know-who and Grimmjow 'bout Kasumi, at least I think-."

"Well you thought wrong." Rangiku stared dully at Ichigo, as if she'd heard this information a thousand times to many. "Contrary to popular belief Grimmjow is infact, not interested in Kasumi soon-to-be Hisagi."

Orange brows furrowed. "And how do you know this?"

"My sources." She answered as if it were the most obvious thing ever. The vein threatened to pop.

"Girls and their fucking sources! What the fuck?" Ichigo practically shouted, angrily throwing his hands up in the air.

The vein in Rangiku's forehead appeared. "Hey idiot! If your gonna keep dropping the F-bomb in every damn thing you say then this conversation is over! Now calm your ass down, unless you want me to do it." She added, her voice taking on a more seductive undertone.

Ichigo's face reddened and instantly he quieted down. "Well if it's not Takahashi then who the fu-, I mean hell, is it?" He asked, his curiosity getting the better of him.

Rangiku scrutinized Ichigo's genuinely baffled face. "You seriously don't know?" He shook his head in response, waiting with thin patience for the answer, but Rangiku just shook her head. "I can't believe you don't know, I mean he is in your division and you talk to him everyday."

"We talk but not 'bout personal stuff. I care about Grimmjow's romantic interests as much as you care about Jiruga." Rangiku's gaze darkened instantly and Ichigo nodded in affirmation. "Exactly."

"Fair enough." She replied, ignoring his last remark. "But come on, you must have some clue as to who it is." However, one look at Ichigo's face told her otherwise, she sighed heavily as he continued to stare at her. Slowly Rangiku's eyes moved to her right, Ichigo followed her gaze and his hazel irises fell on the hot pink loveseat where Nel was comforting Chizuru, who looked quite happy.

His eyes flickered back to Rangiku, wide as saucers. "Chizuru?" He whispered in disbelief. The lesbian? No fucking way! Rangiku rolled her eyes upward before giving Ichigo a nice smack across the head. "Ow! What the fuck was that for?"

"Baka! It's not Chizuru you dumbo!" She hissed as she gripped her now stinging hand. Dumbass had a fucking hard head. Holy shit.

"Well then who the heck is it?" Ichigo asked impatiently as he rubbed the side of his head. Holy shit. Bitch could fucking hit. Who knew?

"Nel!" Rangiku answered quietly, careful not to let the others overhear.

"Nel!" Ichigo squawked in surprise before slapping a hand to his mouth.

"Yes?" The teal-haired girl glanced up in concern.

"Oh. Uh. Nothing!" Ichigo replied, a little too gaily, before turning back to Rangiku, whose vein was throbbing violently.

"You dumbass!" She cried, this time bringing her fist down on top of his head. "Do you have any idea what would happen to me if she found out? I'd be killed. Killed!"

"Ow! I'm sorry. I'm sorry." The young man exclaimed as he vigorously rubbed his aching head. Fucking shit. His headache was back. _Dammit Rangiku._

"Quiet down will you? Ulquiorra is looking at us!" Ichigo looked to his left to find Ulquiorra, who was indeed staring at them. The pale man nodded his head in acknowledgement and Ichigo returned it graciously.

"Are you sure its Nel?" Ichigo asked once he turned back to Rangiku, his face the definition of disbelief.

"I'm positive."

"Who told you?"

"Oh I might as well tell you." She shrugged before glancing around; making sure no one was listening. "Izuru and Shuhei."

Ichigo's eyes widened. "Kira and Hisagi? How the hell did they find out?"

Rangiku giggled. "Apparently Grimmjow talks a lot when he's drunk and I mean, a lot. Izuru said it happened 'bout a week ago. He was running errands for Gin and stopped by the bar to talk to Shuhei 'bout something important. Grimmjow was there too, drinking it up of course, and he just started talking to them. Shuhei said you could tell he was out of it, and he just kept talking about Nel. Saying things like: 'she's so beautiful' and 'she's so nice' and-."

"That doesn't sound like Grimmjow." Ichigo's eyes narrowed and he shook his head.

"_And_," Rangiku emphasized, ignoring Ichigo's last comment. "Quote, unquote. 'I wanna fuck her so bad.'"

"Okay now _that_ sounds more like Grimmjow."

"My point exactly." She nodded as a sly smile appeared on her lips. "Anyway, apparently his comments started to get, well, more detailed. So Shuhei passed him a certain type of drink to sober him up. It worked and he was fine…but he doesn't remember saying any of it."

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Of course he wouldn't."

"Yeah, but after he sobered up, he walked away. Then that night, after work, Shuhei, Izuru, Kasumi and I went out to eat, and that's when I found out." Rangiku recalled; a finger placed delicately on her chin as she remembered.

"Alright. Sounds possible. So how, I ask you, does my sister fit into all of this?" The vein was back.

"Oh! Karin. Um…let's see. She showed up the next day at the office. That was Sunday, and even though we didn't have work I had to fill out some paperwork for Taichou. So Karin showed up, something 'bout going out with Taichou and he wasn't back yet from running errands so we just talked and that's when everything kinda just came…out…ehehehehe." Rangiku giggled nervously as she brought a hand up to the back of her head, rubbing it guiltily.

"Rangiku!" Ichigo shouted, his face turning the color of Renji's hair.

"What? It's not like it's that big of a deal. Really Ichigo." She puffed hotly, her hands resting on her hips.

Ichigo's eyes almost popped out of his head. "What? Not _that _big of a deal? Are you on drugs?"

She glanced at him, looking thoughtful for a moment. "Well now that you mention it I-."

"No. No! I don't want to know! Just stop! Stop!" He almost yelled, covering his ears with his hands.

Rangiku smirked. "Something wrong Ichigo?"

He glared reproachfully at her. "Yes…my head is pounding."

"Oh! Want me to give it a kiss, it'll make you feel better…" She smiled mischievously before puckering her lips and leaning towards him.

"No! No! I don't want a kiss!" Ichigo blushed furiously as he held his hands out, barely keeping the woman at bay.

"Oh! You're blushing! You totally want one! Don't lie."

"No! No, Rangiku! I don't!"

"You sure?" She asked seductively as she wiggled her eyebrows at him.

He shuddered. "Yes, I'm positive."

"Alright, fine. But you don't know what your missin'." Her sly smile made him shiver.

"Trust me, I think I do. Anyway just don't tell my sister anything anymore. I don't wanna get killed just cause you couldn't keep your mouth shut." He muttered, his blush dissipating and his face taking on a more serious expression.

Rangiku's eyebrows shot up. "Who would kill you?"

"You'd be surprised." He grunted back, his eyes shifting towards the door.

"Maybe. Maybe not." She shrugged before yawning and stretching her arms. "Anyway, how did the last blind date go?"

Ichigo's eye twitched. "That bad huh?"

"I'm never listening to Renji again." He shook his head, arms crossed indignantly over his chest.

"Well what happened? Is she ugly or something? What's her name?"

"I don't know her name."

Rangiku's eyes widened. "What? How do you not know her name?"

"She stormed out of the restaurant before I could find out!" He answered crossly, the events of the night flashing through his mind. Ichigo Kurosaki was not a man that liked to be walked out on, especially by some stubborn, arrogant, evil midget!

The eyes bulged. "And what did you do to make her do that?"

Ichigo shrugged indifferently. It wasn't like he had said anything that bad. "I just said something about her height and-."

The jaw dropped. "You insulted her?"

"No! I didn't insult her! I just told her she was pretty short and-."

"No wonder your single! You're an idiot!"

"Well she was short!" Ichigo looked alarmed as the vein in Rangiku's forehead bulged to the point of explosive.

"That isn't the point! Telling her she's too short is like telling you you're a freak cause you have orange hair!"

Ichigo growled. "I am not a freak!"

"Exactly!" Rangiku huffed in annoyance, her cheeks full of air. "What else happened?" She added once she was calm.

"Well I told her she was short and then-." Ichigo sighed heavily. "She made fun of my hair."

Something in Rangiku's eyes sparked, and she stifled a giggle. "Oh did she now? Sounds like she knows what she's doing. And how did the ol' pride take it?"

He grumbled something incoherently and she laughed aloud. "Oh! The pride was wounded! Hahahaha."

"It's not funny."

"Oh really? I think it's hilarious." She laughed again at his expression.

Ichigo's vein twitched. "Anyway, after she called me Carrot I-."

"She called you CARROT? Ahahahahahahahahaha!" Rangiku cried as she succumbed to fits of uncontrollable laughter. "Carrot? Hahahaha! That's genius! Can I meet this girl? Oh Lord, we'd be great friends. Hahahaha, carrot!"

Ichigo raised an eyebrow. "…You've been drinking…haven't you?"

"Oh just a bit! It really doesn't matter." She waved it away dismissively, a large smile on her face. "Now go back to the part about…c-carrot…pfff hahahahahahahahaha."

He closed his eyes in annoyance, trying to ignore his pounding headache and the now throbbing vein. "If your going to keep laughing, I'm gonna leave."

"Alright. Alright. I'm okay. I'm okay." She panted, taking deep, generous breaths.

Once he was sure she was…all right, Ichigo continued. "After she called me Carrot, I exploded and we got in a yelling match. Before I knew it, she'd grabbed her coat and was out the door. Thank God."

"I'm gonna have to find Renji after work. I gotta meet this girl. Oh jeez." Rangiku said, wiping tears out of her eyes. "So you never answered my question. Was she ugly?"

Ichigo narrowed his eyes at her. "No. She was whatever."

"Ooooh. So she _was_ pretty. Oh you fucked up bad Ichi. Bad." She chuckled, wiggling her eyebrows at him. He grimaced.

"Yeah so she was pretty, but that doesn't matter. Girl was a crazy bitch. Glad I don't have to deal with her." He turned away indignantly; trying to save what little pride he had left.

Something glistened in Rangiku's eyes, the same spark that had been there only a few minutes before, but this one was brighter, stronger, and rather unnerving. "You never know Ichigo. It's a small world. You might see her again."

"Yeah right." Ichigo replied as he rolled his own eyes. Not in a million years would that ever happen…

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**Oooo the suspense. Lool. So that's the end of the chapter. Hope you all liked it, if you did, send a review. If you didn't, send a review stating why, though if you could put it politely that would be fantastic. Remember, the couples are subject to change. Which makes me ask another question. Grimmjow and Nel. What do you think of those two? Personally I'm not sure yet if I want them together, but I don't know what all of you want. So let me know in a review, if you like them together alright. If you don't though, could you tell me the person you like them with? Give me some ideas to juggle, you know what I mean. **

**Anyway, thanks a bunch for reading. And if you have the time, review please. ^^ Thanks, until next week! :D**


	3. It's A Small World After All

******A/N: W********oot! Finally got done with the new chappie, and I'm only 2 hours late of my deadline... lool. Sorry guys, but you wouldn't believe the kinda crap I had all week, so freaking busy, and I had to proofread the story before I put it up. Couldn't give you guys some kinda weird...shit...thing...lool XD. Anyway, thanks to everyone who's read, reviewed, favorited, alerted, etc, etc. lool. You guys are freaking awesome! :D. Also special thanks to allen caldeni, for putting me under everything, even his favorite authors, though I've only written really one good story (this one) and its not even close to done yet _. lool. And Serrocco for all the awesome ideas! :D. And La Enana for leaving me the funniest reviews that totally make my day. lool XD. But thanks everyone for reading and if you wouldn't mind reviewing I would freaking love you forever! lool XD**

**Oh quick note. Farther down in the story Rukia has a moment where she's like quarreling with herself I guess you can say, she's not arguing with Sode no Shirayuki, but herself. Ya know how it is when your mad at yourself and you start arguing with yourself...or is that just me? lool XD. Well anyway that part's in bold and italic, so just warning you beforehand so your not all like WTF IS THIS? hahahaha XD. **

**I can't think of anything else to say so onto the disclaimer! (btw sorry if I'm not making any sense, its 2 in the freaking morning and I am so freakishly tired it hurts _) lool.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, if I did there'd be no room in my closet for clothes...**

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Chapter Three: It's A Small World After All

"Ichigo!"

Ichigo looked up to see Urahara waving enthusiastically at him from across the room, his other hand weighted down by the money that was now being shoved into it from the other bouncers. Yoruichi stood next to him, arms across her chest as she barked orders at the small group, something 'bout Grimmjow paying up. Ichigo approached them at his normal, snail-like pace, looking and feeling as bored as ever. He had just been kicked out of the back room; the others break time had ended, and now he was forced to go back to his uneventful duties…boring.

"Urahara." He said lazily as he approached the group. Said man grinned widely at him, Urahara was always too happy.

"Ichigo! How's it goin'?"

"Alright." The strawberry shrugged as he eyed the growing pile of money in Urahara's hand. "I miss something?"

"He won the bet." Chad said quietly as Grimmjow smacked the last bill onto Urahara's outstretched hand, the old coot crying out in response.

"Now Grimm! Don't be mean!" The older man whined as he tried to soothe his now stinging hand.

"Shuddap ya greedy asshole!" He yelled, shaking his fist at the blonde bastard.

"Watch it Jaegerjaquez." Zaraki warned earning him a growl from the blue-haired whore.

"Whatever." He spat, grabbing another bottle of sake off Michiru's tray as she zoomed past before leaning against the wall.

Ichigo watched all of this with scarce interest, looking around at the group he noticed someone was missing. "Where's Abarai?"

"The back." Yoruichi grinned, her thumb jutting towards the two double doors behind the bar. "You didn't see him when you left?"

"No." Ichigo shook his head making her sigh in exasperation.

"He's probably flirting it up with Arisawa in the kitchen, I'll be back." She sighed again before striding across the room towards the bar.

"And don't forget to tell him he owes me!" Urahara's cry turned to a chuckle as Yoruichi flipped him off. "Maybe later!" She shook her head before laughing, and giving him a quick wink, disappeared into the kitchen. "Beautiful…isn't she?"

Ichigo scoffed. "Yeah, and I still have no fucking idea as to how you got her."

"Well it wasn't easy, for one thing, but that's a story for another day. Now onto more pressing matters, my money?" Urahara held out his hand expectantly, his eyes shining as he stared at the orange head.

"Huh?"

"Ichigo, I won the bet remember? Now pay up, I haven't got all day." He replied lazily as he fanned himself.

"I already put my money in the pot; Zaraki should've given it all to you." Ichigo rolled his eyes, that damn fan was so fucking annoying.

Urahara shook his head, a mischievous smile stretching across his face. "Nope. Not good enough. You need to pay up another thirty."

"Wha? Why the fuck should I?"

"Now, now Ichigo. I doubt you want the information you told Yoruichi earlier to be passed around the house."

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh something 'bout still being a virgin…"

"What? I already told Yoruichi that I lost it."

"Oh but Ichigo, the truth is so easy to manipulate, and knowing your dad, he'll only believe the first thing he hears."

"You wouldn't." Urahara didn't speak, only smirked happily at Ichigo as he continued to fan himself with that ridiculous fan. Ichigo growled as he extracted the extra thirty from his pocket, grumbling about evil old men with hats, clogs, and fans.

Urahara just smiled as Ichigo shoved the money into his hands. "Oh don't feel so bad Ichigo, everyone had to pay up extra, 'specially Grimmjow." He chuckled behind his fan as Grimmjow openly glared at him, looking positively murderous.

"Better get back to yer post _manager_ or my fist might start actin' on its own."

"Ooooh. So scary!" Urahara whispered dramatically, his face taking on a comical expression. Grimmjow's anger skyrocketed and Urahara, sensing that anger, squeaked in response before running full speed to the opposite side of the room. "Bye Ichigo! See you later!"

"Get back here ya son of a bitch!" Grimmjow yelled, about to take up chase; but Zaraki pulled him back. "Zaraki!"

"Calm down Jaegerjaquez. Now."

"Zaraki-."

"Now."

"Fucking shit." He sighed in defeat, Zaraki's wicked grin sending chills down his spine. As much as he wanted to run off and kill the old man with the hat, he still wanted to keep his life. He sighed again, about to turn around when a high voice made him glance back.

"Blueberry! How could you say such horrible words? You should be ashamed of yourself!" Yachiru scolded, glaring at him from her perch atop Zaraki's shoulder. _When did she get there?_ Ichigo thought, shaking his head as he stared at the little girl. _Probably while I was in the back room or something…_ His thoughts trailed off as his interest disappeared.

Grimmjow's vein throbbed. "What did ya call me brat?"

"Blueberry! That's your name."

"My name is Grimmjow ya dumb bitch! Now get down here so I can strangle you!" He snarled as he attempted to snatch her. Yachiru just stuck her tongue out and proceeded to make funny faces, which only made the asshole angrier, if that was even possible.

The others simply ignored them, seeing as how it happened almost every day they were used to the two's constant arguments, which always seemed to revolve around Grimmjow's pet name, but of course the name was never changed, much to Grimmjow's dismay. Ichigo returned back to his designated spot on the wall, still bored out of his mind. Adjusting his lean figure, he made himself more comfortable before allowing himself to drift off into a light sleep.

"Ichi!" Ichigo's eyes flew open as something loud pierced through his ear canal, he almost screamed when he felt something jump on his head. Looking up he came face to face with Yachiru Kusajishi, who was smiling happily down at him. His vein pulsed.

"What…are you doing?" He asked, trying to keep his voice under control.

"Standing on your head." The vein throbbed.

He grit his teeth. Usually he had much patience when it came to the little girl, but not today. Not when he had the biggest headache in the history of headaches and she was only making it worse by _standing_ on his _head. _"Get. Off. Now."

"But-."

"Now Yachiru!"

"Ooh fine!" She huffed, jumping down from his head and turning to face him.

He stared at her, suppressing a glare when she smiled happily at him. "What did I tell you 'bout jumpin' on my head?"

"Sorry, I forgot." She confessed; her grin widening as she stared at the throbbing vein in his head.

"That's what you always say."

"Well I always forget."

"Whatever." Ichigo rolled his eyes, turning away from the hyperactive little girl. He was just about to return to his original position when he heard someone calling him, he sighed involuntarily. Why the hell did everyone always want to talk to him?

"Ichigo!" Keigo cried as he sprinted across the room towards them, his waiter's smock flapping around in his hand. Ichigo casually stepped to the side, narrowly missing Keigo's bear hug, the poor young man instead making contact with the hard wall.

"What do you want?" Came Ichigo's exasperated reply.

"Ow…" Keigo sniffed, tearing up as he rubbed his aching nose. "Why'd you move?"

"What do you want?" The strawberry asked again, choosing to ignore the question.

Keigo beamed, instantly forgetting about his injured nose. "Did ya hear about the new whore?"

Ichigo raised an eyebrow. "Yeah…what about her…?"

"So it is a girl? Sweet! I wonder what she looks like. If she's a whore than she has to be sexy and quite voluptuous too. Maybe I'll get lucky and she'll be like Inoue's twin! I wonder if she's tall or short, well as long as she's shorter than me it's fine…" The perverted bastard rambled on and on, and with each ramble; Ichigo lost more interest and more patience.

"Keigo."

"Or better yet, maybe she'll be like a younger version of Harribel or Matsumoto, oh now wouldn't that be wonderful. I'll have to grab her attention first; I'll make a plan with Mizuiro…"

"Keigo."

"Now what side would she like? Seductive Keigo? Sweet Keigo. Sensitive Keigo. Awesome Keigo."

"Keigo."

"Sexy Keigo. Shy Keigo. Outgoing Keigo."

Ichigo's patience level was at its brink. "Keigo, who said she would even want you?"

Keigo rolled his eyes before gesturing to himself, an eyebrow rising as he did so. "Oh come on Ichigo. Who wouldn't want a piece of the Keigo?"

"I wouldn't." Ryo stated as she passed by the group, taking some sake bottles off her tray and handing them to Kensei, Kenpachi, and Grimmjow. An argument immediately ensued as Yachiru demanded to have some and Zaraki refused. "I'm gonna warn that girl 'bout you Asano, and if she's smart, she'll ignore you."

"Hey Ryo! That's not nice!"

"I'm not known for being nice Keigo. Call me if you guys want more." She nodded to the sake bottles before walking briskly away. Keigo just glared at her retreating form before turning back to Chad and Ichigo.

"So mean…" He grumbled as he crossed his arms over his chest defiantly. "Ah whatever. She only says that cause she's a lesbian."

"I'm a WHAT?"

"Oh shit. Ah damn, look at the time well, it's my designated time to use the restroom, can't be late for that nope, see you guys after work, bye!" Keigo said hurriedly, glancing at his wrist which, coincidentally, was bare. After shouting the last part he turned and gave the others a small wave before taking off to the kitchen.

"You forget Keigo. Back in high school, I was the track star. Running the hundred-meter dash in twelve seconds. You can't run from me and you know it!" Ryo cried as she shoved her tray into Michiru's hands and then chased after Asano at lightening speed, her shoes kicking up trails of dust.

The others watched as the two sped away from each other, Keigo crying as he was caught by Ryo and thrown into the kitchen. _Idiot. _Ichigo thought as he closed his eyes. _He always gets caught._ Without meaning to he began to dose off, but awoke when a loud voice entered his ear canal.

"Uryu!" Ichigo's eyes snapped open, the hazel irises instantly resting on Chad who was waving the cape-wearing dweeb over.

"Hey guys. What's up?" He asked casually as he adjusted his glasses.

"Orihime was looking for you earlier." Chad said his voice barely above a whisper.

Ishida's eyes widened in alarm. "She was? What for?"

"Don't get excited. You just forgot your midnight snack at home." Ichigo replied in a bored tone. _What time is it? _He thought as he looked down at his wrist, his watch silently ticking away. _One. Fucking shit I wanna get outta here._

Uryu visibly paled, which was amazing seeing as how he was practically super white to begin with. "Oh…where is it?"

"Behind the bar. Rose is keeping an eye on it." Chad answered quietly, repositioning himself on the wall.

"Oh. Alright. I'll find a way to dispose of it later then." He sighed softly as he removed his Iphone from his pocket and began to sort through the information displayed on the screen. "We have a couple of Newbies. The rest, as you probably already figured, are regulars."

"Yeah, yeah. We got that part. So…anyone worth watching?" Ichigo inquired in his usual impatient manner. Man Ishida could beat 'round a bush.

"Not really, except for this guy by the name of…Yammy Riyalgo. His criminal record is quite detailed, but seeing as how he hasn't given you guys any trouble yet…" Uryu trailed off as he glanced back over his shoulder at the rather large man sitting by himself at a table.

Grimmjow followed his gaze and grinned wickedly, the action making Ikkaku laugh aloud. "Excited, Jaegerjaquez?"

"Fuck yea. I fuckin' dare the bitch ta do something." His grin widened, the sadistic smile making Yachiru shrink back on Zaraki's shoulder.

Uryu sighed. "As animalistic as ever I see."

"What's that supposed ta mean Four-Eyes?" Grimmjow challenged, turning on the lanky young man. Ishida's eyes widened and then narrowed, but before he could retort, Yachiru cut in.

"Blueberry!" She scolded, her earlier fear forgotten as she wagged a finger in front of Grimmjow's face. "You got it all wrong! His name is Pencil! Isn't that right Pencil?" She turned to Uryu, whose jaw was almost touching the floor.

"My name is not Pencil!" He cried, enunciating every word just so it'd be clear. Apparently it wasn't.

Yachiru stuck her tongue out at him. "Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Argh! Forget it. I am twenty-one years old and I am _not_ going to get into an argument with a little girl." He declared irritably, his eye twitching behind his glasses.

Yachiru grinned widely. "Ha! I win, Pencil!"

"Tch, why you!" But Yachiru was already gone, disappearing behind Zaraki's back and there was no way in hell Ishida was gonna go after her. He grumbled something incoherent before realizing that the others were laughing at him.

"P-Pencil! Ahahahahaha." Grimmjow said between gulps of air making Ichigo laugh harder. Uryu turned on the two young men, glaring daggers at their doubled-over forms.

"At least I'm not named after a fruit."

"Shaddup!" They both yelled in unison, growls replacing their earlier laughter.

"You two are so juvenile." Ishida rolled his eyes just as his phone gave off a loud beep. "Shit. I gotta get back to Kurotsuchi before he chews my ass out. Alright, I'll see you guys after work."

"Wait! Uryu!" Ichigo called, his anger long forgotten.

He turned back around to face the group, his fingers moving across the touch screen of his phone at lightning speed. "What?"

"Jiruga's back."

Uryu's shoulders automatically stiffened before relaxing. The expression on his face the only indication he had heard what Ichigo said at all. "Yeah…I know. Did you…?"

"Yeah. I checked on her. She's doing fine." Ichigo nodded his head, his hands stuffed in his pockets.

"Alright good. Well I got to get back. Keep an eye on her will you? And text me if anything comes up. See you guys after work." He called over his shoulder before sprinting out of the club, his ridiculous little mini-cape flying behind him.

Ichigo sighed as the next girl came on stage. Mila-Rose. Quickly, he averted his eyes to another spot in the room. He wouldn't admit it to anyone, but watching the girls' strip and pole dance made him very, very uncomfortable. So in most moments, unless he was hopeless smashed, he didn't like to watch. As he tried to drown out the loud music, he couldn't help but notice Yammy and some shady lookin' character chatting it up. Before he could even blink, the guy had shoved some money at Yammy, in exchange for a bag of…drugs. Most definitely drugs. Ichigo grinned evilly, finally something to do. As he detached himself from the wall he grabbed Grimmjow's attention.

"Where do ya think yer going?" The blue-haired bitch raised an eyebrow as Ichigo started to walk away.

The strawberry turned around, his smile unnerving Grimmjow. Since when did Ichigo look so happy…unless…"Riyalgo. Table eight. Drugs. You comin' or what?"

Grimmjow's grin easily rivaled Ichigo's. "Oh fuck yea!"

* * *

Rukia looked out the window as they drove down the street, the world flashing by in a mixture of bright colors and large, foreboding buildings. She sighed. They were almost there. Just a few more minutes and she'd be standing in front. Byakuya had already briefed her on what was going to happen. She'd arrive, a woman by the name of Yoruichi Shihoin was going to take her inside and introduce her to the owner and then the rest of the boss's of the remaining twelve groups. Then she would meet everyone, at the same time (great), and then she'd go through the rest of the standards, learn the rules, where she was working (her station), and all the other boring stuff she didn't care about. Really, this was turning out to be more trouble than it was worth.

"Miss Rukia. Were here." Rukia looked up to see her door open and her driver waiting patiently outside. Gathering up all the courage she could muster, she stepped out of the car and looked at the building in front of her. It was large and gray and looked relatively boring. It had numerous windows, which cast down a yellowish glow of light onto the street, and wide glass doors. It looked like an ordinary business building; in fact it was an ordinary business building. She turned to her driver, uncertainty crossing her delicate yet stern features.

"Rikichi…is this the club?"

The young man chuckled politely. "No miss. This is the company headquarters. This is where you'll meet Yamamoto and everyone else. You'll learn protocol and regulations at the actual club after the meeting."

"Oh…I see." She acknowledged quietly. Nice that someone found the need to tell her _now._

"C'mon. I'll walk you to the front. Yoruichi-san should be inside the lobby."

"Yes…" She nodded as she followed him up the stairs and through the door, taking in her surroundings as she went. The inside of the headquarters was lavish and breathtakingly beautiful, so beautiful that Rukia couldn't help but stare in wonder, her mouth shaping into a perfect _O_. Following Rikichi, she stepped into what must have been the lobby and felt her breath hitch in her throat. The room was gorgeous, with dark brown carpet spread across the floor and the wallpaper an amazing mixture of yellow and brown. There was a fountain in the middle of the room made out of white marble and on it's surface was carved sculptures of flowers in great detail. Surrounding the fountain were dozens of comfy looking white sofas, there plush exteriors reminding Rukia of her Chappy stuffed animal at home. The room was empty except for the two of them and one other person lying on the couch farthest from where they were standing.

It seemed to be a male, and he appeared to be sleeping but she couldn't exactly tell since there was a magazine lying across his face, hiding his identity. Rikichi cleared his throat and the said male sat up quickly, sleep forgotten as the magazine fell and hit the ground with a soft _plop_. Rukia's eyes widened as she took in the familiar bright red hair and face covered in various tattoos.

"Renji!" She cried, sprinting towards him with her arms open. It was nice to see someone familiar.

"Rukia!" He shouted; laughing as she practically catapulted herself into his arms. "It's been awhile. How are you?"

Rukia scoffed, glancing back up at him like he should've already known the answer. "What do you think?"

"Well you look cranky, that's for-." He started, but a nice placed kick to the shin stopped him. "Ow!"

"Asshole." She muttered as he continued to rub his abused leg.

"Holy shit Rukia! You didn't have to fucking hit me." He whined pathetically, making her roll her eyes.

"Sure." She rolled her eyes again as he righted himself, straightening his shirt as he stood. He turned to Rikichi and inclined his head, the young man nodded before walking out of the lobby and taking an immediate right down a long corridor. "So, tell me about this place."

"It's a place." Renji shrugged indifferently as he steered her out of the room and out into a long hallway, turning her left. "I mean, it's nice if that's what you're wondering."

"So it isn't like…most whore houses?" She asked her nose crinkling as she thought of the many she'd seen in movies. They were usually run-down, dirty, and cramped.

Renji laughed. "No. The house is clean, large, and cozy. Hard to believe but it's the truth. Yamamoto likes to keep his workers happy and comfortable and his customers coming back for more."

"That's gross." Rukia shuddered, her face crunching up in disgust.

"That's life." He smirked before glancing down at her again. "But really, this place isn't all that bad. The pay's great, the hours are good, the breaks are long, and-."

"You have to fuck dirty, old men." She interrupted dryly, watching with satisfaction as Renji went rigid.

He looked at her scornfully. "No. You don't have to fuck dirty, old…wait never mind…I guess you do." He turned away, looking thoughtfully at the ceiling.

"I knew it."

Renji rolled his eyes towards the ceiling before looking back at her. "Seriously Rukia, it isn't that bad. The employees are cool, the bosses are…mostly nice, and the customers could be a whole lot worse. Trust me; I actually think you'll like it here."

Rukia snorted. "Yeah right. What the hell is there to like when your job title says whore?"

"It's prostitute, Rukia. Not whore, _prostitute_." He enunciated the last word making her roll her eyes.

"Yeah, whatever." She countered quietly as she crossed her arms, looking for a way to change the subject. "So…where are we going? I thought someone by the name of Yoruichi was going to show me around."

"Don't worry, she still is. She had some important stuff to do or something, so she asked me to meet with you cause I know you and all." He shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm taking you to meet the other employees, she's taking you to see Yamamoto and the other bosses."

"Great." Rukia shuddered. How would the others react to her? Would they like her? Her hold on her arms tightened, it was a little scary just thinking about it. She already knew about some of the employees from Renji, and they seemed like they'd be nice. There was some guy named something Hisagi and then his girlfriend, Kasumi. Then a woman named Rangiku, and some blonde guy named Izuru. Oh and then there was that chick he couldn't stop talking about…what was her name? Started with a T, right? Tsukiko? No. Tsumi? No. Taki? No… "Hey Renji."

"Yeah?" He asked, glancing over his shoulder at her. It was the first time she had spoken in a good five minutes.

"What's the name of that girl you like again? Taki…or something?" She asked casually, looking around the lavish hallway before sending him a sideways glance.

Renji quickly turned away from her; intent on hiding the blush that was making its way up his neck. "You mean Tatsuki?" He corrected quietly as Rukia beamed.

"Yep." She snickered, sending him a sly look that only confirmed her suspicions, he was blushing like crazy. "Oh! Renji! Is that a blush I see?"

"Rukia."

"Oh it is! Who would've thought?" She chortled quietly when he turned away, mumbling incoherently. "C'mon Renji. You can't hide it from me and you know it."

He snorted as he tilted his head to the side to glare at her. "Well I can try."

"Try and _fail_ you will." The expression on his face made her laugh aloud, the soft sound echoing off the walls of the corridor.

"You just love making fun of me, don't you?" He asked, his face taking on a sour expression which just succeeded in making Rukia grin.

"Who said I'm making fun?"

"Whatever Rukia."

She chuckled in response. "Defeated already? Depressing." His eye twitched and she stifled another laugh. "So…this Tatsuki girl. You like her?"

"…Yeah…" He whispered sheepishly before looking away again.

"And…? Have you asked her out yet?" She looked to him expectantly, but he just shook his head. "Well why not?"

"…Complications." He answered after a long pause. Rukia rolled her eyes at him.

"If not asking because you're nervous of rejection is a complication then you-."

"No! That's not it. Well that is it, but that's not the only complication." He said hurriedly, his voice rising rapidly as she stared at him, her facial expression telling him she didn't believe a damn thing he was saying, which she didn't.

She cocked her head to the side, eyeing him thoughtfully. "And what is…the other complication?"

He sighed as he turned away from her, his shoulders slumping in defeat. "Yamamoto."

Rukia stared at him, perplexed. "The owner? Why would he care?"

"I don't know. The old man is nuts." Renji shrugged as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. "He's got this strange policy, you'll probably see it later, one of the many papers you have to sign. But the policy says that you can't date or marry anyone until you have permission from Yamamoto himself."

"What?" She spluttered, her eyes widening in shock. "That's stupid!"

"Well that's Yamamoto for you." He shrugged before turning back around to face her. "And before you ask, no I haven't asked him yet." He added just as she opened her mouth, she narrowed her eyes at him before closing it.

"So why haven't you?" She asked a few minutes later, they were still in that same corridor. _How fucking long is this thing? My God, I'm gonna be old by the time we get to the end!_

"I'm still waiting for him to calm down from the last request." He replied, snapping her out of her thoughts. She glanced up at him curiously, but he looked serious enough.

"Last request?"

"Yeah. Ishida Uryu, he's in Division Twelve and works as an informant and financial supporter. Anyway, he asked Yamamoto if he could marry Inoue Orihime, an A-class _prostitute_," He enunciated the last word making Rukia roll her eyes. Prostitute, whore. Same damn thing. "Well Yamamoto kinda lost it, well he's already lost it, but with that request I guess you could say he just lost more of it. Anyway, he kinda lost his temper and then demanded Orihime come and when Ishida asked her to marry him and she said yes, well he got even madder."

She gulped. "How mad we talkin'?"

"Mad enough to destroy one of the walls in his office. Inoue is like his prize, next to Rangiku, and Harribel. He was fucking pissed when she said yes." He shrugged again, like this wasn't anything new. "But that's Yamamoto for you."

"Well did he say yes?" She asked impatiently, the thought of a crazy, old, pervert making her rather uncomfortable, not to mention nervous.

Renji snorted, stuffing his hands back in his pockets. "Yeah he did. He didn't want to make Inoue unhappy or Ishida for that matter, but he's still pissed about it, and it's been a good couple months."

"Hmmm." Rukia hummed as she stared at the ceiling thoughtfully. "Why is he so…weird about his workers marrying?"

"I think its cause he doesn't want us to leave. 'Specially the prostitutes cause we make him the most money. That and there's the chance of Inoue getting pregnant, and then she really can't work, at all. Yeah, I think he's just afraid of her not being able to work anymore, or of her leaving cause she wants to start a 'family'." He replied matter-of-factly.

"Well in a way that's understandable, but he really can't expect you guys to stick around forever." She frowned at the idea; at least she wouldn't be there forever. "Wait, Renji. You just said that he's scared of this…Orihime girl getting pregnant, isn't there already a chance she might considering she's a whore?"

"Prostitute! Jeez Rukia." Renji huffed in indignation.

She rolled her eyes, making the large vein in his head appear. "Just answer the question Renji."

He paused for a brief moment before opening his mouth again. "There's always a chance she could get pregnant, but believe it or not the chances are lower here. In all the years this place has been open, we've never had a pregnancy and we've never gotten anyone else pregnant."

Rukia's eyes widened, maybe there was some hope after all. "How's that?"

"Group Four. They're the support group for the whole house. They 'provide adequate equipment for employees,' I think that's their official job description. Something like that anyway. But yeah, they have everything; birth control, condoms, morning-after pills, anything and everything. Along with the thirteenth and first divisions, they're probably the most important. The whole house depends on them."

"Hmmm. Interesting…"

"Yep." He turned to smile at her and then his face lit up, as if he remembered something. "Hey, so how'd the date go?"

Rukia's expression darkened. "You're an asshole."

"W-What? Me?" Renji stuttered, obviously taken aback.

"Yes you!" She spat, glaring reproachfully at him. "How could you set me up with some orange haired freak! Who the hell has orange hair anyway?" **Though he was pretty hot, gotta admit Rukia.**_ I won't admit to anything, he was whatever. _**He was hot and you fucking know it. **_Yeah, whatever._

"Three of our employees have orange hair."

"Oh…well whatever. That doesn't matter. Anyway, you should be lucky I'm not choking the living shit outta you right now." She hissed venomously, her eyes glaring daggers at him.

Without meaning to, Renji cowered a little. If there was one thing he had learned over the years, it was to never piss Rukia off. "I'm sorry. I didn't know it was going to turn out bad, sheesh."

Rukia's eye twitched. "Bad? Bad? Oh no, it was worse, much, much worse. Atrocious is more like it."

He cocked his head to the side. _Atrocious? What the hell did __**he**__ do? _"Well what happened?"

She sniffed indignantly as she turned away, her voice coming out in a whisper. "The orange haired bitch made fun of my height."

"Well you are short Rukia-." He started, but was interrupted when her small fist made contact with his face. "Ow! Fuck!"

"Jackass! That's not the damn point!" She cried as she resisted the urge to punch him again. "He insulted me. Period."

"Well did he just say you were short? Like what did he say exactly?"

Rukia paused, unsure of whether or not she wanted to tell Renji, the comment was pretty embarrassing, in a way. "…He told me I was vertically challenged."

Renji quickly attempted to stifle a laugh, but failed miserably, resulting in another bone-crushing punch to the face. "Ow! Holy shit, Rukia. Stop punching me!"

"Then stop laughing, you idiot!"

"I'm sorry! I couldn't help it!"

"If you want to keep your balls you _better_ help it!"

"Alright. Alright. I'm sorry. Jeez." He apologized quickly. "So…what happened after he said…that?" He asked once he had calmed down.

Rukia shrugged indifferently. "Oh I just started making fun of his hair."

Renji's eye widened in shock. "You did what?"

"I made fun of his hair, Renji. Really, it isn't that hard to understand." She glanced at him, his shocked expression making her right brow rise. "What?"

"Why would you make fun of his hair?"

"He made fun of my height, I think what I did was justified." She replied curtly as she folded her arms across her chest.

Renji groaned, his left hand coming up to rub his temple. "Rukia. You don't make fun of a guy's hair."

"And you of all people know not to make fun of my height." She shot back irritably, her arms falling back to swing at her side. "Anyway, after that he called me Midget and then I called him Carrot-Top. And then the insults just went back and forth and finally I had enough of his bullshit so I grabbed my coat and walked out."

"Well today is going to go great." He mumbled, looking away as he crossed his arms over his chest, mimicking Rukia's earlier position.

She cocked her head at him, not sure if she had heard right. "'Scuse me?"

"Nothing." He replied quickly, averting his eyes to the wall beside him. A couple minutes passed as they continued to walk in comfortable silence. Rukia was still thinking about what Renji had said. _Today is going to go great. _What did he mean by that? The sarcasm in his voice was evidence enough; something was going to happen tonight, something that didn't sound very…good. She looked up, opening her mouth as if to voice her concerns when his next words made the question die in her throat. "We're here."

* * *

Ichigo was growing incredibly bored at a rapid pace. He had been standing in the same spot for the past hour and a half, waiting for this new worker to show her face. His interest had long since disappeared, and now the only emotion he was feeling was utter boredom. _It's almost five in the fucking morning, what is this bitch doing?_ He knew she was probably still going through protocol or something, but come on. It was taking forever. Sighing, he looked around the meeting room, which was packed with people.

All the employees were here, shoved into this plain, tiny ass room. Why they all couldn't meet her individually he had no idea, but he wasn't about to voice his suggestions out loud. He glanced at the others who were against the wall with him, all the bouncers, save for Zaraki. He was up in the boss's meeting room, which, coincidentally just happened to be bigger and comfier than this one. _Lucky bastard_. He felt Chad tense next to him and turned, his brows raised.

"Something wrong Chad?"

"It's nothing." The large man replied and Ichigo just shrugged. When Chad said it was nothing, it was almost always nothing.

"Argh! When is this bitch gonna get here? I'm hungry." Grimmjow complained, glancing down at his stomach in distaste. It was making loud, bothersome noises, not to mention it was hurting like hell.

"Dumbass. That's what you get for drinking on an empty stomach." Apache grinned, her teeth bearing menacingly at him.

"Shut up slut." He spat, his eyes narrowing at her in distaste.

She snarled as she stepped forward, her hands curling into fists. "Why you-!"

"Apache." Harribel cut-in, her voice full of authority. Immediately Apache backed down, turning away from Grimmjow to go stand beside Harribel.

"Tch, whatever." The blue-haired bitch shrugged and was about to turn away when something popped up in front of him. "Ack! What the fuck?"

Grimmjow's eyes almost popped out of his head as he stared at Kiyone Kotetsu, who was smiling gleefully up at him. "Are you hungry, Jaegerjaquez-san? Would you like something to eat, I-."

"Get the fuck away from me!" He shouted as he attempted to scramble away from her. "I don't want any of your nasty ass food."

Ichigo rolled his eyes as he stared at the two yelling idiots, well Grimmjow was the one doing most of the yelling, but still. He turned away, tuning the others out in the process. Last thing he wanted was to hear them all argue again, like they did everyday. He closed his eyes as thoughts swam through his mind. _I wonder if Karin and Yuzu are all right. Maybe I should text them…? No. There probably asleep, and if I wake Karin up I'm gonna have to hear her bitch to me. I don't see dad anywhere, he's probably with all the other managers, talking to the new employee or something. The new employee…new whore…_his thoughts faded away as he began to doze off. He really was tired; taking out Yammy had been a lot harder than he had anticipated, even with Grimmjow's help. They both had to be bandaged and it didn't help any that he was hungry too. Oh well, he could always get something at home…

"Ichigo."

At the sound of his name, Ichigo's eyes flew open. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned carefully, groaning at his sore back. Piece of shit. He looked up at Chad, who looked just as exhausted as he was.

"Sorry. I thought you'd want to be awake when Renji introduced you." He said gruffly as he removed his hand from Ichigo's shoulder.

"Thanks." He yawned, shaking his head slightly as his hands came up to rub the sleep from his eyes. It was better for Chad to wake him up anyway, last thing he needed was Rangiku or someone chucking something at him. "She here yet?"

Chad nodded. "She just met the Ninth Division."

"Shit. That close? How long was I out?"

"A good thirty minutes."

"Mmm. Well thanks for waking me up." He whispered, subconsciously stretching as his eyes adjusted once again to the bright lights.

"No problem." Chad nodded again before turning to the left, his eyes settling on Abarai and the young woman walking next to him. Ichigo tried to follow his example, but wasn't tall enough to see, so he instead retreated back into his original position against the wall.

A moment later his ears perked up. He could hear Renji introducing the Kuchiki girl to Division Ten. "This is Matsumoto Rangiku."

"Hey. Nice to meet you."

"His-. Ahem, Takahashi Kasumi." Ichigo mentally slapped himself; God Abarai was a fucking idiot!

"Hello."

"Yadomaru Lisa."

"Nice to meet you."

Ichigo listened as Renji introduced her to the last couple members of the group and then heard him turn to the Eleventh Division. "This is Group Eleven. The bouncers. Their boss is Zaraki Kenpachi. Assistant is Kusajishi Yachiru. And this is Madarame Ikkaku."

"Yo."

"Muguruma Kensei. Jaegerjaquez Grimmjow. Arisawa Tatsuki." They all nodded in greeting, Tatsuki casting Rukia a soft smile. Ichigo sighed; he hated these kinds of meetings with a passion. He remembered when it was him standing next to Yoruichi, sure he knew a bunch of the people from school, but still, having all eyes on you was rather unnerving. And then the questions they would ask you, ridiculous. He remembered when Tetsuzaemon asked him if his hair was natural. It took all of the Eleventh Division to keep him from killing the drunken asshole. Natural. Of course his hair was natural, he had no reason to dye it in the first place, but these people. He subconsciously rolled his eyes; he'd never understand the idiots who worked here. Really, like orange hair was that big of a deal. Rangiku and Orihime had orange hair, but no, they were girls. It was _okay_ for them to have it. Well at least he didn't have blue hair like Grimmjow…

Rukia trailed along beside Renji, an artistically fake smile plastered across her face. Holy shit. There were a lot of people here, more than Rukia had thought possible. Inwardly, she sighed, how many people did she have left? A bajillion? Sounded about right. She still hadn't met her fellow whores, something 'bout standard procedure and going in order with the divisions. What a joke. Why couldn't they just go, everyone meet Rukia, Rukia meet everyone. Then she could just learn everyone's names when she talked to them, life would be so much easier. But no, they just had to lead her through the excruciatingly painful process of meeting everyone at the same time. The hell that would help, how was she supposed to remember all these names? More importantly, why would she want to remember some of these names? These bitches were crazy! Well, some of them, not all. But damn. That pretty boy from squad nine, Yumi-something, crazy! _I bet he spends more hours on his hair then his work_. Then there was that one secretary chick, Hiyori…she was insane! _The look she gave me was practically murderous. How am I gonna work with these people? Sweet Lord. _Rukia thought dramatically.

Great, she was going to work here forever, she could feel it. She was going to die a whore. Oh the depression. The sadness. The-.

"This is Sado Yasutora, but we call him Chad."

"Hello. Nice to meet you." Oh the injustice. The-. Oh confound it all, this is not going to help. She scowled inwardly, remembering her plan of action from earlier. _The plan has just got to work. It has too…_

"And this is Kurosaki Ichigo."

Rukia looked up, the fake smile back on her face. She was about to open her mouth to greet the person when her violet eyes caught sight of the orange hair. The eyes widened in shock before descending to meet those of the young man in front of her, violet met hazel. Oh no…

Ichigo glanced up irritably at the mention of his name, pulled out of his thoughts by Renji, that bastard. He glared at the said bastard before noticing the rather short girl standing next to him. Oh yeah, the new worker…what was he supposed to say again? Hmm. Hello would probably work. He turned, his mouth automatically opening as if to say hi when his eyes met those of the young woman staring at him. His greeting died on his lips as he stared at her, shocked into silence. Realization hit him like a tidal wave, and he opened his mouth just as she did, and at the same time they both uttered one simple word.

"You."

* * *

**Oh. Another cliffhanger, damn me and my addiction to these things. lool. Well just wait till the next chapter, until then, (and if you have the time) write a review, thanks! See you guys next week. ^^ ******


	4. A Friendly Wager

**A/N: Woot! New chappie! Yay! I hope you guys like this one, actually I'm praying you guys like this one, I kinda got writer's block halfway so I was like GAAH! lool XD. But I got it out in the end, which I am happy for ^^ lool. Anyway, thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, alerted, etc, etc. You guys are STILL and always will be FREAKING AWESOME! 3. lool XD. I can't think of anything else to say except for the fact that I am addicted to this new manga I've been reading, its called _The Gentlemen's Alliance Cross _by Arina Tanemura, same person who created _Full Moon_ and _Time Stranger Kyoto_! It's really good and I can't stop reading it , but thats all because Arina Tanemura is amazing, (I love all her books) lool XD. Anyway, enough about me and my boring self. To the story!**

**Warning: In the story Ichigo is tired, drunk, and beyond any rational thinking. So he's kind of an ass at some parts, but he's still the Ichigo we all have come to love! At least the one I have come to love . XD lool. I 3 Ichi, he's just so cool ^^. And Grimm, he's got that pyschotic but totally cool aura about him...and I'm just spouting random crap now. Anyway back to the story! **

**Enjoy reading, and if you would please review at the end, that would be great and I would appreciate it soooooo much! =^_^= So have fun!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach...if I did there'd be no room in my closet for clothes...**

* * *

Chapter Four: A Friendly Wager

"You."

The two looked at each other in shock, eyes wide and mouths threatening to touch the floor. Ichigo couldn't believe it. What was that short, evil midget doing here? There was no way in hell she could be the new worker. This had to be a joke, a sick, sick joke. Or better yet, maybe he was still asleep, still passed out like he had been before, oh how he wished he could go back to before…

Rukia gaped at him in absolute horror. No fucking way. No! No way! This was not happening, not happening! What was this asshole doing here? He didn't work here did he? Fucking shit! How could this happen? How could this happen to her…? Their minds were racing, thoughts flashing by at the speed of sound as they gawked at each other. The room grew quiet as the others stared at them in wonder, not quite comprehending what was happening.

Suddenly a small, tentative voice broke the silence. "Uh…you guys know each other?"

That was more than enough. "You!" Rukia spat, recovering quickly from her earlier state of shock, the familiar expression of anger overpowering her usually serene features. "You asshole! What the fuck are you doing here?"

Ichigo's hand twitched. He wouldn't hit the chick but he was sure ready to punch the fuck out of a wall. "I fucking work here, what the fuck are _you_ doing here?"

"_You_ work _here_? Oh no fucking way." She cried, throwing her hands up in the air before turning away, ready to kick the living shit out of something. The asshole _worked _here? Fucking shit her life was over.

"Yes fucking way! Now answer my damn question, _what_ are you doing here?" He demanded as he took a step forward, hoping to intimidate her into answering his question. It backfired.

"Listen here asshole. I will not answer any of your questions unless I fucking feel like it, and if you're trying to intimidate me it's not working cause I can kick your ass any fucking day of the week. Ya got that Carrot-top?" Ichigo's eye twitched again as he stared down at the midget, his ears picking up the almost silent snickers of his fellow co-workers. How dare the short bitch make fun of him with everyone watching, oh it was fucking on now.

He opened his mouth, barely aware of Rangiku's muttering of 'no fucking way'. "Oh you little piece of-."

"Alright, that's enough outta you two." Renji sighed as he moved to stand in-between them. "Rukia we still got two more divisions, let's go-."

"No Renji." Rukia objected through clenched teeth, her expression hard as she moved her arm up, intent on blocking his path. "I want to hear what the strawberry's gotta say. That is what your name means, right _Ichigo_?"

"It means 'he who protects' fucking shit why doesn't anyone understand that? And whatever, at least I'm over five feet." He snarled, his lips twitching upward in satisfaction when the large vein in her forehead popped up.

"Well at least my hair is natural." She retorted, subconsciously taking a step towards him.

"So is mine squirt!" He practically shouted, matching her step with one of his own.

"You lie as bad as you dye, Carrot." She spat, hands curling into fists at her side.

"My hair is fucking natural for fuck's sake and what the hell are you? A fucking nursery rhyme?" He countered, ignoring his now aching head that seemed to be pounding in tune with the throbbing vein in his temple. With each retort the two drew closer together until their noses were almost touching. They're, at first, small cries turning into shouts.

"You're just jealous!"

"Jealous? Of you? Ha! Not even if my fucking life depended on it!"

"Well if you keep talking like that to me your life is gonna depend on it."

"Is that a threat Midget?"

"Damn right it is Strawberry!"

"Argh! That's enough outta you two! I-!"

"Shut up Renji!" They both cried turning away from each other for a second to glare at the red haired whore. Rukia was just about to turn back to yell something else at the strawberry when a thought crossed her mind. Renji! This was all his fucking fault! He knew she was going to see this guy again, and he didn't fucking warn her! The asshole!

Ichigo looked back at Kuchiki, his handsome features twisted with barely concealed rage; however the look on her face caught him off guard. She still looked freaking pissed as hell, but her anger wasn't directed at him anymore, it was aimed at Renji. _Renji? What the fuck did he do…? Wait…the fucking bitch set us up! This is all his fucking fault!_

"Renji!" The two shouted simultaneously, the said male cringed away from them, their combined anger seeming to create an evil-like aura.

"Why didn't you tell me that the asshole worked here?"

"Why didn't you warn me 'bout the midget?" Rukia spun on Ichigo, her foot subconsciously lashing out and catching his shin in a nice blow.

"Asshole!" She cried as he winced in pain, resisting the urge to grip his now stinging leg. Fucking midget! "I have a fucking name ya know!"

He sneered. "Oh? Midget wasn't it? My bad, Shortie."

Rukia snarled, her hands clenching and then unclenching at her side as she took another step towards him. "You fucking-."

"What the fuck is going on here?" The new voice caught the two off guard and simultaneously they both whirled around, their heads whipping in the direction of the door. There stood a young woman, dressed in an outfit (that if Rukia was to be honest), was far from modest. She was leaning against the doorframe, smoking an extravagant looking pipe and looking rather…bored.

Rukia, intrigued by this newcomer, stared at the young woman with a mixture of curiosity and horror. She didn't know how much of the fight the woman had heard, but she was hoping it wasn't much. Ichigo turned away from her, taking this moment to look around at the room full of people. To say everyone was merely shocked…was an understatement. Mostly everyone, save for the always serious people like Ulquiorra and Harribel, and Stark who was sleeping heavily in the corner of the room, was laughing. Some were laughing so hard tears were appearing at the corners of their eyes. Ichigo's own eyes twitched, they were laughing and having fun at his expense, those bastards. He spotted Rangiku and felt the vein in his head grow in size. The bitch was looking like she just won the fucking Nobel Prize, who seriously looked that ecstatic at five in the fucking morning?

"Great. 'Ey Kukaku." Ichigo looked up, pulled out of his thoughts by Abarai, who was staring at Kukaku in exasperation.

"Don't 'ey Kukaku me, what the hell is going on here? I come up here to take the new chick with me to meet the bosses and walk into the room to find her and Kurosaki practically bitin' each other's heads off. So start explainin' Abarai, I don't got all day."

"Wait. Wait. Hold up." Ichigo interrupted just as Renji opened his mouth. "The new chick? Who is she?" The others turned to Ichigo with equal looks of disbelief on their faces, Rukia glanced up at him, her brows furrowed and her mouth set in a frown.

Kukaku, who was amazingly the only one not surprised, rolled her eyes at the strawberry, God he was such an idiot at five in the morning. Then again, she didn't blame him; Yamamoto's last minute change to Kuchiki's introduction plan (going from before work started to after work) kinda set them all off. She, for one, was tired as fuck. "The chick you're standing next to."

Ichigo looked to his left, and was caught off guard for just a second when he didn't see anyone, before glancing down, his hazel eyes locking onto the violet ones in front of him. He was silent for a second as he continued to stare at her and then something clicked and without warning he doubled over, succumbing to uncontrollable fits of laughter. Rukia's brows rose as the orange haired twat continued to laugh aloud, the outburst had definitely surprised the others in the room, for they were just as quiet as she was.

Kukaku cocked her head to the side, surveying Ichigo with slightly amused eyes, it was rare for him to smile, let alone laugh. "What's so funny Ichigo?"

Ichigo sucked in a breath, trying to regain his composure, but another look at Rukia sent him into a fit again. The young woman glared at him, her eyes glowing with malice. Damn asshole was laughing at her? What was so fucking funny anyway?

"This girl…this girl is the fucking new whore? Ahahahahaha. No fucking way!" He said between gulps of air and at the end succumbed to another fit of laughter. Rukia's eye twitched as he continued to laugh, what was so funny about that? Didn't he see that this whole thing was tearing her apart? How dare he laugh at her when she was being forced to do this, the arrogant little git!

She snarled, grabbing the attention of the others in the room. Dozens of eyes turned to her as she continued to glare at Ichigo. Renji gulped, shrinking away from the young woman to stand beside Rangiku, who was still smiling like an insane person.

"That's the girl?"

"Yeah. That's the girl."

"Hahaha! Yes! Finally some entertainment for the night, oh this is just too fucking good."

Renji grunted, not sure what to say. He turned back to Rukia and shuddered, she really did look like she was going to kill Ichigo, but the damn ass was laughing so hard he didn't even fucking notice. Rukia's hands curled into fists as her teeth ground together, her eyes blazing as she glared at the doubled-over young man. "And how is that funny?"

Ichigo glanced up at her and let out another hearty laugh. After a few seconds he straightened up, the smirk on his face the only evidence of his earlier outbreak. He stared at her with a look that was neither angry nor humorous, just…confident. "How is it not fucking funny? I mean, _you_ as the new _whore_? It's funny just thinking about it. I mean, come on. What could you possibly do? You're like, what…four six…four seven if you're lucky? Don't get me wrong, great height for giving blowjobs, you won't even have to kneel, but sex? Hahahahahaha. Oh, too funny. Now I know this is definitely a joke. Nice job Renji gotta admit I actually fell for it for a moment there. Thanks brat but you're not needed anymore, now run along, its hours past your bedtime." He laughed again, his lack of sleep and the amount of alcohol flowing through his bloodstream making his mind all fuzzy and his thoughts far from rational. The small, still sober part of him knew it wasn't a joke and also knew he was way out of line, but this was what sake did to people, it made them act like complete assholes. Turning away from the others, he slinked back against the wall, adjusting himself so that he'd be comfortable. "Hey, wake me up when the employee gets here."

Rukia stared in shock as Ichigo let his eyes slide close, her mouth hanging open and almost touching the floor. She couldn't believe that he had just insulted her, like that, in front of all those people, and to top it all off, he thought her working there was a joke. What? Just cause she was short didn't mean she couldn't be as good a whore as all the rest of 'em. Her mouth twitched at the corners, a deep growl escaping from her throat as more thoughts crossed her mind. _That arrogant asshole, how dare he insult me like that! The insolent little bastard will pay for what he's done! He will pay…!_

She was so angry she could kill someone, in fact she was warming up to the idea at an almost frightening speed. But no, not yet. She wouldn't kill him yet, she'd have him begging on his knees before she did something like that. Begging on his knees, oh she was going to have so much fun torturing him. So much fun and she knew just what she was going to do about it too. Oh the taste of revenge has never seemed so sweet…

Renji watched in horror as the look on Rukia's face went from that of rage to something more along the lines of sickly sweet with a tint of murder. It would be a miracle if Kurosaki lived through the minute, let alone the day.

"Chair." The words left Rukia's mouth before she could stop them. Any rational thoughts she had were now gone, replaced only with the sole want to exact revenge. She already knew what she was going to do, even though the still sane part of her mind was practically begging her to stop. She knew she was going to regret this later, she could already feel it, but it was like she couldn't stop herself, she had to go through with it. He had to pay for what he'd done, the shame and embarrassment; she'd lay it on him tenfold. Oh how he'll regret ever making fun of _the_ Rukia Kuchiki. "Renji, get me a chair."

"But Rukia-."

"NOW!" She practically screamed, her face contorting in anger before returning to that sickly sweet look again. Renji quickly did what he was told, setting the chair next to her before jumping back a little and returning to his original position. Rukia smiled a smile that sent shivers down everyone's spine, even those of the bouncers. Fuck, what had Ichigo gotten himself into? "Big guy, pick up your friend and sit him down in the seat, will you? Please." She added turning the smile to Chad, her voice as disturbing as her smile. She waited a moment as he debated about what to do, he didn't want to give up Ichigo and he could probably take her but…

"Dude! Just give him to her, like shit!" Ikkaku hissed, widening his eyes for emphasis. That settled it. Chad effortlessly lifted Ichigo, who cried out in response, his eyelids fluttering open in alarm.

"Chad! What are you doing?" The gentle giant didn't say a word as he put him in the chair and moved away, going back to his original position against the wall. Ichigo blinked what the hell had that been about? _Hm. Maybe another joke or something…whatever. Ow, fuck. This chair is hurting my freaking ass. Better get up. _Carefully he started to hoist himself out of the chair, his face twisting a little from the pain, when a hand on his chest forced him to stop. Blinking, he looked down at the hand and then let his eyes wander up the arm and the upper body, until he got to the face. He blinked again, not sure if he was seeing right. "Didn't I tell you to go home?"

Rukia grinned, the smile unnerving Ichigo just a tad. Who the hell smiles like that? Slowly, deliberately, and before he could even register what she was doing, she started to run her hand lightly down his chest, her fingertips gliding over his taunt muscles until they reached the top of his jeans, where her index finger slid inside, pulling slightly on the tight piece of clothing. Ichigo's eyes almost popped out of his head, what the fuck was this chick doing? Rukia's smile only widened at his reaction. This was going to be so much fun. "Let's make a little…friendly wager, shall we…Ichigo?" She asked her voice low and the tone seductive. She didn't wait for an answer, instead deciding to run her finger along the band of his pants, making him shiver just a tad. "You say that I don't have the kind of skills necessary to be a whore, and I'm telling you I do. Now, I know for a fact that I'm right and your…well wrong, so here's what's going to happen. I'm going to perform a couple of…things on you and were going to see how well you can…keep yourself under control. Do you understand?"

Again she didn't wait for an answer, instead slipping another finger into the band of his jeans. "Now here's where the bets come in. I bet I can make you cum in less than twenty minutes. If I succeed, you apologize to me and accept me as your new co-worker. I'm also expecting lunch for the rest of the month. Does that sound alright?"

_NO!_ The sane part of his mind instantly screamed as a small, fluttering panic engulfed him before quickly disappearing. _Don't do it! It's a trap! Don't do it!_ But the shrieks soon stilled to a dull roar, and then to a slight buzzing, and then to nothing at all. Ichigo grunted, fucking shit, the alcohol was affecting his brain more than he had thought. What had he been thinking just then? What was happening? He instantly stilled when another voice entered his mind. A calm, cool, collective voice; daring him to take the bait.** Do it Ichigo. Do it.** Before he could even think about the consequences, he had spoken.

"And if you lose?" Rukia smiled, he was finally taking her seriously…good.

"It's whatever you want. Not like it matters anyway, we both know I'm going to win." That's right, goad him Rukia. Get him to agree to it.

Ichigo sneered, the action making his face twist slightly, the expression almost identical to Rukia's. "You're on."

Rukia smirked as all eyes in the room widened beyond normal capability. The idiot fell for it; oh this was going to be just too good. She licked her lips gleefully at the thought of this handsome yet arrogant bastard succumbing to her touches and embarrassing the hell out of himself in front of all his co-workers. Oh yes, this was going to be great.

Kukaku eyed the scene before her, a large grin stretching the corners of her mouth. _Oh Ichigo, what have you done? You are so in for it now._ Without a second thought she shoved her hand into her pocket and retrieved her cell phone. Flipping it open, she dialed the all too familiar number before placing it to her ear.

"Hey Yoruichi, its Kukaku, I-. Yes I know yer busy…this _is_ important…I wouldn't have called ya if it weren't…well if ya would just let me talk…well that's why I called ya. We got a little held up, listen; you've got to get up here. I'm serious. You are not going to want to miss this Yoruichi, this is a once in a lifetime chance. It's _good_, trust me. No, I swear it isn't something stupid. Just get up here! And bring Urahara and Isshin with ya if ya can, I have a feeling their not going to want to miss this." She clicked the phone shut, shoving it back into her pocket, her smile widening profusely. Oh what a night this was turning out to be…

The others in the room were slowly getting over their initial shock and before the two in the center of the room could even blink; hands were lashing out, palms full of money as they all whispered to each other, making their own individual bets. _Good, I have their attention_. Rukia's smile widened ever-so-slightly. When the rustling stopped she turned back to Ichigo, "Ready?"

Before he could even finish nodding, she stepped forward and straddled his hips, her fingers still running along the front of his pants. Slowly she pulled them out, letting the tips skim lightly down the front of his shirt as she leaned forward, her mouth resting against his neck. Ichigo stiffened; the chick was in dangerous territory. His neck was one of his main weaknesses and if she found that one spot right below his ear, oh he was seriously fucked. He was starting to regret ever making the deal, his teeth raking at his lower lip as Rukia stuck her tongue out, carefully licking a small area of exposed skin. He shuddered, the response making her smile against his skin; slowly she stuck her tongue out again and licked the same spot, before biting down harshly.

Ichigo jumped slightly in his chair, his breaths coming out more ragged as Rukia licked the sore area before taking the skin into her mouth, suckling gently. _Why not mark him while I'm at it? Remind him of the mistake he made, not to mention embarrass him for days after. Oh Rukia, you've outdone yourself this time. _She smirked, as her fingers finally reached the top of his jeans. Her left hand easily slipped up his shirt, her fingers gliding along the defined lines of his hard muscles. She barely heard the door open, and the three collective gasps that seemed to follow, she was too intent on what she was doing to notice. Ichigo was tense underneath her, his hands clutching the bottom of the chair with such force his knuckles were white. His eyes were squeezed shut as she continued to attack his neck with her mouth, the fingers of her left hand sending chills down his spin. Her other hand continued to fiddle with the waistband of his jeans, her fingers pulling teasingly on the fabric.

Without meaning to, he began to respond to her touches, biting down hard on his bottom lip as he tried not to moan. This was so uncool, why did he have to be aroused so easily? In fact, why did he have to be freaking drunk of all things? And why did this girl have to be so freaking…gah. _I'm tired, I'm just tired. Tired and drunk. I'm not thinking rationally. Keep yourself under control Ichigo. The midget can't do a thing to you, don't give in. Just ignore it, yeah, just ignore it. _Just then Rukia bit down and before he could stop himself, he moaned. Fucking shit! _Well there goes that plan…_

She pulled away, smiling down at the now reddening piece of skin on the orange haired bitch's neck, before aiming the grin at him. "Five minutes. Can you hold out for another fifteen?" She chuckled as he glared at her, hatred and self-loathing mixing with each other. He snarled in response and she laughed again. "I think I might…speed this along a bit. Try not to get to excited though; I want you to hold out for as long as you possibly can." She smirked at him, the action intensifying the glare. Pulling her hand out from under his shirt, she positioned her hands at his hips, her fingers slipping back into the waistband of his jeans. Slowly, and without warning, she started to glide them towards the button in the center. Teasingly, she fiddled with it before popping it open, the snap sounding a lot louder than it was.

Ichigo tensed, she was not going to touch him was she? Fucking shit she totally was. _What the fuck have I done? _Rukia smirked slightly as she pushed off him, she knew he wouldn't be suspecting this one move and that thought was already making life look a whole lot better. Once she was off him, he immediately relaxed. Was she done now? Had she embarrassed him enough? He already fucking moaned, what else did she want? He stared at her suspiciously, no, this girl would not let him off the hook that easily and he fucking knew it. She smiled at his suspicious glare, making him fidget in his seat. _Fuck, what's she gonna do?_ Just as he was about go insane from the suspense, Rukia looked him straight in the eye, catching his attention. Slowly she started to move, descending towards his lower half, her violet irises never leaving his.

She was soon on her knees, her hands moving up to pry apart his legs. Ichigo's eyes almost popped out of his head. What was she doing? She was _not_ going to suck him off! Not in front of his co-workers! …Or was she…? Despite the million things wrong with that thought, Ichigo couldn't help but feel a little aroused, his friend hardening just a tad. This was so…not…cool…

Rukia smirked at his reaction; she could see it in the way he stared at her. He thought she was going to suck him off. Yeah. Fucking. Right. Like that would _ever_ happen. Please. She suppressed a chuckle as she paused for a moment, adding to the suspense in the room. No, what she had planned for him was far more…exciting. It was something that he would most definitely respond to, without fail. Locking eyes once again, she gradually started to lean forward, her hands spreading his legs further, until her nose was almost touching the zipper to his pants. Ichigo inhaled sharply, the suspense and anticipation practically killing him. He wished with all of his physical being that she would just hurry this along, but she seemed inclined to make him suffer. Just great…

After another moment of silence passed, she thought it was time to end the poor boy's suffering. Carefully she leaned forward, catching the zipper to his pants in-between her teeth, before looking back up, making sure he was staring directly at her. His eyes locked onto hers, his expression turning from suspicion, to shock, to horror as she started to slowly unzip his pants with only her teeth. Ichigo thought he'd never seen such an arousing sight before in his entire twenty-one years of living. _Oh God. WHAT have I done?_

It was only until after she had finished unzipping his jeans that Rukia heard the exhaling of breaths. _Haha_. Everyone was just as into this as the twat. _Good_. Pulling away from his crotch, she glanced up at him, before placing her hands on his knees and hoisting herself up and into his lap. "I think I'm going to speed this along a bit faster. You have ten more minutes…can you hold out for that long?" She smirked at him, the glare just making it bigger. "Your face is going to get stuck like that if you're not careful you know." He snarled at her, but the snarl soon turned into a cry when, without warning, Rukia stuck her hand in his pants. "You're able to wear boxers with such tight pants on? Impressive." She laughed when he glared back at her. Fucking shit! _This girl…holy fucking…gah! I mean...fuck! I haven't been touched like this in a long time, ngh! I wonder…shit…how much longer…I can…uh…fucking…last…__**dammit**__! _

Ichigo mentally cursed himself. Damn his fucking drunk and tired ass. If only he hadn't fucking agreed to this. Why did he fucking agree to this? Not that it didn't feel good but fucking shit! He did not want this chick touching him, at all. _Oh shit…what the fuck is she doing…no don't do that! No. No. No! _"Fucking shit…" He hissed; the sound coming out more like a moan as she wrapped her fingers around his half-hard length. Rukia smirked for the fiftieth time in ten minutes as she felt him squirm underneath her. She wouldn't admit it, not aloud anyway, but fact was, the guy was a nice size, definitely bigger than what she was expecting, that's for sure.

She felt him twitch in her grasp and her smirk widened. "Wow…already hard are ya?" He glared at her, making the smirk stretch across her face. "Amazing. Even with my fingers wrapped around you, you can still manage to look scary. Let's wipe that frightening look off your face…shall we?" She whispered sweetly to him as she started to pump his hardening member excruciatingly slow. "Five minutes…are you ready?" A small moan answered her and she smiled again, this boy was now wrapped around her little finger and the best part was, they both fucking knew it. She smirked at him as he narrowed his eyes at her, his mouth pulling into a grimace as he tried to contain what little dignity he had left.

How in fucking hell had he ended up here, in this chair, with a girl sitting in his lap and pumping away at his, until now, neglected cock? He groaned; him and his stupid pride, why the fuck did he let her bate him into agreeing? Then again, it wouldn't have mattered if he hadn't agreed; he still would've been made fun of by his fellow workers…but still. That was a lot better than cuming in front of all of them. Fuck. He moaned again as she picked up the pace, his once half-hard member now fully erect. He could already feel the familiar waves of sensation beginning to course through his body. _No. No! I won't give in! Not yet. ..Less than five minutes. I got less than five minutes, I can do this!_

_Three minutes. _Rukia thought as she continued to pump Ichigo's cock with her hand. She had to give the guy credit, he was holding out longer than she had expected, in fact he was doing a lot better than she'd expected. She'd be sure to congratulate him when it was all over. _Two minutes, fuck I can't believe he's got such an iron will. Plan B! _

Not wanting to waste anymore time, Rukia leaned forward and latched her mouth onto Ichigo's throat, her other hand making its way back up his shirt again. He stiffened, and she felt his resolve slip away for just a second, and then it was back, stronger than the last time. _Sorry Strawberry, but I'm the one who's going to be winning this bet…_

Ichigo clung to the seat, his knuckles a deathly white as he squeezed his eyes shut, forcing himself to keep calm. Fucking shit, this bitch didn't look like it, but she fucking knew what she was doing. _Ah shit. _He hissed as he felt his resolve slipping, the shudders becoming increasingly violent and the waves of pleasure seeming to grow larger in strength. _No. No. No! One minute, one minute!_ He could feel it, he was almost there, he was so close to winning, just a few seconds more…

Rukia was barely aware of the others in the room as she continued her ministrations. Her tongue was trailing its way up Ichigo's throat while her hand maintained its rhythmic pumping on his enlarged cock. _Fucking shit, less than thirty seconds and he's barely holding on, what the hell is this man made out of?_ Ichigo grunted, turning away from her as he bit down on his bottom lip. _Twenty…ngh…twenty seconds…uh…_

Quickly, she picked up the pace, her hand pumping with an almost violent force as her teeth scraped against the hard muscle of his neck, her tongue tracing smooth patterns against the milky skin. _Fifteen…_

Ichigo's breath hitched in his throat as Rukia's mouth drew dangerously close to the sensitive spot on his neck. _No! Not yet, just another ten seconds! Come on!_

Rukia felt him tense beneath her as she neared a small spot of skin right underneath his ear. _Yes! If this is what I think it is…it's over…good job though Kurosaki…it's amazing you held out this long._ She thought as her tongue started to trail back up his throat, her mind mentally counting the seconds as they slowly ticked away. _Ten._

Ichigo shuddered as he felt the wet muscle slowly makes it was way back up his neck, his fingers gripping the chair harder as the waves started to intensify. _Nine._

_Eight._ Feeling his resolve beginning to collapse, Rukia picked up the pace, using his shudders as a way to detect where the most sensitivity was located.

_Seven._ Ichigo shivered, trying to ignore the waves of pleasure wracking his body, his pants were already beginning to get sticky, the pre-cum oozing from his tip coating the fabric. _C'mon Ichigo, just seven more seconds…_

Rukia almost giggled in glee, she found it! She found the spot! Now all that was left was finding the right moment to trigger the reaction... _Six._

_Five._ He could feel it, he was losing it. Stars were beginning to pop in and out of his vision, the world becoming fuzzy and bright. No, no. He had to hold on, just a few more seconds…

Rukia beamed as she positioned herself, noting with satisfaction that Ichigo didn't even notice; his attention to focused on her hand to acknowledge much else. _Four._

_Three._ He knew his resolve was collapsing, the pleasure to much for his body to handle. Even if he didn't cum in the next three seconds, he'd still end up releasing anyway.

Slowly, Rukia leaned in, her tongue poking out to touch the exposed skin right underneath the dumbass's ear. She smiled in satisfaction at his reaction, yes; this was definitely the right place. _Two._

_And…I win._ She thought, and without wasting another second, bit down as hard as she could. Ichigo jerked underneath her, moaning loudly as the last wave overcame him, his body wracking from its intensity as he came. Rukia smirked as Ichigo began to shudder violently beneath her, the all too familiar sticky sensation engulfing her hand as he released the contents of all his pent up, sexual frustration. _Man, he hasn't been laid in awhile. There's a fucking shit load in here!_

Ichigo's hold on the chair loosened as he felt the last effects of his orgasm come to an end. He was panting heavily; his eyes shut tight as he tried to slow his still pounding heart, two thoughts crossing his mind as he took a few deep breaths. First, (and it pained him much to admit it), that was one of the best fucking hand jobs he'd ever received. And second, he had never hated anyone as much as he hated that fucking midget right then. Little bitch had made a fool out of him in front of all his co-workers and that was not going to end well, they both knew that much.

"Hey asshole. Snap out of it." Rukia commanded, her voice breaking the silence that had filled the room and snapping Ichigo out of his thoughts. He glared ferociously at her, making the corners of her mouth twitch up. "Holy fuck you're persistent. Stop with the evil glares, really what are you trying to accomplish here?"

"Shut up ya raven haired whore." He snarled, making her smirk in response.

"Good. Looks like you finally understand where I'm coming from. Now come on and apologize, I don't have all fucking day."

"Who said you won?"

Rukia tilted her head to the side, her brows disappearing into her hairline. "Wow, was it that good you lost track of the time? I did win stupid, isn't that right Renji?" She turned to the redhead expectantly, but the shithead just stared at the two of them, his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open. She rolled her eyes; that seemed to be the only thing the dumbo was capable of doing at the moment. Sighing in exasperation she turned, opening her mouth as if to ask somebody else, when a voice stopped her.

"Oh she won Ichigo. Fair and square."

Ichigo jumped in his seat, almost throwing Rukia off his lap as he looked up in alarm, his eyes landing on Yoruichi, who was smiling so widely it looked painful. "Y-Yoruichi? Wah…?"

"Wow. Kuchiki did a good job, you can't even talk!" She laughed aloud, the sound bringing warmth to his cheeks. "I saw the whole thing Ichigo, gotta admit, it was quite a big surprise. I came up here expecting a fight only to find you getting pumped by the new chick, I don't know whether to congratulate you or laugh."

"B-But…how did you get up here?" He stammered, grunting a little when Rukia unexpectedly pulled her hand away, the slick substance of his sperm trickling down her small hand and onto her forearm.

"I walked duh." She laughed again, seeing the exasperated look on his face. "Kukaku called me, said it was urgent, so we came up here as fast as we could."

Ichigo's eyes widened, _don't tell me…_"We…?"

"'Ey Ichigo!" Urahara cried as he popped up next to Yoruichi, a wide grin on his face.

"Urahara?" Ichigo cried before his eyes landed on his father, who was looking ridiculously happy. "Dad? What the hell?" His dad just continued to smile as Urahara reluctantly handed him a big stack of money.

"Wow Ichigo, interesting situation ya got yerself into. Though I had no idea ya could hold out for so long. I have to say, I'm impressed. Congratulations." The blonde haired man smiled before moving a little closer to him, a hand blocking his mouth from the others' view and his eyes trailing on Isshin, who was at the moment counting his money. "Though if you could cum a little earlier next time that'd be great, your dad took all my money."

"There's not gonna be a next time!" The strawberry shouted, causing Rukia to slap him across the face with the hand she used to pleasure him.

"Stop screaming in my ear you idiot!" She shrieked before giggling as she caught sight of what she'd done. The creamy substance of his release that had just been coated to her palm was now streaming down his cheek, the drops landing with an almost silent _plip_ on his clothes.

Ichigo's eye twitched as he felt it drip down his face. That was going to be hell to wash off later. "Get. The. Fuck. Off. Me."

Rukia smiled as she adjusted her position in his lap, her knee rubbing tantalizingly slow over his crotch, making him moan a little in response. "Why…? You don't like it?"

"Ngh. Ah. O-Off."

"Not until you apologize."

"I-." The loud click of a camera stopped him and he looked up in horror to find his dad taking multiple pictures of him and Rukia. "What are you doing?"

"Taking pictures…what does it look like I'm doing?" His father asked, taking the camera away from his face to glance at his son.

"Why are you taking pictures?" He almost screamed, but another resounding slap from Rukia quieted him instantly. The raven-haired young woman was smiling evilly; she was liking the power she had over this man, in a way he was kinda like her bitch. _My bitch…this is great! _

"There examples for your sisters, there gonna have to learn how to perform such things sooner or later. Don't you agree, Kukaku?" Kukaku laughed heartly as a strong blush made its presence known on Ichigo's pale cheeks.

"Dad! There sixteen! What could they possibly-?"

"Exactly. What could they possibly do without examples? They are too young to know what to do themselves, so they must be taught the ways."

Ichigo spluttered as Rangiku succumbed to a fit of giggles. No doubt she was picturing his sister giving her taichou a hand job, his eye twitched; now he had the image stuck in his head, fucking great. "What kind of father are you?"

"A father who is ready to be a grandfather. So hurry it up Ichigo, or I might have to rely on your sisters!" Ichigo's face instantly reddened in embarrassment as the others in the room began to laugh. There chuckles growing louder and louder until it felt like an onslaught.

"Strawberry! Man, ya should've seen the look on yer face! Hahaha!"

"Wow Ichigo, you were moaning so loud I could barely hear myself think."

"You're never going to live this down..."

"Your face! It's all over your face!"

"You've been whipped Strawberry!"

"Whipped and then creamed! Hahahahahaha!"

"That was absolutely deplorable."

"I can't believe you actually whizzed in your pants!"

"Dude! It's leaking onto the chair!"

"Children? Hahahaha Strawberry as a dad? Yeah right!"

"Rukia, that's your name right? You fucking genius, you!"

"And to think I wasn't gonna show up today..."

"These will be great for blackmailing, thanks Isshin."

"No problem! Least I can do Kukaku, by the way, thanks for calling."

"Pay up Tatsuki!"

"Dammit Ichigo! Control yourself next time!"

"Last time I bet my money on you!"

"So are ya gonna apologize or what?"

Ichigo's eye twitched as he listened to the onslaught of comments, his face reddening with each remark. They were all laughing at him, laughing at him because in a moment of weakness, he had lost control of himself and whizzed in his pants. Though he would never show it, he was practically dying of embarrassment. True, Ichigo Kurosaki never really had cared what other people thought of him, but that was different. This was different. Hell this whole night was…different. He sighed inwardly as the comments became cruder and before he knew it; his face was red and his anger, skyward.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" He shouted at the top of his lungs, making everyone instantly fall silent, all equally surprised by his loud outburst. "And will you get OFF me already."

"I already told you, I'll get off after you apologize. Understand?" Rukia yawned tiredly and Ichigo's eye almost twitched again. What was up with this girl? Wasn't she afraid of him at all?

"I'm not apologizing to you." He snarled; putting every bit of malice he could muster into that sentence. However, the effect wasn't the one he was hoping for.

Rukia smiled at him, the grin unnerving him greatly. Before he could even say anything, her hand was back in his pants and her fingers wound around his cock. "I thought you would say that." She admitted as she trailed her index finger down his length, a small groan leaving his lips in response. "Apologize and I'll stop."

He shook his head even as she reached the tip and began to slowly massage, his member growing harder and harder with each stroke. She rolled her eyes as she pulled her hand away, the act earning her a low and disappointed moan. He glanced up, unsure of why she had pulled her hand away until he caught sight of her expression. Grinning, she lifted her index finger, which held a generous amount of his essence, and almost laughed at his expression. He stared at her in horror as she brought the finger closer and closer to his face, a wicked grin stretching her lips.

"If you don't apologize right now, I'm going to stick this finger in your mouth. Now I don't have all day so hurry up, unless you're eager to taste yourself." He shuddered as her smile widened, his eyes going from her face to her finger and then back to her face. Without even having to ask he knew she was serious, one wrong move and he was going to be tasting himself, and to say the least…that wasn't something he was really…into, but at the same time…

After a couple minutes of waiting patiently, Rukia decided it was time to force the apology out of him. Ichigo watched in horror as the finger came closer and closer to his face until finally it touched him, the tip resting threateningly on his cheek bone.

"You have five seconds." She whispered as her finger started the slow descent down the length of his face. "Five…four…three…two…" The finger was at the corner of his mouth now, poking lightly as if to ready itself for the easy slip into his slightly parted lips. Rukia grinned as she ran the finger along his bottom lip. "On-."

"Alright! Alright!" He cried, swatting her hand away as he leaned heavily on the chair, causing it to tip over. The two landed on the ground, sprawled out in equally awkward positions. Ichigo practically threw Rukia off him as he backed away, his hand coming up to wipe his mouth of the disgusting white stuff. "I'm sorry. Shit!"

Rukia smiled widely at him as she picked herself up off the floor, dusting off her clothes with her unsoiled hand. "See? Now that wasn't so hard, was it?" She laughed at his expression before casting another unsettling smile at him. "Don't forget, I'm expecting lunch for the rest of the month, got it Strawberry?"

"If you think I'm buying you lunch Midget then your-." Her finger in his mouth stopped him and he almost choked when he tasted something foreign. Holy mother fucking shit!

She chuckled at his mortified expression as she began to use his tongue to clean her finger, the wet muscle unconsciously licking up the juices. "At this point Strawberry, you don't have a choice. Lunch, I'm expecting it and if you don't deliver, well…I'll let your imagination run wild with that idea, but you get the point…don't you?"

Without waiting for a response she removed her finger from his mouth, the resounding _pop_ easily lightening her mood. Straightening herself up again, she regarded Renji, who was still staring at them with his mouth hanging open. "What are you just standing there for? Are you going to introduce me to the rest of them or what? I still need to meet them right? And can you hurry please? My fingers are starting to stick together."

Renji closed his mouth then opened it and then closed it again, his eyes wide as he continued to stare. Rukia glanced up at the ceiling before letting her violet orbs land on him again, but just as she was about to smack him to snap him out of it, a voice broke the silence.

"Actually it's time for you to meet the owner and the bosses." Yoruichi smiled as the new employee turned and regarded her thoughtfully. "I'm Yoruichi Shihoin. Sorry, I would have shown you around earlier, but I had a pile of paperwork on my desk that had demanded my immediate attention."

"Rukia Kuchiki. Nice to meet you and it's quite alright. Renji was a big help." Rukia beamed and Ichigo almost puked. Now she was all sweet and innocent? What the hell? Fucking little two-faced midget! I should-!

"Got something to say Ichigo?" Yoruichi raised her right brow at him in question. The young man's head jolted up and he stared at her in confusion before he realized he had been talking aloud again. He looked away as a blush started to make its way up his neck and to his cheeks. "I take that as a no. Anyway, speaking of Ichigo, I gotta thank you; boy has been needing something like that for a long time."

"Yoruichi!"

"Don't deny it Ichigo! It's been a long time and you know it! Just look at your pants!" He glanced down and instantly regretted it. Seeping out of the opening between the teeth of his zipper was a generous amount of himself, the substance dripping and staining his black skinny jeans. The evidence was enough, even he couldn't disagree. It had, after all, been a long time since he'd…done anything. "Anyway, thanks for doing that, maybe now he won't be so uptight all the time."

"Oh it was my pleasure. He held out a lot longer than I thought possible anyway."

Yoruichi laughed as Ichigo narrowed his eyes at them, his mouth set in a thin line. "That's Ichigo for you; the boy's been stubborn since day one. Isn't that right Isshin?"

"Yes it is. Oi Ichigo!" He cried, giving his son a fair second warning before turning to pounce on him.

"Dad? What the hell!" He shouted; his foot flying upwards to block his dad's punch.

"Great block! But I've got you-." He was cut off when Ichigo's fist connected with his face.

"F-Fucking shit! For once in your life DON'T attack me at FIVE in the FUCKING morning!" He panted as he leaned over, his hands resting on his knees in an attempt to steady himself.

"Really Ichigo, ya should be used to yer father's daily antics by now." Urahara called, chuckling behind his fan when Ichigo looked up to glare at him. "Rukia's right, yer face is gonna get stuck like that one day. Reminds me, I'm Kisuke Urahara, manager of the strip club, and that man lying on his ass over there is Isshin Kurosaki, Strawberry's dearest daddy. It's a pleasure to meet ya, Rukia-chan."

"Thank you Urahara-san. It's nice to meet you too." Rukia smiled as she bowed her head before turning to the woman with the pipe.

"Oh, the name's Kukaku Shiba, nice ta meet ya."

"Likewise."

"Anyway, we've already wasted enough time. We got to get you to Yamamoto before he sets Sasakibe on us, that man's worse than a pack of fucking wolves, I tell ya. Don't worry though, you'll have enough time to meet the others later, as for now, we've got to get going." Yoruichi stated, her hand latching onto Rukia's arm as she began to half pull/half drag her to the door. "Are ya ready Isshin? I'm sure Yamamoto is gonna wanna hear all about this!"

"What?" Ichigo yelled as he dodged another punch, courtesy of his deranged father. "Your gonna tell Yamamoto?"

"Well…yeah. Ya seriously didn't think we'd keep this incident quiet did ya?" Urahara cocked his head to the side as he eyed Ichigo thoughtfully. The young man spluttered.

"Of course I did!"

"Well, sucks for you Ichigo, cause I'm gonna release, I mean tell, them everything." Kukaku winked as Yoruichi turned away, trying to hide the smile spreading like rapid fire across her face. Ichigo glared at the two as he gave his father a good kick to the head that sent him flying across the room.

"Excellent! Your combat skills have not staled like I previously thought, in fact they-."

"SHUDDAP DAD!" His dad instantly fell silent as he looked expectantly at his son who was rubbing his temple. "I have a hangover, I'm starving, I'm tired, and I need a shower like nobody's business. If were done here, I'm going home. And don't, for the life of me, DON'T tell Yamamoto what happened."

"Oh were done here and no matter what were telling Yamamoto what happened. Kiss yer carefully built bad-ass reputation good bye Ichi, cause it is now officially gone. Now let's get outta here, I'm tired and the sooner I get home the better. C'mon Isshin." Kukaku turned away from the wide-eyed Ichigo, her gaze resting on the crumpled figure of his dad. Grabbing him by his collar she began to drag him towards the door. "We'll meet ya there Yoruichi." And with that the two disappeared behind the door.

Urahara chuckled as he cast a side-glance at Ichigo, who was still wide-eyed. "Well then, we might as well get going, don't want to keep the grumpy lady waiting. Are you two ready?"

Yoruichi nodded before turning around to address the others in the room. "Alright guys, you're free to go home. I'm expecting all of you back here at your respective times; things will be a little different tomorrow so make sure you get enough sleep, if I hear any of you complaining I might just kill ya." She smirked before adding a slightly belated, 'just kidding.' "Anyway, nice work today and I'll see ya in the evening, g'nite!"

"Night everyone!" Urahara bowed his head before turning away to offer his arm to Rukia, who took it with a little uncertainty. Ichigo was staring at the three in shock, he hadn't even heard what Yoruichi had said, his mind still on Kukaku's last words. 'Your carefully built bad-ass reputation is now gone.' He groaned inwardly as slowly, everything over the last thirty minutes hit him. Fucking shit Kukaku was right! The reputation that he so carefully built for himself over all these years, the reputation that he had slaved at constantly, the reputation that said he could take anything and give it back ten-fold, had crumbled around him. All because of that little fucking midget! Ichigo almost growled; he was now officially the laughing stock of the whole house! He was never going to live this down, never! He could feel it in the way the others were looking at him, in the way they tried to hide their smiles, and for once in his life he felt a strong urge to run. But he wouldn't, he couldn't. He knew himself and his abilities better than anyone. He would move on from this, he would rebuild his rep again, it wouldn't take that long anyway and he knew it. It was just the next couple of days that bugged him…the next couple of days would be a living nightmare and…

"Ichigo." Ichigo's head snapped up as he was brought out of his thoughts, his eyes settling on Yoruichi. "Man, you're tired, go home, take a shower, eat and then sleep. I need you bright-eyed and bushy-tailed later, that way I can make fun of you without feeling too guilty."

"Yeah, whatever." He replied, his cool attitude taking over once more. Like he would ever give that room of assholes the satisfaction of watching him break. Like he'd ever break! Not to mention, if he just ignored everything and everyone, it would drive the midget nuts, and he knew it. She wanted to watch him squirm, and that was just something he would never allow her to experience. Yes, the best thing he could do was be calm, act calm and stay calm. That would surely drive her nuts, and that was just what he wanted to do, drive her nuts.

Yoruichi rolled her eyes before turning away and opening the door. "Sheesh, your such an ass sometimes ya know? Anyway I'll see you later. Bye Ichi."

He grunted in response, his attention still on his previous thoughts as he turned away to grab his bag of crap in the corner. Just as he was about to stoop over to pick it up, a small voice wafted through the room and entered his ear.

"It was nice meeting you Ichigo Kurosaki. I hope to see more of you in the…near future."

The door then clicked shut and the room was silent once again. Ichigo felt the unmistakable snapping of his resolve.

"Fucking…shit."

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**A/N: And chapter four is done! Hope you all liked it! And don't forget to review if you have the time sil vous plait! (I think I spelled that right). Anyway, see you next week! 3 you all! =^_^=**


	5. Whipped

**Hey guys! Yeah I know, I'm alive. Go figure. Haha. Anyway, I wanted to apologize. I feel so bad that I haven't updated this thing in like months. I'm not trying to make any excuses but I've been really sick (gotten Shingles, intestinal problem, the whole 9 yards) and I'm a senior in high school and if any of you have gone through that you know how difficult it all is with the college applications and all that other lovely stuff. Anyway, so I wanted to apologize. I'M SO SORRY! I can't promise much for the next chapters, but I will for update once every 2 weeks if not one every week. It depends on what's going on, I've got a bunch of auditions and stuffs so I've been and am going to be very busy. I can promise you that I will do my best and I thank you so so so so so so so x infinity much for the support. Some of you PMed me asking if everything was alright, I haven't gotten to answer all of them, but I will for sure tomorrow. So thank you so much for that. 3 I really, really appreciate it. Now, I don't want to keep you waiting any longer; onto chapter five...**

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Chapter Five: Whipped

"Ishida, could you make it shorter on this side please?" Rangiku asked sweetly, holding up the right side of the skirt Rukia was wearing.

"What? Sh-Shorter? But Matsumoto, are you sure that's necessary?" The raven-haired young woman gawked, not sure if she had heard the orange-head right. It was now Saturday, three days after her orientation and the little incident with the stupid strawberry. She had come to work early at the request of Rangiku, who had told her it was a matter of utmost importance. At first she thought she was going to have to clean or fill out more paperwork or something along those lines, but never in her wildest dreams did she think it was because she had to pick out her signature whore outfit.

'_Signature whore outfit?_' She had asked Rangiku, her eyes almost popping out of their sockets. The older woman just grinned as she pushed her towards the back room, all the while explaining why they needed one. It was Yamamoto's idea, big surprise there, only that old pervert would think up something so…strange. Well at least Rukia thought it was strange; then again, she found most things concerning her new job…strange. Anyway, upon entering the back room, the petite young woman found Nel and Orihime waiting for them and before she could even utter a hello, she had been thrown into a large walk-in closet off to the right.

The room was huge, heck it was the biggest closet she'd ever been in, and it was filled to the brink with clothes. Various outfits and garments hung from hangers on metal racks surrounding the large room, a wooden table sat at the back, various sewing instruments, threads and extra pieces of cloth littered its surface. A large, triple full-body mirror (one you might find if shopping for a wedding dress) stood to the left of it, complete with a stepping stool that seemed to be worn from extensive use. It was upon that stool that she was now standing, her eyes scrutinizing her reflection in the large mirror.

The outfit she had picked was one of the more…humble ones in the collection. If you could call it humble, seeing as it was still too short, too revealing, and too slutty for her taste. Then again, her job didn't really revolve around her tastes, more like her customers' and if this was what her customers' liked, well then this was what she had to wear. That's what she had learned anyway, in her last couple of days there, the life of a whore meant sacrifices, and most of those sacrifices gave rather brutal after effects. Not that'd she'd been on the job long enough to know all of those, but at this rate, it wouldn't be long until she did…

"Too short? Are you kidding me?" Rukia's head snapped up, her attention reverting back to the task at hand. Rangiku was surveying her like a tiger might survey its prey, and if it wasn't for the raised eyebrows, she might've found that look to be rather unnerving. "At this rate it won't even meet the requirements."

Her eyes widened as she stared at the orange-head, who in turn just kept barking orders at Ishida—who, being the only one good with sewing, had joined them in the large closet—her gaze never wavering as she continued to mentally measure. "R-Requirements? You guys have requirements?" The question left her mouth before she could stop it, her eyes widening in horror. If the outfit didn't meet the requirements now…what the hell was it going to look like when it did?

"Yes. Yamamoto-sama is very specific when it comes to our outfits. It can only be so long and can only cover so much." Nel spoke softly, so softly that Rukia wasn't sure if she had spoken at all. Rangiku tore her gaze away from the petite woman for the first time in twenty minutes, her eyes resting on Nel almost disapprovingly.

"Yamamoto-_sama_? You're kidding right?" When no answer came Rangiku just sighed. "Nel you are way too respectful of that old pervert, it's his fault that you even have this disgusting job."

"It's not that bad." Rangiku snorted, the noise making the corners of Neliel's mouth twitch upwards.

"Not that bad? It's hell. I'll tell ya, if the love of my life didn't work here, I'd be gone before ya knew it."

"You would not." Orihime teased, giggling when Rangiku just raised an eyebrow at her.

"Oh really? And why wouldn't I?"

"Because you love us too much." Nel smiled as Orihime laughed at Rangiku's expression, which was a cross between a grimace and a smile, giving the older woman an odd looking appearance.

"You're right." She admitted, the grimace turning into a smile. "I do love you guys too much. Who knows what kinda trouble you guys would get into if I wasn't here."

Orihime blinked, her face twisting in mild confusion. "What are you talking about Rangiku? We _do _get into trouble because you _are _here."

"Exactly. Sometimes I wonder what you guys would do without little old me."

"How about: live life to the fullest." Uryu suggested as he tugged on the needle and thread with his teeth, effectively tightening the area and making Rukia squirm.

"Ah! Nobody asked you Ishida!" Rangiku snapped, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly as she turned her nose to the ceiling.

Rukia laughed along with the others, a real genuine laugh that she had not thought herself capable of until now. After the laughter had calmed to a dull roar and then ultimately stopped, with just a couple of snickers left, Rangiku spoke again, her voice soft and sure.

"But really, if it wasn't for some of the people here and Gin, I would have left already. I may look like I enjoy it, but I hate this job." For a moment, Rangiku looked truly sad; the dark circles under her eyes making her look much older than she was, but before any of them could say a word, she was smiling again. "Ah well. At least I get laid, right?"

"I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like a plus to me."

"Oh! Whatever, Ishida. Just cause Orihime hasn't fucked you yet."

"Matsumoto!" Uryu cried just as Orihime gasped 'Rangiku,' their faces turning equal shades of crimson.

"What? You both know it's true! Don't even try to deny it! It's so obvious it hurts." She insisted, her bottom lip jutting out in a mock pout. To her satisfaction, the vein in Ishida's forehead burst forth, throbbing violently as he glared at her.

"Matsumoto!" He snarled, knuckles a deathly white as he forced himself to stay calm. "That's none of your business!"

Rangiku looked positively insulted. "What are you talking about? All business is my business!"

"What takes place in my private life is none of your-."

"Nothing takes place in your private life!"

"Matsumoto!"

"Want some of this Ishida?" She laughed, sticking her tongue out at him as he swiped at her with the needle in his hand. "You missed!"

"Uryu!"

"Wait Orihime, I know I can swipe her if-."

"If what? You can't get me and you know it!"

"Guys! We only have an hour till works starts; we need to finish with Rukia's outfit! Guys!" Orihime cried, but the two ignored her, going about their previous activities of attempted swiping and expert dodging. Rukia watched this whole exchange with raised eyebrows, who knew the people at this place would be so…energetic, not to mention insane. She heard a small chuckle off to her right and turned, eyes landing on Nel, who was smiling at the three still running around the room.

"It's strange but they're always like that…I guess it's to help them forget their pain." She smiled ruefully as she said it, her face taking on a look that could only be described as contented sadness. Rukia's brows furrowed as she looked at the young woman questioningly, her smile widening ever-so-slightly. "You were forced to become a prostitute by Yamamoto-sama, who had seen you at the mall, shopping with your friends. The rest of us have similar stories. Everyone you have already met or will meet was forced into this corrupted business, either because of family, or a direct order from Yamamoto-sama, himself. And as a result, we all can't help but hate it. Many of us were threatened, and blackmailed until we gave in and took the job. For some of us, even leaving is out of the question. Working here until the day we die is a constant fear. However, if it weren't for our equal views of hatred concerning this place, we would not all be as close as we are now. We are like a family; eating together, playing together, and some of us even sleep together." Her smile widened at the last part as the other's yells died down a bit. "We fight, we yell, we scream, kick, bite, laugh, tease, taunt, smile, we do everything together cause this family is all we have. Maybe it's because we are the only ones who can understand each other's pain, but whatever the reason is, this hatred we feel has brought so many of us together. For that, I am truly grateful." She laughed, her eyes sparkling as a hand came up to cover her mouth. "Listen to me, rambling on like this, anyway what I'm trying to say is: welcome to the family Rukia."

"Thank you, Nel." Rukia bowed, a small smile appearing on her face as she stared at the other woman, whose smile had widened as well.

"Did we miss something?" A perplexed Rangiku asked as the three approached, the older woman practically hiding behind Orihime in an attempt to keep Uryu from stabbing her. It was working, for the time being anyway.

"Nope. I was just telling Rukia about some of the people who worked here. Isn't that right Rukia?" Nel winked at the petite woman, who nodded, a small smile on her face.

"Right."

"You didn't tell her anything bad 'bout me did you?" Rangiku demanded, turning her accusing glare on Nel, who just returned it with another smile.

"Of course not Rangiku. I was just telling her that you snore in your sleep."

Rangiku spluttered, cheeks turning red as the others laughed behind their hands. "I do not snore!"

"Liar!" Nel exclaimed, pointing an accusing finger at Rangiku, who looked absolutely taken aback. The older woman spluttered once again before raising her arms, her hands forming the classic 'choke you' pose.

"Why you little-!" She started, advancing on a giggling Neliel, but before she could get within a foot of her, a voice interrupted.

"Hey! What are you guys doing here so early?" They all turned to see Yoruichi standing in the doorway, arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

"Hey Yoruichi!" Orihime called happily as she turned away from Uryu, who was still attempting to swipe Rangiku with his sewing needle.

"Hey Orihime." Yoruichi smiled, nodding at the younger woman. She turned to the others, a questioning look on her face. "Now, as much as I'm happy to see you guys, why are you here?"

"We came early to help Rukia pick out her outfit." Rangiku gestured to the young woman on the foot-stool, before jumping hastily out of the way when Ishida's needle-occupied hand appeared. "Will ya stop doin' that? Ya turd!"

"No! Not until I get you!" Uryu declared as he attempted to, yet again, stab Matsumoto.

"Are you two going at it again? Geeze." The cat-like woman sighed as she approached them, a hand coming up to rub her sore temple. "Outfit picking huh? Oh yeah, that's true, you weren't able to do that the other day. Mmm, that thing with Ichigo took up to much time." She mused quietly, the corners of her mouth twitching up.

"Man. That was hilarious. What I wouldn't do to see that again." Rangiku smirked, turning back to scrutinize Rukia's outfit once again. The younger woman sighed; she was tired of playing dress-up, and the _last_ thing she wanted to hear about was Ichigo. The whole thing was already embarrassing enough without having people constantly talking about it, let alone the compliments. Rukia sighed inwardly; again…_what the hell was wrong with these people?_ Not to mention the whole thing with Byakuya just made everything worse, how was she supposed to know he couldn't stand the orange haired twat? And on top of that, the whole episode had encouraged Yamamoto to write her up a contract. Five years. Five _freaking_ years of this hell hole! And that was just the beginning, just the beginning! She was going to die here. Die a whore. Oh the sadness. The depression. The injustice. The-.

"But you can!" Yoruichi replied with a smile. "Didn't I tell ya? I've got the whole thing on DVD!" The misery. Oh the-. Dammit! She was doing it again! Rukia's eye involuntarily twitched, her mouth pulling into a grimace. _Why me?_

"What? Yoruichi don't joke like that!" Rangiku scolded, shooting the shorter woman a disbelieving glare.

"I'm not joking. I swear. Isshin taped the whole thing! He's selling copies, hurry up and buy one cause their going fast!" Rukia barely suppressed the undeniably strong urge to grab the needle out of Uryu's hand and stab herself with it. The old goat taped it. He _taped_ it? That's it. Her life was officially over. Byakuya was going to roast her alive. Roast. Her. _Alive_!

In the reflection of the mirror, Rangiku looked ridiculously ecstatic. "Huh? No way! How much?"

"Not too much. Your tips should be enough to cover it. But man, even some of the captains are buying it! I swear; I've never seen Isshin with so much money!" Oh yeah. Officially over.

"What? Who's bought it?"

"Well Hisagi got one, Kyoraku, Ukitake, Carias, even Zaraki and Kurotsuchi bought a copy, don't ask me why but they did. Though Zaraki's probably thinking of blackmail, something along the lines of: 'if you don't fight me, I'm gonna show this to someone-or-other' cause he's a sick bastard like that. Hmm, who else…ya know Gin might've already gotten one, you should ask him." That needle was looking more enticing by the second.

Rangiku laughed, oblivious to Rukia's internal struggle. "Knowing him, he probably did. In fact, I bet you he's up in his office watching it right now."

It was Yoruichi's turn to laugh. "Ha! You're probably right, which is why I'm not going to take you up on that offer. You have a…disturbing gift when it comes to gambling." She chuckled as she exited the room for a second; the others could hear her shuffling around.

"Disturbing? How rude Yoruichi." Rangiku called back, an indignant look on her face. "Just cause you can't gamble even if your life depended on it-."

"Hey!" Yoruichi warned as she walked back into the room, a container full of sushi in her left hand and chopsticks in her right. "Watch yourself. Don't forget I'm the one that handles your pay!"

"That reminds me. I want a raise Yoruichi! Ya can't seriously expect me to continually fuck that practically _ancient_ military general do ya? It's disgusting! I swear his dick is gonna shrivel up and die any day now and I-!"

"Matsumoto!" Ishida cried, his cheeks flaring a dark red as he glared at Rangiku. "Will you be quiet for once in your life? I don't know about the others but I, for one, do _not_ want to hear about your sorry fuck stories!"

"At least I have fuck stories to tell Ishida!" Rangiku shot back as she crossed her arms over her chest in defiance, her small tongue poking out between her lips in a silent raspberry. The others in the room grew silent, except for Yoruichi, who was currently choking on a piece of sushi, she was laughing so hard. Nel immediately jumped up to assist the slowly dying woman while the others just stood rooted to the spot. Orihime was blushing a deep red, almost a maroon, and Rukia was slowly edging away from Uryu, not wanting to be too close to the angry looking man and the needle in his hand.

"Why you little-!" He just about shrieked as he scrambled into a standing position, but not before bumping into Rukia, who lost her balance and fell on Orihime, the raven-haired woman cursing all the while.

"What? Ishida! You haven't fucked Orihime yet?" Yoruichi interrupted just as she swallowed the vile piece of sushi. Nel ran out of the room to fetch a glass of water, but not before helping the other two women off the floor. Rukia stepped gingerly back onto the stool, Orihime holding out her arms to balance her. _Bless her soul._

Uryu produced a low, growling noise as his eye twitched for the umpteenth time that night. The large vein in his forehead was threatening to pop as he regarded the two women who just grinned at him innocently, as if they were asking him what day of the week it was. "No I have not and do not intend to until the night of the wedding and if _one more person_ says _one_ _more word_ about it, I am going to post, all over Facebook, what _exactly _happened at last year's Christmas party! In _FULL_ detail!"

Yoruichi and Rangiku visibly blanched; their mouths clamping shut in such a way, Rukia couldn't help but wonder what, as Uryu put it, _exactly_ had happened at last year's Christmas party. In the mirror, Ishida smirked triumphantly, his attention reverting back to Rukia's outfit and the needle in his hand. The silence was short-lived, however, when Rangiku opened her mouth again less than a minute later.

"Ishida! You wouldn't!" She spat, pointing an accusing finger at him that only succeeded in making his right brow rise. "I already told you! I was completely smashed! How was I supposed to notice the difference? They both have white hair!"

"That may be but they're far from the same height and you know it! Ichimaru is well over six feet, but Hitsugaya is only 5'8". How you got that wrong, I have no idea!" He replied in a huff, just as Neliel appeared in the doorway, a glass of water in hand. Yoruichi took it gratefully, chugging the contents down her sore, raw throat.

"I told you I was drunk!" Rangiku replied indignantly, her nostrils flaring in such a way, Rukia thought she saw smoke pouring out.

"That doesn't mean anything! I drank too! You didn't see me humping you cause I thought you were Orihime!"

"Ha! So you've humped!" Yoruichi yelled triumphantly before popping another piece of sushi into her mouth, the choking incident forgotten. "Jeez Ishida. Ya like to get down and dirty don't ya?"

"Oh my-! I already told you two! Do you not listen?"

"Well it's not one of my strong suits I'll tell you that much." The dark-skinned woman grinned maniacally, winking at the others. "Anyway, ya better hurry it up with the alterations, we don't have much time left and Rukia's already got a full schedule."

Rukia blinked, her eyebrows disappearing into her hairline as she regarded the older woman in the mirror. "What?"

Yoruichi grinned widely in response. "Ya got a full schedule. Caught the rest of us by surprise it sure did, but you should be fine. I mean, you were able to even make Ichigo moan, let only cum, and that's no easy feat at all. Kid's as hard as a fucking rock. Normally anyway, but I guess the alcohol and lack of sleep finally got to his brain er something. The idiot is pretty stupid when he's tired, but then again, so is everyone else in this damn joint. That reminds me, no more drinkin' on the job Rangiku! If your gonna drink yourself senseless then you should be able to fuck that so called ancient military general senseless, ya hear?"

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever Yoruichi." Rangiku answered as she rolled her eyes, a small smile playing at the corner's of her lips.

"Tch. Ya say that now, but I betcha fifty bucks that in about an hour or so I'm gonna find some sake hidden underneath all those ridiculous things you call pillows. And I swear if Stark ends up smashing another one cause he fell asleep on top of it, I will not be a happy camper. Hey! Ya better be listenin' to me Matsumoto!" Yoruichi yelled, yet there was still a hint of humor in her voice, indicating that she was, in fact, not as angry as she portrayed.

"Hmm? Me? Oh yeah, sure. I'm listening."

"Hmph. Sure ya are. Whatever, s'not like you ever listen to me anyway. No one ever listens to poor, little ole me." She sniffed dramatically; her arms folding across her chest as she stared at the ceiling. Ishida scoffed in response, his right hand practically flying and before Rukia could even blink; her skirt was about four inches shorter.

"Oh now that looks a lot better!" Rangiku grinned widely as Rukia tugged feebly on the skirt, intent on making the material at least a little bit longer. _Any shorter and __**everything**__ will be showing! _She thought, her right knee subconsciously bending towards her left leg in an attempt to keep that part of herself hidden from at least Ishida's eyes. Not that he was looking her way, but still.

"This short? A-Are you sure?" She asked; her voice sounding strangled from disuse. Clearing her throat she glanced at the mirror and the reflections of the people behind her.

Yoruichi nodded as Nel produced a ruler and placed it against Rukia's thigh. "Yup, that looks about right. What's the length Nel?"

"Five in a half inches."

"Sounds right. Rukia, how tall are you?"

"Uh. Um, four-eight in a half."

"Yup. That'll work. It meets the requirements anyway. What do you think Rangiku?"

"Well it could always be shorter." Rukia's face twisted, her eyes widening in horror as she glanced at the two more sensible young women for help.

Orihime, catching the look, spoke up. "I think its fine the way it is."

"Me too." Nel added; offering Rukia a small, encouraging smile.

"Alright fine." Yoruichi shrugged, popping the last piece of sushi into her mouth. "We'll leave it as is. Are there any other alterations?"

Ishida shook his head. "Nope. The top looks like a snug fit, same thing with the gloves and the boots. Though I can't help but think this ensemble is…missing something…"

"Missing something? Like what?" Rangiku was still fiddling with the bottom of Rukia's skirt, using the ruler to check for any discrepancies.

"An accessory." Uryu replied, swatting the ruler away, how dare she touch his beautiful work. It was perfect! "It needs an accessory, and I'm thinking of an item along the lines of…a collar or choker, kind of like Hisagi's…what do you think Yoruichi?"

"Wouldn't hurt to try. Would you mind Nel?" The green haired woman shook her head before disappearing behind a half-hidden door on the left. Rukia's eyes widened yet again, there was a closet to a closet? What the hell kind of place was this? Yoruichi's voice broke her out of her thoughts, her eyes flying up to lock with the older woman's. "Don't be so nervous Rukia, it'll be fine. Ya look good so don't fret. Just remember your only giving what the first two packages offer, so if they ask for something else you tell them no. They gotta pay to receive. Don't forget that."

"Ah she won't. Don't worry Yoruichi, she'll be fine. She's got us, remember?" Rangiku winked just as Uryu whispered: "Were doomed." _Bam!_ Rukia's eyes widened in bewilderment as she turned on her stool to look behind her; Ishida was sprawled up against the wall opposite them, his legs over his head and his face in his crotch. "SHUT UP ISHIDA!"

"You whore!" He spat as he stood up slowly, wiping his mouth on his sleeve.

"Asshole!" Rangiku shot back, her eyes gleaming with unspeakable excitement.

"Slut!"

"Pussy!"

"Skank!"

"Dick sucker!"

"Cum swallower!"

"Scrotum diddler!"

"Va-. WHAT?" Uryu seethed as he stared angrily at a triumphant Rangiku.

"You heard me Ishida. You are a scrotum…diddler!" She screeched; pausing a moment to point her index finger at the young informant accusingly. "Scrotum diddler!"

"Scro-. What? That's not even a word!" He shouted, his hands curling into fists at his sides.

"It is now!" Rangiku replied, making a face.

Uryu bit his lip, trying to bite back the harsh remark that threatened to spill from his mouth. "You…! Argh! You foul woman! If it wasn't for your large bosom, you'd be out of a job, and out of my hair!"

"Hmph! You're just jealous 'cause my breasts are bigger than Orihime's."

"They are not!"

"Aha! So you've seen them!

"What? I-! Ar-! GAH! You are so _lucky_ that maiming and killing co-workers is considered illegal; for if it weren't, I would MURDER you where you STAND!"

"I'm tellin' ya hun!" Rangiku exclaimed, turning away from the fuming Uryu to face Orihime. "You're gonna be disappointed. There is no way his dick is bigger than two inches! Don't fret though, ya still got time. I'll even help you out myself. We'll go find you a real man, whatd'ya say? Hmm?"

"Uh…Rangiku…it's really nice of you to offer but I-."

"IT IS LARGER THAN TWO INCHES!"

"BULL SHIT!"

"Both of you; SHUT UP!" Yoruichi shrieked, rubbing her temples in mild irritation. "All you two ever do is argue! Look! YOU'RE TURNING MY HAIR WHITE! WHITE I SAY!"

"Uh…Yoruichi-san…that's purple…" Orihime spoke quietly as she pointed her index finger at Yoruichi's head.

"Purple it may be now! But soon it will be lilac and then WHITE! AND I'LL BE DAMNED IF I GET WHITE HAIR BEFORE I TURN FOURTY!" She screamed, her hands pulling furiously at her hair.

"Gin's hair is white." Rangiku pointed out.

"No it is not. It's silver. White and silver are two different colors, which is _also _why I can't _understand_ how you mistook him for Hitsugaya!"

"Like I said, I was drunk! I couldn't tell the difference! And it's not like it was that bad! I mean they're hair is practically the same!"

"Not that bad? You thought your husband was your _BOSS_!"

"Ugh. Whatever. Taicho didn't mind, in fact I'm pretty sure he liked it." She smirked, wiggling her eyebrows seductively. Rukia almost fell off the stool again, she was laughing so hard. Just thinking of the young man being smashed into Rangiku's boobs sent tears down her cheeks. Uryu, on the other hand, looked quite close to puking and Orihime was too busy fluffing Rukia's skirt up to notice anything extraordinary. Or ordinary…in this kind of atmosphere you'd never know.

Yoruichi's eyebrows rose, as she stared at Rangiku dubiously. "Yeah. Okay. Whatever. Anyway, like I was saying, don't forget! And whatever you do, don't acknowledge Chizuru! If you do that girl's gonna jump you like your some kind of sweet treat! She doesn't get many customers so she's horny 24/7; my advice to you is to ignore her. Am I forgetting anything else…? Oh yeah, don't listen to anything this crazy bitch right here says, seeing as half the time she's too drunk to even figure out who her own husband is."

"It wasn't my fault!" Rangiku huffed; the action of crossing her arms over her chest making her humongous breasts look bigger. "They both have white hair dammit!"

"Excuses, excuses." Uryu tsked as he fiddled with the needle and thread in his hand.

"Oh! Go shit in your hand Ishida!"

He stiffened, before turning to her, his expression mildly surprised. "Really Matsumoto? _Shitting? _In my _hand_?That was the best comeback you could come up with?"

Rangiku opened her mouth but before she could utter a sound, Nel appeared in the doorway. She held the object in her hand out as she approached them, Rukia scrutinized the item, it looked like a…leather choker with small studs. Pointed studs. _That, I could work with._ She smiled wickedly, watching silently as Nel passed the choker to Yoruichi, who checked it over. "Nice job Nel. This could work." She smiled at the young woman before dropping the accessory into Rangiku's outstretched hand. "Whatd'ya think Rangiku?"

"It's leather. Matches the outfit well, and it's got that punk rocker chic look to it. I like it." She grinned as Uryu lifted his hand and plucked the item from of her grasp. "Ishida?"

"Not only does it match, but it's in pretty good condition. Amazing considering the way you guys treat your clothes. I'm surprised Sasakibe hasn't chewed you all out yet."

"Oh he has. We just don't care anymore. And let's be serious here Ishida, do ya honestly think that I'm gonna get off my ass to clean this room anytime soon?" Rangiku looked expectantly at Uryu, her lips pursed and eyebrows raised. He rolled his eyes in response before turning away and handing the choker to Orihime, who then placed it around Rukia's neck and clasped it into place. Matsumoto smiled in satisfaction. "What did I tell ya, it looks great."

"Does it?" Rukia spoke softly as she surveyed herself in the large mirror. She had to admit, she liked the choker, not only did it accentuate the paleness of her neck and its length, but it also complimented the outfit as a whole. It looked good, and she liked it. Taking her eyes off the choker, she let her gaze travel lower, over the black, form-fitting, low-cut shirt…bra? What it was she couldn't really tell. But it was short, ending right underneath her small breasts where an elastic band held it in place. The material was snug and it pushed her breasts up and inward, making them look, for lack of a better word, tantalizing. After that was her stomach; flat, pale and smooth, the skin dipping the lower her gaze traveled, allowing her hip bones to prominently stand out for her customers viewing pleasure. The hem of the skirt started at the bottom of her hip, the fabric a midnight black, just like the top. There was nothing really special about it either; it looked like any normal skirt except for the small ruffles that cascaded down it and the fact that it was so short she was sure that half her butt was exposed, if not more. Accompanied with the ensemble was a pair of black, lace gloves that extended to the middle of her upper arm (that matched the lace that embroidered the low-cut area of the top), and a pair of equally black, knee-high boots with heels so high, Rukia couldn't help but feel a little gigantic, even though she was still shorter than all the people in the room. Staring at her reflection, she couldn't help but feel a little, well, pleased. Never, even in her wildest dreams, had she ever envisioned herself wearing something this scandalous, let alone, looking _good _in it. And she looked good, she wasn't afraid to admit that, no not at all. Despite the strange circumstances, she couldn't help but feel a little proud, not to mention, sexy. Her thoughts were confirmed when Yoruichi spoke up, her words enlarging her ego, just a bit.

"Hell yeah. Ya look hot Rukia. Scratch that, ya look damn fine. In fact, I think you'd even turn Ichigo's head in that outfit."

Rukia's expression darkened a little at the comment. Her eye twitching slightly as Yoruichi's smile widened. Yeah right, like she even gave a damn about his tastes, as far as she'd heard, the boy could be straight up gay, seeing as he's ever only had one girlfriend. Whatever, if he liked the view, then he liked the view, but it wasn't like she was going to go around breaking her neck just to please him. Seriously, like she wanted to impress that arrogant piece of garbage anyway, even if he was one of the sexiest things alive. _Woah, Rukia! Strawberry? Sexiest thing alive? No more late-night ice cream splurges. _She thought as she continued to stare at herself in the mirror. Yet, even as she continued to reprimand herself, a small part of her mind couldn't help but smile at the thought of the Strawberry turning his head to look at her and his eyes widening as they raked over her scantily-clad form. She let out a small chuckle; wouldn't that be a sight to see, eh?

"Rukia…?" Snapped out of her thoughts, she turned in the direction of the voice, her eyes landing on Orihime, who was staring worriedly at her. "Are you okay…?"

The dark-haired young woman smiled reassuringly. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking is all." She replied, still grinning as she turned back to her reflection in the mirror. Wouldn't that be a sight to see…?

* * *

"Shut the hell up Jaegerjaquez." Ichigo growled, his face twisting in anger. The blue haired whore just grinned at him, the corners of his mouth stretching into an almost sadistic smile. The orange head rolled his eyes in annoyance, God Grimmjow was such a pain in the fucking ass!

"She fucking kicked yer ass." He taunted; smiling in satisfaction when he noticed the vein in Ichigo's head appear.

"Grimmjow. Shut…the fuck…up."

Ikkaku leaned over as Grimmjow continued to pelt Ichigo with crude insults. "Ya might as well ignore him, he's not gonna stop ya know."

His vein throbbed as he turned away, hoping to ignore the steady comments flowing out of the stupid whore's mouth. "Yeah…I know."

"Though ya gotta admit. She did kick yer ass."

"Shut up Ikkaku!" Ichigo roared; pulling his arm back as if to swing but a heavy hand on his shoulder stopped him. "Chad?"

The giant just shook his head making Ichigo scowl. He knew he shouldn't pick a fight with the others, but man was he itching to punch somebody, anybody. It was Saturday; three days after that little bitch had allegedly 'kicked his ass'. He had gotten into quite a few fights since then and was now on the verge of suspension. Soifon had even threatened him herself, screaming at the top of her lungs:

"NEXT TIME YER ASS FUCKS UP; YOU'RE OUTTA HERE FOR A WEEK, YA GOT IT?"

The threat worked at first, he was able to ignore mostly everyone's crass comments, that is, until he came to Grimmjow, who just had to open his big fucking mouth. Luckily (or unluckily, Ichigo couldn't decide), Chad stopped him before he could implant his fist in the dumb bitch's face, but ever since then the asshole's remarks had only increased in intensity, making it harder for Ichigo to stay calm. Much, much harder.

"So did ya bring her lunch again?" Ichigo glared at them, his mouth set in a thin line that just succeeded in making the two laugh harder, if that was even possible.

"Haha! She's got ya whipped Strawberry!" Grimmjow laughed, his hands clutching his sides as Ikkaku leaned on the wall for support.

"Whipped! Hahaha!" The cue-ball gasped between breaths, his fist repeatedly hitting the hard surface. Ichigo's eye twitched as the others continued to laugh hysterically, his hands curling into fists at his sides as he turned away, intent on ignoring them. Thankfully, the music that was wafting through the club was loud enough to drown them out, albeit giving Ichigo a bad headache in the process. Chad noticed this and silently stuffed his hand into his jean pocket, his fingers curling around the aspirin bottle he kept there in case of emergencies. Not that this was an "emergency" or anything like that but…Ichigo with a headache just didn't mix…at all. Not to mention, the last thing either of them wanted was a repeat of the midget incident. Ichigo was already having problems controlling his anger as it was, they didn't need something else to add to the other's fire, which was pretty much in full bloom still.

Wordlessly, Chad popped the cap off the pill bottle and shook two of the pills out onto his outstretched palm. Nudging Ichigo with his elbow, he held out the pills which the strawberry took gratefully. "Thanks Chad."

"You're welcome." The gentle giant replied so quietly that it took Ichigo a couple of seconds to fully register that he had said anything at all.

"Are…are they still laughing?" He asked, his tone casual but his body language saying something else entirely. Chad looked behind him, yeah the two idiots were definitely still laughing. Except now, instead of leaning on the wall, they were leaning on each other for support. Sado also suspected the two were crying, if the large, fat tears' rolling down their cheeks was any indication.

"Yeah." He answered, tearing his eyes away from the two idiots to look at Ichigo, who was so stiff he could probably be mistaken for a mannequin. The young man spun on his heel—catching Chad by surprise—his hazel eyes, alit with a raging fire, raking the ground around them. "What are you looking for?"

"Ikkaku's bat. I'm gonna split his head open with it." Ichigo replied, his eyes lighting up even more when they landed on the object of his search. "Aha!"

"Ichigo." Sticking out his arm, the large man successfully kept the smaller one at bay, his fingers mere inches from the bat.

"Oh come on Chad, just one hit. One hit! No one will ever know." He tried, straining against the other man, the tips of his fingers brushing the handle.

"Ichigo." The giant started, his tone stern, but before he could continue, a loud howl of laughter erupted from behind them. The two turned to see Ikkaku and Grimmjow, still leaning on each other for support, the former wiping tears from his eyes while the latter smiled wickedly. Ichigo's eye twitched, his hand instinctively reaching for the bat, but Chad stopped him just as his fingers curled around the base. Grimmjow noticed this, making his grin widen considerably.

"Whatcha got there Carrot-top?" He asked, his voice taking on that high-pitched quality one uses when talking to an infant. Ichigo's eye increased its twitching. "Oh my! Is that a bat? Is the wittle strawberry angwy?"

"Why you little-!"

"Now, now Grimmjow. Best not to get him too excited, who knows, he just might cum in his pants!" Ikkaku guffawed, new tears appearing on the outer corners of his eyes.

"Yer right. And there's no way in hell I'd ever clean up _that_ mess." Grimmjow snickered as Ichigo's eyes flared. "Can I trust ya to control yerself Kurosaki?"

"Grimmjow!" Ichigo cried, his hand tightening around the handle of the bat as he lifted it above his head; however, just as he was about to swing, Chad's fingers curled around the top, holding it in place. "Chad!"

"No Ichigo." The giant said firmly; his hold on the bat refusing to slacken.

"Argh! Just one fucking hit! I'm tellin' ya! Just enough to make his fucking head bleed!"

"Ichigo!"

"For fuck's sake! Fine!" He snapped; relinquishing his hold on the bat and turning away from the two idiots who, once again, were laughing so hard tears were streaming down their cheeks. Really! It wasn't even that _funny_! "Fucking-. Gah!"

"Just ignore them."

"You have no idea how hard that is to _fucking do_! I'm going to kill them Chad. I am going to beat them senseless, once I get my hands on that bat! I swear it!"

"Soifon'll suspend you."

"Let her try! I'll just blackmail her with those pictures from last year's Christmas party! Ishida knows how to work that stupid bookface shit, he'll do it!"

"It's Facebook."

"Whatever!" Ichigo snarled, his hand coming up to massage his sore temples. "I need a drink. A nice, strong drink."

"You're gonna have to go to the bar, the others look busy." Chad inclined his head at the waiters and waitresses who were running around the maze of tables; delivering plates of food and drinks to the over-exuberant customers. Ichigo hissed in irritation. Freaking Saturdays! Next to Friday, it was the busiest day of the freaking week. It'd take him forever to flag down any of them, and Ichigo Kurosaki was not in the mood to wait forever. Nope. Not at all.

"You're right. Damn, what a pain. Why did Yamamoto have to design this place so crappily?" He grumbled as he stared longingly at the bar. Why was it so freaking far away? Another loud howl of laughter broke him from his thoughts; his eye subconsciously twitching as he attempted to ignore the two dumbasses still laughing behind him. On second thought… "Thank God Yamamoto built it like this. The farther I am from these two dumbshits, the better. I'll see ya in a few Chad."

"Wait, Ichigo." The young man turned around to regard his friend, his annoyed expression softening a tad. "Don't forget. The lunches are behind the bar and you've got thirty minutes."

Ichigo's eyes flared, his anger skyrocketing. "Yeah! Yeah! I know! Fucking shit!" He seethed, stomping away in agitation towards the bar. Just as he was passing the first full table (hell all the fucking tables were full); a door to his right opened, revealing a disgruntled looking Kensei, clothes askew and a cigarette hanging from his lips. "Again Muguruma?" He asked, slightly amused as he passed, forgetting about the others who were only a few feet away from them.

Kensei fixed him with a dark look, his hand coming up to take the cigarette away from his mouth. "You're one to talk Kurosaki; last time I checked they were still tryin' ta get that stain ya left outta the carpet."

Ichigo's mouth almost hit the floor as he stared in shock; his cheeks flaring a dark red as he tried to form coherent words, but only succeeded in stuttering like a fool. After a few moments of staring and mumbling unintelligible words, Ichigo grunted in frustration and spun on his heel, storming past Kensei and back towards the bar, his hands curled into fists at his sides.

"Oi! Where ya goin'?" Muguruma called after him.

"Bar!" He shouted back, not even bothering to slow down at all.

"What? Ya gonna drink? Alright then." Kensei shrugged, turning his back on the orange head as he made his way to the other bouncers. "Hey! Just don't get drunk aight! Last thing they need is another fucking stain, ya hear me Kurosaki?"

"Shut up Muguruma!" Ichigo yelled in anger as he neared the bar; the obnoxious laughter of Ikkaku and Grimmjow echoing in his ears. _Damn. Them. All. _He thought as he finally reached the designated area of interest, his bottom claiming an unoccupied stool as he sat down upon it. After a minute he was able to flag down Yumichika, who happily skipped towards him, his hair flouncing around his oval face.

"Yo~." He greeted, smiling at Ichigo in that mischievous way of his. "How's it goin' Ichi~? Beautiful night isn't it~?"

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Ichigo inquired, his right brow rising in question. The idiot seemed a lot more…lively today.

Yumichika gasped. "How rude! Nothing is wrong with me. I'm as beautiful as ever, can't you see?" He asked, his right hand coming up to flip his hair. Ichigo rolled his eyes, this man needed help. Really.

"Uh-huh." He replied in a bored tone, his eyes leaving Ayasegawa and landing on the many bottles of illegally imported sake behind him. Yup, everything they did in this damned joint was illegal.

"Not to mention that disgusting Ganju is out sick today, thank goodness." Yumichika continued, snapping Ichigo out of his thoughts. "His ugliness gets a little tiring to look at after awhile."

The bouncer rolled his eyes yet again. "I'm sure it does."

"Oh you have no idea. But anyway, what can I getcha?"

"Give me the strongest shit you got."

"Mmmm…strongest. Oh Hisagi~!" Yumichika turned away from him, his hand coming up to the side of his mouth as he called, well more like sang, for Shuhei. "Do we have anymore of that imported whiskey?"

"Yeah." Hisagi grunted as he passed a drink to a customer. "It's in the back."

"Alrighty~. I'll be right back then." Ayasegawa winked as he disappeared behind the double doors leading to the kitchen and the club's storage rooms. Ichigo rolled his eyes once again; how Ikkaku could stand just being around him (let alone living with him), he had no clue. Then again, he roomed with Renji, and what a nightmare _that_ was. Not that Renji was a bad roommate or anything like that, but the guy could snore…and snore…and snore, and it wasn't quiet snoring either. It was loud, obnoxious, nasal-like snoring. The kind of snoring that'd make you resort to banging your head against the wall, just so you could pass out and get some sort of sleep. Yeah, rooming with Renji was a bit of a…chore, to put it semi-nicely, but besides that it actually wasn't all that bad. Thanks to him and his double salary, plus the nightly tips he receives from his customers, on top of Ichigo's own paycheck, the two were able to live in a pretty nice apartment just a couple blocks from the business. Complete with a kitchen, dining room, living room, three bedrooms, two bathrooms and a den. Yup. It was nice…though the snoring, Ichigo could live without…definitely.

Just as he was mulling over the thought of Tatsuki's reaction to Renji's snoring, a shadow loomed over him, darkening the top of the neon green counter. Ichigo looked up, half-expecting Yumichika and his whiskey, but his hopes were dashed when his eyes landed on Rojuro, or Rose, who was studying him critically.

"What?" He asked, trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice. He never liked having people stare at him; it always put him on edge. Probably because everyone who stared at him was more or less gawking at his orange hair, something that he had naturally grown used to, but still, Rose's stares were always more than a little…unnerving.

"Something bothering you, Ichigo?" He asked then, his hands closing around a glass a customer shot his way. The strawberry just blinked as Rose pulled a couple bottles out of the cupboards beneath the counter, his eyes never leaving Ichigo's face as he artfully mixed the liquids into the empty glass.

"Nothing out of the ordinary." The bouncer answered in a bored tone, his eyes traveling once again to the bottles of sake lining the walls. "Ya still got the lunches?"

"Yup. There right here." Rose passed the customer his drink before stooping over to rummage around in the cupboards. A second later he popped back up, two bento boxes in his hands. "You going over right now?"

"Yeah, once Ayasegawa gets his ass back with my drink anyway."

"Mmm. He should be back soon, but you still got 'bout fifteen minutes. Just sit back and relax for now, you're going to need your rest for later."

Ichigo grunted. "Yeah, you're probably right."

"Oh I always am." Rose smiled just as Yumichika bounced back into the room.

"Ichigo~! You're in luck! This is our last bottle! Oh Hisagi~!" He sang, turning to the scarred man yet again. "Would you mind sending a text message to Iba? The storage room is looking positively hideous again, it's almost empty! It's his job to restock and I must say; his ugly ass is slacking quite a bit."

"Tch. You do it Ayasegawa. I'm busy."

"Ugh. Fine. Jeez, why did Yamamoto have to appoint a sour puss like you as the boss."

"Cause I know my shit. Now get back to work."

Yumichika snorted, his eyes rolling skyward. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Alright Ichigo, now whatd'ya want mixed in? Soda? We got-."

"No. No mixing. Straight is fine."

"St-Straight? Why would you want it straight? What! You don't like my mixed beverages? How rude! I'd like to have you know, they are beautiful works of art! Do you hear me? Beautiful! But an ugly male, such as yourself, could never understand nor begin to appreciate the work I put into making these exquisite drinks! I for one am appalled at-."

"Yumichika! Shut up! I don't care about your 'beautifully mixed beverages'! I need to be somewhere in ten fucking minutes and all I want is my fucking alcohol dammit!"

"Ten minutes?" The feathered man paused, looking utterly perplexed. "…Oooooh…I see." He smirked, eyeing Ichigo in that unnerving way of his. Hell everything he did was unnerving. "Well fine then. Don't need to get all ugly, I get it. Let me just get you a glass then and-."

"No." Ichigo snapped, holding his hand out impatiently. "Just give me the bottle."

"What? No glass? Are you sure?"

"Yes! Just give me the fucking bottle already!"

"Alright! Tch! Here you go!"

"Thanks."

"Your welcome, call me if you need something else."

Ichigo just grunted, his lips already around the mouth of the bottle as he tilted it upward, the strong liquid spilling down his throat and leaving a raw, yet pleasant burning sensation. Yumichika tsked in disgust as he turned away from the orange head, his attention now on another customer. Ichigo let his eyes travel around the club as he again brought the bottle to his lips, the drink already setting his limbs to tingling. Yup, this one bottle would definitely do, thanks to his skinny—but still rather muscular—stature; it didn't take much to get his brain buzzing, not to mention this whiskey was rather strong. He took another swig, the edges of his vision starting to fuzz and blur. His thoughts drifted as his eyes landed on the door behind the bar leading to that back room where _she_ was. Rukia. Rukia Kuchiki. That evil little midget had fucked him over big time, what with that public display and all. Had she no shame? Then again, she was a whore, and shame was one thing they had never been known to possess, at all. Oh yeah, she was fitting in fine, of that he was certain.

Angrily grasping the bottle, he tilted it up one last time, the last of the liquid entering his mouth and sliding down his throat. When he was sure his tongue had absorbed every last drop, he set the drink down on the counter, its glass bottom making a loud noise against the smooth surface of the top. Ichigo flexed his fingers, curling them into his palm and then extending them outward; to his satisfaction they felt slightly numb. Oh yeah, this one bottle would do just fine. Stuffing his hand into his pocket, Ichigo pulled out his wallet; one, two, three, four…five hundred bucks. Fuck. Didn't he have a ten somewhere? As he continued to check all the possible places, he noticed Tatsuki making her way over, her waitress uniform leaving none to the imagination. Embarrassed for looking, he turned away; his mind wondering whether or not the alcohol was a good idea, when a hand fell on his shoulder.

"Here, dumbass." Tatsuki grunted, shoving a ten dollar bill into his hand. "You can pay me back later." She said before he could open his mouth, waving her hand in the air casually as she walked away. Ichigo smiled before turning his attention to the folded up bill, placing it into Yumichika extended hand. Nodding his head to Rose, he collected himself before standing up; the orange haired youth was pretty good at holding in his alcohol, but anyone smart enough would know any sudden movements would render them on their ass. With this in mind, Ichigo stood up and stuffed his wallet back into his pocket before making his way behind the bar.

"Oi Ichigo!" He turned slowly; his eyes widening a bit, the flashing lights in the club were giving him a headache. The brown irises landed on Rose, who was holding two bento boxes out to him. "Don't want to forget these. Now hurry up, you got less than five minutes."

Ichigo grunted; taking the lunches from Rose before heading towards the doors. The next few seconds passed in a blur; one moment the lights of the club were flashing, blinding his poor retinas and the music pounded loudly in his ears, then before he could blink, he was standing in front of Ukitake, Kaien and Yoruichi. He gave a polite nod of his head in the direction of the older men before turning to the purple-haired woman behind the desk.

"Oh? You're here early Ichigo." Yoruichi commented, her mouth pulling into a smirk. "I take it you didn't want a repeat of yesterday."

Ichigo grunted again; his thoughts flashing to the events of the day before.

_"Strawberry! You're late! What? Are you trying to starve me? This is vigorous work and I need food dumbass! Next time your late…well you get it." The midget winked; her hand reaching out to firmly grasp his balls for emphasis before removing the box from his hands and walking back to the hot pink loveseat without even a thank you._

His eye twitched at the memory. The little slut; treating him like that in front of everyone else, she better watch her back. He took a deep breath; _relax, it'll be alright. Shirosaki's helping me out and that albino is flat out nuts, the midget will never see it coming. Yeah. Just wait, you'll get your chance. _"Haha. Funny, Yoruichi. I'm dying." He rolled his eyes before gesturing to the door.

"Don't be jealous Ichigo, not my fault she can take you on, even though she's like…two feet shorter than you. Anyway, yes they are on break; go in whenever your tiny, little heart desires." Her smirk widened as she surveyed a pile of paperwork on her desk, throwing her hand up towards the door.

Ichigo's eyes rolled yet again as he approached the door; his fingers barely grazed the knob before he practically jumped back, his head spinning in response. "Wait. Wait." He said; half to himself and half to Yoruichi. "Are they dressed?"

Yoruichi shrugged, a small smile grazing her lips. "More or less."

"Yoruichi." The smile widened.

"Alright. Alright. Keep your pants on." She replied, shoving her papers to the side and hitting a button on her phone.

"Yo lazies. Ya'll need to get some clothes on."

_"Ugh. Do we have to? Clothes are so constricting."_

"That may be true, but Ichigo's here and my ear drums are still injured from the last time he saw all of you naked."

_"Strawberry, you dumbass." _A new voice crackled over the intercom, replacing Rangiku's. "_Just come out already, we all know you're gay."_

Ichigo's brows twitched at the comment, while the other three occupants in the room succumbed to bouts of laughter; Yoruichi literally tumbled out of her seat, her arms wrapped around her stomach. "Whatever." He shrugged as he turned away, intent on tuning out their obnoxious laughter. When Yoruichi was sure she could breathe, she pulled herself back into her seat, the corners of her mouth twitching erratically.

"Alright. Alright. Stop with the insults, just change already."

_"Sure, no problem Yoruichi." _The vague voice answered, a hint of mischievous intent coloring her tone.

The bouncer rolled his eyes towards the ceiling as he shifted his weight back and forth between his feet. Two minutes had passed by before the door opened, revealing Nel in a corset that matched the color of her hair. His face instantly turned red; his eyes widening and then sweeping to the right, as though he were studying the painting behind Yoruichi intently.

"Hello Ichi. You can come in now." He nodded, his brown irises looking everywhere but at Nel as he walked in. Upon entering, Ichigo took a few moments to adjust to the dimly lit surroundings. Stark was in the middle of the room, occupying dozens of pillows, his snores louder than the music that filtered in. Ulquiorra was sitting in a corner, immersed in some kind of book that looked more like a dictionary. Harribel sat by Stark, her face displaying a bored expression as she flipped through the channels on the plasma TV. Chizuru was practically assaulting Orihime, who of course was completely oblivious to the fact, while Rangiku attempted to keep the young lesbian at bay. Ichigo looked around again, where was the damn midget…

"Lookin' for me?" A familiar voice asked; the sound coming from a dark corner, not too far away from Orihime and them. The strawberry tilted his head and squinted his eyes, trying to make out a shape in the darkness. Something moved and before he could register that it was even the midget, she stepped into the vague light that the disco ball hanging from the ceiling produced. Ichigo's mouth hit the floor, his eyes threatening to pop out as he surveyed the midget. It was the alcohol; it had to be the alcohol! How could the little whore look that damn good? Unintentionally, his eyes raked over her body; taking in her pale, smooth skin, her small but luscious bust, her flat stomach and finally her long, lean legs. Snapping his eyes shut, he shook his head, intent on getting the image out of his head. _Calm down Ichigo. It's just the alcohol. Yeah, just the alcohol. Shit! There's not enough room in these pants. Think of something, think of something. _An image of his dad in a speedo crossed his mind and he was relieved to feel his friend flaccid once again.

Rukia watched this whole internal exchange with a smirk on her face. Oh yeah, he liked it. Though she would deny it openly, the young woman was secretly happy that Ichigo found her sexy, she had no idea why, but she liked it. It felt good. "Are you done yet?" She asked impatiently; holding her hand out for her lunch.

"Huh? Waaaah…? Oh yeah. Here." He mumbled as he tossed her food to her, refusing to meet her eyes.

She caught it with ease and turned back to look at him, a smile on her face. "Ah, I'm guessing you were drinking, either that or your slurring is my imagination."

"Shut up Squirt." He hissed; instantly bracing himself for a kick, but surprisingly, none came. She was just staring at him, with an annoying smirk on her face.

"Whatever you say, _cum_quat." She replied, enunciating the last word in such a way even his buzzed brain could understand it. His eye twitched, yet again.

"Tch. Whatever." He grumbled as he turned around, ready to walk back out.

"Hey. Aren't you forgetting something?"

"What?" He asked irritably, turning back around to stare into her violet eyes. At least he thought they were violet; however in the vague light they looked almost black. It reminded him of the sky, when the sun was close to setting and the color of the atmosphere was a magnificent purple mixed with many other colors. He remembered when his family, back when his mom was alive, would have a small picnic at the local park, under that beautiful purple sky. The sparkles in the midget's eyes reminded him of the stars too, twinkling dimly yet brightly…

"Hey Berry, I'm talkin' to you." The sharpness of the midget's tone snapped him out of his thoughts. He blinked several times, his eyes meeting her perplexed face. "How much did you drink anyway, you look like you're about to freaking drool."

"Tch, none of your business. Now what do you want?" He snapped, glaring reproachfully at her. Rukia crossed her arms as she narrowed her eyes at him. _What the fuck was his problem?_

"Hey asshole. Watch your tone. I am a young woman and I will be treated respectfully."

Ichigo sneered. "You're a fucking whore, how can you be treat-." A loud yell and a well-placed kick to his shin cut him off.

"Asshole!" Rukia cried, grabbing the attention of the others in the room. "It doesn't matter if I'm a fucking whore. I demand to be treated with respect; do you honestly think I wanted this job?"

"Yeah. Well why else would y-." Another kick silence him yet again.

"You dick! You know absolutely nothing! How dare you judge me! You don't even know me you little piece of-."

"In case you haven't noticed, the only thing little here is you." He interrupted, his mouth pulling into a sneer.

"Tch, and your dick." She shot back; his anger skyrocketed.

"Bitch."

"Asshole!"

"Hey, hey you guys!" Orihime called, running up to the two, a worried look adorning her pale face. "Don't fight! Fighting isn't good for you! I mean, when I'm angry my stomach grumbles a lot and I get a really bad headache, it's kind of like when you're running and listening to music but all of a sudden a really old car passes by and the smell of the fumes is really bad so it gives you a headache and-."

"Orihime! Don't worry, they're not fighting. They're just discussing some things. Now get back over here so that I m-."

"Chizuru! Get away from Orihime!"

"But Matsumoto-chan." Chizuru protested as she threw her arms around Orihime.

"No buts! Move! Now!" The young woman grumbled as she moved away from the orange haired woman, her mouth pulled into an indignant pout. Rangiku rolled her eyes as she walked up to the small group. "Don't worry Orihime. Everything's alright. Ichigo will get in trouble if he hits Rukia, and I highly doubt he'd ever hit a girl in the first place."

"You sure?"

"Positive. Everything's fine. Right guys?" The two instantly nodded in response to the question and the dangerous expression that had come over Rangiku's face. "See. Now go back and finish your lunch."

"Okay. See you around Ichigo." Orihime smiled, waving to him before skipping back to the loveseat to finish her food.

Rangiku sighed. "Okay, I know you two don't like each other and all. But I really don't want to hear Stark complain about how he never gets any sleep, so make it quick."

"Yeah, whatever Rangiku." Ichigo scoffed, looking over to his right in disinterest.

"Hmph. So rude." She mumbled indignantly as she stalked away, back towards the hot pink loveseat. The orange haired young man just rolled his eyes before looking expectantly to Rukia.

"What? Don't act stupid, you know what I want." She replied to his expression; which, at the comment, instantly turned sour.

"No."

"You don't have a choice."

"Yes I do."

"No you do not."

"I'm not doing it."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are!"

"No I'm not!"

"Ye-!"

"WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP? I AM TRYING TO SLEEP!"

"Sorry…" Rukia whispered as Stark fell back onto his mountain of pillows, grumbling something about yelling idiots. Turning back to Ichigo, she waited expectantly. "Well?"

"No."

"Strawberry. Either do it now or I'm going to go out there and have Loly pop the CD of you moaning and cumming to my ministrations into the DJ booth and blasting the damn thing."

"You wouldn't."

"Try me."

Ichigo narrowed his eyes to slits as he stared at the evil midget. The evil, yet sexy, midget. The bitch. She was fucking with his mind! What she was asking for was suicide! Suicide! Only her sick, twisted mind could come up with such a, such a, thought. As he was contemplating this; Rukia was becoming more and more impatient. After a couple more seconds, she spoke up.

"Okay. You know what. You got ten seconds. Ten…nine…eight…seven…six…" She counted, growing increasingly more smug at the look on the strawberry's face. "Five…four…three…two…o-."

"Okay! Okay!" He snapped; securing his bento box underneath his arm. _Shit. Shit. Shit!_ He thought as he ran towards his destination. With a definitive slap to his rear, Ichigo bolted out of the room as fast as he could—surprising the three in the other room—Stark's loud yelp echoing behind him.

* * *

**Well long time no see. Lool. If you have time, could you please click that little button that says review, if not that's fine too. Saving the story to your alerts or favorites motivates me just as much as reviewing. Thanks guys. Until next time. :D**


	6. Payday

**A/N: I'm baaaaaaaaack~! I am so sorry about the updating so late, but this chapter is twice as long as my other one's so hopefully that makes up for it. I've just been really busy but I am going to try my very best to update at least once a week, it's been a rollercoaster with college and all but I'm finally settled in and gotten a rhythm on my homework so I'll be able to leave more time for writing this story. I do want to finish it, it's not something I want to abandon like all my other stories cause a lot of people like this. Including many of my friends so I'm going to do my best to finish it soon. **

**Also there are some lemons in this chapter, at the beginning and it's pretty graphic so be prepared. Also, it's not as descriptive as my other chapters, there is definitely a lot more dialogue but I felt that if I added more descriptions it would kind of take the humor out of what they are saying. If that makes any sense, I'm sorry, I've got a big weekend ahead of me and I'm so tired.**

**Anyway I hope you enjoy, this one is definitely long overdue. Thanks for all your support, I give you love!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach because if I did, all of the men would be chained to my walls in my closet...just saying.**

* * *

**Chapter Six: Payday**

Rukia released a guttural moan as she felt the nimble, experienced fingers of the man on top of her. They were currently teasing the skin around her entry, which was wet and slick from the moisture of her arousal. Luckily, the man above her was more inclined to dominate than be dominated, which in her opinion, was just damn fine, for at the moment she was too tired to even consider the thought of riding someone until they orgasmed. Usually she would put all her energy into what she did; one, because it was her job and any repercussions of her laziness or refusal would go directly to Byakuya, and he already had enough to do, of that she was certain. Secondly, any normal human being would admit that a girl barely over the age of twenty would still have ridiculously high hormonal instincts. And lastly; this gave her a distraction from the questionable images and thoughts that had poisoned her mind since she woke up.

She shivered involuntarily at the thought, before gasping aloud when the man's finger slipped into her wet core. Before she could even adjust, the man suddenly pulled out his finger, and then plunged it back in, creating a steady yet suffocating pace. Rukia continued to moan loudly, arching her back when the man's other hand grabbed her right breast roughly, his fingers artfully twisting and pulling on her reddening nipple. Her core started to grow numb, the tingling sensation increasing rapidly as the man continued to assault her dripping pussy.

"Ooooooh. You're a tight little whore, aren't ya?" He growled as he shoved another finger inside. She let out a small cry in answer, her eyes squeezing shut as she focused on his ministrations. Just as her body started to adjust, he pulled out, fingers glistening in the dim light of the room. A disapproving sigh left her mouth as he brought his fingers to her lips; she hesitated for a second, her eyes wide as she stared at the substance. She had never been the type of person that liked to…taste herself, per say; but unfortunately, according to her job description, she had no choice. So into her mouth they went.

As she began to lick and suck them dry; her mind wandered off, the images of her dreams plaguing her thoughts. For the last week, she had been having the same dream, over and over and over again. It wasn't even a good dream either, every single time she woke up feeling hot and numb, her throat dry and screaming for water. However, the part that frightened her the most; wasn't the recurring part, or even the waking up in cold sweats. It was the fact that, despite having it over and over again, she could never remember exactly what happened. Yet she knew, she knew it was the same one, no doubt about it.

The bed shifted as the man above her removed his fingers from her mouth and carefully adjusted himself atop her, the head of his little friend lightly probing the area around her entrance. She hissed in response, her thoughts disappearing as she felt him enter. She could feel her walls clench around him, but just as fast as he went in, he came back out before thrusting back into her. Clawing at the sheets on the bed, she cried out as he began to set a fast yet steady pace, the rhythm making the bed rock to and fro. Bringing his hand around, he began to stroke her lips as he continued to pound roughly into her. The room started to grow hot and the ceiling slowly blurred to nothing as he moved faster, her core practically numb as she felt the familiar sensation of a riding orgasm. She could feel he was ready as well as he sped up making her grimace; man she was gonna be sore later. As she neared her climax she thought of the one part of the dream she remembered:

_A man was standing in front of her; he was tall and fit with pale skin as white as paper and eyes as yellow as the sun. Her first instinct was to be afraid, but as he stood before her she felt a safe, familiar presence coming from him. He mumbled something, but it was so quiet she couldn't understand him. It was then that another man came into the room; his voice sounded familiar, yet foreign. It was rough, yet soft. Demanding, yet begging. Confident, yet unsure. The voice brought peace to her fast-beating heart, and she could feel herself grow considerably calmer. The second man then approached her—but he still stood in the shadows, just like the other—and offered her his hand. It was rough, calloused yet comforting. Slipping her hand into his, he pulled her up and closer to him before bending down, a barely audible whisper leaving his lips:_

"_I'll protect you."_

* * *

"Aye Rukia! Hurry it up! We can't be late!" Rangiku shouted through the closed door. Rukia grunted in response, her eyes looking around the messy room fervently.

"I can't find my dress!" She called back, her small hands pushing multiple articles of clothing out of the way. The large walk-in closet was a complete mess; thanks to Cirucci, who swore Grimmjow purposely threw her whip in there just to spite her. In a fit of anger she had turned the already cluttered room upside down; now all the garments littered the floor, pulled carelessly off the racks and large shelving. To Rukia's astonishment, pieces of fabric even hung from the ceiling, stuck on the many hooks adorning its smooth surface. Among the outfits tugged from the shelving units was the young woman's simple purple dress, which she had worn to work before changing into her uniform. Now it lay hidden amid the scattered remnants of shirts, pants, skirts, shorts and the occasional pair of revealing undergarments. She had been in there for the last ten minutes, trying to find it, but to no avail.

"Just forget about it! Come on!" The orange-haired woman yelled, her voice slightly muffled by the large wooden door.

The young woman stopped in a huff, her face portraying a look of annoyance. "Rangiku! It's my dress! I'm not showing up in just my underwear!"

"Why not? I don't see a problem with it; I do it all the time." Another voice—which was very similarly to that of the busty prostitute—teased her.

"Oh shut up Haineko! If you had your way you'd walk around naked, like you're doing right now. Go get some clothes on!"

"Do I have to? They're so constricting."

"Then buy a larger size!"

"Are you calling me fat?"

"That's exactly wh-!"

"Guys, guys!" A new voice cried out, the door opening to reveal a disgruntled Neliel, still in her turquoise corset and a troubled Orihime holding a Tupperware container filled with food. "We don't have time for arguments. We've got twenty-five minutes to get there and it at least takes thirty. Haineko, please go put on some clothes and-."

"Why should I?" Haineko huffed; her cheeks puffing out, giving her the comical look of a chipmunk.

"IF YOU DO NOT GET DRESSED THEN YOU WILL NOT GET YOUR PAYCHECK BECAUSE THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL I'D LET YOUR NAKED ASS INTO MY CAR! I DO NOT WANT TO BE PULLED OVER BY THE COPS AGAIN!" Rangiku shrieked, pointing at the untidy closet through the open doorway.

"Argh! Why do _you_ have to have the car!"

"Because I _save _my money, you spend all yours on pointless shit like breast implants."

"Guys…" Orihime started; her face red as she turned away from Nel's undressing form.

"EXCUSE ME! THESE ARE REAL!"

"Guys."

"YEAH SURE AND SO IS YAMAMOTO'S DICK!"

"_Guys!_"

"WHY YOU-!"

"GU-!" Nel screamed as she pulled her shirt down over her large breasts. She let out a yelp when a loud sound of glass breaking echoed throughout the room, the bottle of sake a few feet from where Haineko and Rangiku stood.

"COULD YOU ALL SHUT UP FOR AT LEAST FIVE FUCKING MINUTES!" Stark shouted so loudly the walls shook. "I AM TRYING TO SLEEP OVER HERE DAMMIT!"

"OH SHUT UP STARK!" Rangiku screeched in response, her face a deep maroon from her previous yelling match "AND NEXT TIME DON'T THROW THE DAMN SAKE, YORUICHI IS GONNA HAVE A FIT!"

"Stop it. All of you. You're behaving like children." A voice interrupted, they turned to see Harribel in her skimpy after-work clothes, her bag thrown carelessly over her shoulder. "Haineko put on some clothes. Inoue and Nel, go help Kuchiki, I'm sure we have something that could fit her and Matsumoto…stop yelling." She stated firmly, her eyes narrowing at the two sisters. Before any of them could open their mouths, the dark skinned prostitute turned to address the sleeping man on the floor. "Stark, get up. We have to go."

"I don't wanna…go…" He replied sleepily, drool oozing out of his mouth and onto the pillow he was hugging.

"Get up now or I'm dragging your ass out."

"Fine." He mumbled, his eyes opening slightly. "But you drive."

"Baka. Of course I'll drive, it's my fucking car. Now hurry it up, if you're not outside in five minutes, I'm leaving without you." She said as she walked out of the room, the others watching her retreating form.

"Wake me up in four minutes." Stark said aloud, before falling face first into his pillow.

Rangiku shook her head in amazement. "Honestly, I don't know how they do it."

"Do what?" Rukia called back absent mindedly. She picked up an article of clothing and unfolded it, staring at the garment in the dim light. _Is this a shirt…or a skirt…either way, too tight. _Throwing it behind her; she dived back into the large pile, her upper body disappearing into its bulk.

"Oh yeah! Clothes!" Orihime piped in, the arguing forgotten as she approached the closet, dragging a now fully clothed Neliel behind her.

Rangiku turned to her sister, who just stared defiantly back at her, her arms across her chest. After a few seconds the arms fell to her sides. "Fine." She grumbled before turning around and walking towards the direction of a door against the opposite wall. "You win. Sheesh. I can't have any fun."

"Ha. You don't regard your line of work as fun?"

"Oh I do, just not when it's some old man." She answered before disappearing behind the door.

Rangiku rolled her eyes before turning back to the closet where the others were still searching through the maze of fabrics. "Now what were we talking about again?"

"Tia and Coyote." Nel answered as she searched through a large pile of clothes sitting in the middle of the room.

"Tia and…OH! Right, right, right. So where was I? Oh yeah. I seriously didn't think they'd last this long." She mused, her index finger pressed to her lips in thought.

"They're together?" Rukia exclaimed, her head popping out on the other side of the large mass of garments she was rummaging through.

"That's what I said. Yeah, you wouldn't think, but they've been together for a while now…like…three years? Is that right Nel?"

"A little over three year's yes." Nel sighed in response as she tossed aside a piece of fabric. "It'll be three-in-a-half in May."

"Really? I thought they got together in June."

"No it's May. I'm pretty sure."

"Mmm. Now that I think about it, you're probably right. I mean I've never been good with dates anyway." Rangiku shrugged nonchalantly as she scanned the room. "Wow, May. That's not too far away; I mean the first of April's this Friday right?

"Yep!" Orihime smiled enthusiastically as she erupted from a large pile of clothes in the middle of the room, scaring Neliel in the process. "I can't wait for the first of April!"

"Why's that Orihime?" Rukia asked casually as she continued to look for a somewhat decent outfit among the mountains of clothes. She was so absorbed in her current activity that she almost didn't hear the other woman.

"Why cause the first is April Fool's Day, silly!" She giggled excitedly. "Tatsuki-chan and I have come up with the best pranks. It's going to be fun!"

The garment Rukia had been inspecting fell to the floor in a heap, her purple eyes snapping up to stare at Orihime in alarm. "Wow. You're right. Friday is April Fool's Day." She murmured thoughtfully as she sat back on her heels, staring off into space, her head tilting to the side in thought. "Hmmm…April Fool's Day…"

"Uh-oh. Lookin' a little evil there Rukia. Whatcha thinkin' bout?" Haineko called from the doorway, her body snug in a pink mini-skirt and matching tube top. She ignored her sister, who continued to eye her disapprovingly, her lips pursed in irritation.

"Oh, nothing important." The raven-haired prostitute said evenly as she discarded another garment behind her. "Hey Rangiku."

"Yeah?" The orange haired woman in question turned to her, her sister's heinous outfit completely forgotten.

"Are you good with pranks?"

"Ah, hell yes."

"Cool. Cause I got a couple of ideas and well…I'm not exactly in the…position to acquire certain…materials, as it were."

"Ha! Don't worry 'bout that, Haineko and I've got ya covered. Right?" She twirled around, flashing Haineko a devious smile. The older woman returned it, a small giggle making its way past her lips.

"Uh-huh. Totally, we got this. You thinking 'bout anyone in particular?"

"Mmmm, kind of." She replied slowly, her lips pulling into smirk. Sighing aloud she looked back down at the littered floor; the pile she had been picking through had reduced drastically in size. Gingerly she picked up another article of clothing and grimaced, way too revealing.

"Rukia-chan!" Orihime called from the other side of the room, a bluish colored garment in her hands. "I think this is your size, you might have to try it on though."

"Is it a dress?"

"No…not really…"

"What do you mean not really?"

"Well it's…I don't know what it is."

"Throw it over here and let's take a look." Rangiku called as she stepped inside; before the door closed completely, she stuck her head back into the main room. "That reminds me. STARK! WAKE UP! YA GOT THIRTY SECONDS!"

"YOU WORTHLESS WHORE, I TOLD YOU FOUR MINUTES!"

"FOUR MINUTES, FOUR-IN-A-HALF MINUTES, IT'S ALL THE FUCKING SAME! JUST SHUT UP AND GET OUT OF HERE!" She screamed back before slamming the door shut. "Fucking shit he's worse than Gin. Anyway, where's that dress? Ah, here it is." Leaning down, she plucked the garment out of Rukia's hands, ignoring the dumbfounded expression on the young woman's face. Unfolding it, the busty prostitute held it out for a better look. "Aw it's cute. I think it'd fit you."

"CUTE? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I CAN'T EVEN TELL HOW TO PUT IT ON! THERE ARE HOLES EVERYWHERE!" Rukia spluttered, almost choking on the words as they flew out of her mouth. She eyed the article of clothing as though it were an omen, and almost backed herself into a wall when Rangiku swung it around precariously from her index finger.

"Oh calm down. It's called style." The older woman laughed as she tossed the dress at her sister, who caught it easily, a smile on her face.

Scrutinizing every nook and cranny, the pink-wearing whore nodded her head in agreement. "It's not as revealing as I'd like it to be but it'll do."

"NOT AS REVEALING? ARE YOU BLIND? JUST LOOK AT IT! I MIGHT AS WELL GO NAKED!"

"That, I'm sure, a lot of people wouldn't mind." Haineko mused, winking at her busty counterpart before regarding the others, a serious look on her face. "However, Yoruichi would not be happy at all and the last thing I need today is another three hour lecture on how to conduct myself in a business setting."

"You have no idea how many she's been 'subjected' to." Rangiku whispered, trying to hide the smile creeping its way across her face.

Rukia growled as she rumpled the dress into a ball and threw it behind her, unaware that Nel caught it before it hit the floor. "I am _not_ wearing that. There must be something else here."

"There probably is but we don't have the time to look for it, we've got less than twenty minutes to get to headquarters. I'm sorry Rukia-chan, but you're going to have to wear it." Nel shrugged, holding the heinous garment towards the raven-haired woman.

"You're kidding." She hissed in return, making no move to take the bluish…thing from Neliel's grip.

"I wish I was." She commented back dryly as she flung the heinous garment back at the petite woman, who caught it gingerly between two fingers. "Now come on, we have to hurry."

"We'll be waiting in the car." Haineko called back as she walked outside, her sister hot on her heels, leaving Orihime and Nel to assist Rukia with the dress.

* * *

"EVERYBODY TAKE IT OFF!" Rangiku shrieked at the top of her lungs as she sang along to the music blaring from the speakers, her voice disappearing into the wind. The five girls were currently crammed into Rangiku's four-seat convertible, top down; with Rukia in the middle of course, Orihime and Nel on either side of her and Haineko in the front, riding shotgun.

"RANGIKU! WHAT IS THIS?" Rukia screamed, her voice barely heard over the obnoxiously loud music. The older woman's laugh was lost in the song as she cranked it louder, the flickering arrow in her dash the only hint to her activated blinker.

"IT'S KE$HA!"

"WHAT'S THAT?"

"NOT WHAT! WHO! SHE'S AN AMERICAN ARTIST!"

"SHE CAN'T SING!"

"YEAH SHE CAN! I FUCKING LOVE HER!"

"YOU LOVE ANYTHING WITH A PENIS!"

"HA! HA! YOU ARE SO FUNNY! BUT SHE DOES NOT HAVE A PENIS!"

"ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?"

"POSITIVE!" Rangiku shrieked back as she made a sharp turn, forcing the others in the backseat to slide into each other. "WOOOOOOOOOO!"

'THERE'S A PLACE I KNOW IF YOU'RE LOOKIN' FOR A SHOW, WHERE THEY GO HARDCORE AND THERE'S GLITTER ON THE FLOOR'

"IS SHE TALKING 'BOUT A STRIP CLUB?" Rukia cried out, moving Orihime's long flying hair out of her face as they scrambled back to their original positions.

"YEAH SHE IS!"

"RANGIKU ONLY YOU WOULD LIKE SOMETHING LIKE THIS!"

"HEY! WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?"

"WHAT DO YOU THINK?"

'THERE'S A PLACE I KNOW WHERE THE FREAKS ALL COME AROUND, IT'S A HOLE IN THE WALL, IT'S A DIRTY FREE FOR ALL!'

"HOW MUCH TIME DO WE HAVE LEFT?" Rangiku screamed, swerving right to avoid a drunk driver. Her sister squinted at the clock on the stereo display, the wind making her eyes water.

"TEN MINUTES!"

"SHIT! HANG ON TIGHT!" She shouted over the noise as her foot slammed on the gas pedal. Rukia's eyes widened as she watched the numbers on the electronic speedometer double.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! RANGIKU! ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY! YOU'RE GOING MORE THAN A HUNDRED MILES PER HOUR! WERE GONNA GET PULLED OVER!"

"HA! I HAVE NEVER GOTTEN A TICKET, EVER!"

"WHAT? BULLSHIT!"

"PSH! PLEASE! I'M TOO SEXY! EVERYTIME I GET PULLED OVER ALL I GOTTA DO IS ACT DUMB AND SQUEEZE MY BOOBS AND THEY'RE PUTTY IN MY HANDS! OH! AND MOST OF THEM REGULATE THE CLUB ANYWAY!"

"WHAT? NO WAY!"

"YES WAY! A FEW OF THEM ARE EVEN REGULARS TO THE BACK, PAY VERY WELL, YOU MIGHT GET ONE SOON!"

"NO THANK YOU!"

"HA! YOU DON'T HAVE A CHOICE BABE! NOW HOLD ON! IMMA GO FASTER!"

"!"

* * *

"Hey Renji! Hurry the fuck up." Ichigo growled from his place on the wall. He was still at the club, waiting for the stupid Pineapple to change back into his regular clothes. Another rumble came from his stomach and he grimaced in response, damn bitch was taking forever! "Come on! I'm hungry dammit."

A heavy sigh made its way back to him. "Shut up Strawberry. No one gives a shit."

"I'm sure you'll give a shit when I puke in your car. All I've had is beer." He mumbled, frowning down at his muscled belly in distaste. It wasn't his fault he'd had nothing to eat; they were so busy he didn't have time to order any food, and thanks to that stupid midget, the food he brought wasn't even edible.

"Well that's what you get for being a dumbass." The voice behind the door spoke, snapping the Carrot back to the present. "Wait, I thought you brought lunch today."

"I did." He muttered darkly, his eyes narrowing as he thought of what Kuchiki did to his poor lunch, and Yuzu packed it too. "The dumb bitch dropped it and spilled it all over the fucking place."

"Dumb bitch…? You mean Rukia?" Ichigo stared blatantly at the door as if it would talk back to him. "It was probably an accident."

He scoffed. "Accident my ass. The evil whore did it on purpose!"

"Tch, you're such a chick. Think everyone's out to fucking get you." Renji called through the door, his black belt making a subtle clink as he shoved it through the loops in his jeans.

"Not everyone! Just her!" The Strawberry barked, making the redhead's eyes roll skyward.

"Psh. Yeah. Sure. Whatever." He responded as he grabbed his shirt off the floor and pulled it over his head.

He heard an indistinguishable grunt and then a loud bang as the angry bouncer kicked the door again. "You've got five seconds to get your ass out here or I'm leaving without you!"

"Did you forget that we carpooled in _my_ car today dumbass?" The Pineapple rolled his eyes again as he went to retrieve his socks from the floor.

"Fuck…well hurry it up!" He shouted, stuffing his hands in his pockets he began to pace in front of the door, he knew the dumb whore was taking his damn sweet time.

"Hold on to your fucking g-string Carrot! I'm fucking coming!"

"Not fast enough."

"That's what she said."

Ichigo whirled around to find none other than Keigo standing behind him, his eyebrows raised and his lips pulled into a huge smile. "KEIGO I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!"

"Not if you can't catch me!" He sang as he skipped towards the exit, his grin widening when he turned to find his friend running after him.

"GET BACK HERE!" The Carrot hollered as he reached out to grab the waiter's shirt but missed, his hand grasping only air.

"Hey pansy. Are you done arguing with your wife yet, cause I'm ready to go." He turned to the door to find it open with Renji leaning against the frame.

He growled in anger. "Took you fucking long enough."

"Aw! Ichigo your no fun!" Keigo whined from his spot across the room as he jumped around lightly on his feet, ready to run at any given moment.

"SHUT UP!"

"KEIGO! I'M STARTING THE CAR!"

"Shit! See you guys in thirty! MIZUIRO WAIT UP!" Keigo cried as he grabbed his jacket before sprinting towards the door, his arms flailing as he screamed obscenities.

"Baka." Ichigo shook his head in annoyance as he listened to the sound of Mizuiro's engine fade into the distance. "So you rea-. Renji…? Renji! …FUCK!"

* * *

"Does she bother you that much?" Renji asked quietly, interrupting Ichigo's thoughts, the strawberry sent his friend a questioning glance.

"What?"

"Rukia. Does she bother you that much?"

"Yes." He grunted as he turned back to stare out the window into the night sky.

"Why?"

"Why?" He repeated, clearly surprised as he removed his hand from underneath his chin, the pineapple had to be kidding, it was completely obvious. "What do you mean why? The bitch is crazy."

"And? If you haven't noticed everyone you know is crazy. Just look at your father, Isshin is fucking nuts." Ichigo's brow twitched. "Honestly Ichigo there is no reason for you to be such an ass to her."

"Me? An _ass_? Is your tiny brain working properly? Did you forget what that little bitch did to me three weeks ago?" He almost shouted; his eyes wide as he stared at his roommate in disbelief. The dumbass had to be kidding.

The Pineapple huffed, sending the bouncer an unimpressed glance. "Ichigo that was three weeks ago."

"Yeah and guess-fucking-what? I'm still the laughing stock of the whole business!" He shouted, throwing his hands up in the air in frustration. Shaking his head he sighed, his gaze slipping from his friend to the empty soda bottle sitting in the drink holder.

"Well yeah…you didn't expect it to go away anytime soon did you? I mean Grimmjow, Ikkaku and Ganju as well as myself and some of the others will never let you live this down. I've never seen your dad so ecstatic before. I'm surprised he hasn't started calling her daughter."

Ichigo grunted. "Trust me, he has. If only…if only I knew what bugs her, then I could humiliate her myself." He muttered, his thoughts racing with possible ideas. Suddenly, a thought struck him and slowly, he sent a sideways glance at his companion.

"What?" Renji asked, a little taken aback by the smirk on his friend's face. "What?"

"Renji. You sly little bastard you."

"WHAT?" The redhead yelled; his brakes squealing as he slammed on them to prevent a possible car accident, there was no way he'd ruin his new, beautiful, red mustang. He glanced back at Ichigo, who continued to stare at him with his brows raised, Renji sucked in a quick breath in understanding. "Oh no. Do not even-."

"The bitch is your child hood friend isn't she? C'mon Renji! I need dirt on this girl! Dirt!" Flailing his arms about for emphasis, the Carrot-top ignored his pounding head as the car lurched forward.

The prostitute shook his head in dismay, his eyes switching between Ichigo and the road in front of him. "Fuck you! Don't you think if I give you dirt she'll know it's me? Have you seen her pissed off? Have you SEEN her PISSED off?"

The bouncer snorted, dismissing the comment with a wave of his hand. "Fuck that. So she'll be mad for a little bit, whatever, she'll get over it."

"Is your goal in life trying to get me killed?" The Pineapple exclaimed, his tone dripping with incredulity. Ichigo rolled his eyes in response; God Renji could be such a dramatic dumbass.

"If it makes you feel any better it's not my only goal." He replied snidely, the sentence earning him the middle finger.

He smirked as Renji muttered a barely audible: "You little smart ass."

"Come on! Just give me something, anything!" He tried again, sitting up eagerly when his friend suddenly grew quiet, his face twisted in obvious thought. A minute passed by before his mouth opened and then quickly closed again. He glanced back at Ichigo, a pained expression on his face, but the bouncer just nodded his head in encouragement.

"I-. She-." Renji whispered, pulling in a quick breath as he surveyed the road in front of him for pedestrians, looking everywhere but to the right.

"Yes?" Ichigo prompted, clearly impatient as he waited for the young man to spill his guts.

"Ah I can't! I can't!" Shaking his head frantically, the Pineapple slammed his foot on the gas. The vehicle took off, ignorant of the red light as it zoomed across a four-way intersection.

The bouncer resisted the urge to choke the hell out of his roommate. "RENJI! COME ON!"

"No! I can't man! I can't!" He shouted, eyes closed as his head continued to swivel right and left, his foot still pressed down on the gas.

"YOU DUMB BITCH, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!" The orange head hollered as he grabbed Renji by the shoulders and shook him mercilessly, trying to smack some sense back into the deranged whore. "YOU'RE LETTING HER WIN!"

"IF I TELL YOU ANYTHING SHE WILL FOREVER MAKE MY LIFE A LIVING HELL! A LIVING HELL!"

"SO WHAT? SHE'S LIKE TWO FEET SHORTER THAN YOU! MAYBE EVEN THREE! WHAT COULD SHE DO?"

"DID YOU FORGET THAT HER _BROTHER_ IS MY _BOSS_?"

"SO WHAT? IT'S NOT LIKE HE CAN TURN AROUND AND FIRE YOU ON THE SPOT!"

"HA! BEING FIRED IS THE LEAST OF MY WORRIES; IT'S MORE LIKE THE THOUGHT OF GETTING KILLED!"

"STOP BEING SO DRAMATIC AND JUST GIVE ME SOME SHIT MAN OR SO HELP ME I WILL CRASH THIS CAR!"

"YOU WOULDN'T!"

"TRY ME!" He shouted, throwing his left hand out to grab the sleek wheel.

"ICHIGO, YOU ASSHOLE! LET GO OF MY STEERING WHEEL!" Renji screamed, grabbing hold of the wheel as the vehicle started to swerve left to right while the two fought to gain control of the car. "LET GO!"

"EITHER SPILL YOUR GUTS OR KISS CONCRETE!" The Strawberry declared as he pulled down on the steering wheel, forcing the vehicle to make a sharp turn right. A girlish shriek echoed in his ears when they barely missed a large telephone pole, his breath hissing out as the redhead elbowed him square in the gut.

Renji desperately clawed at his friend's hand, trying to pry the bouncer's long fingers off the wheel. "NEVER!" He retaliated, pulling his arm back to land another blow to Ichigo's lower abdomen.

"FINE!" Ichigo shouted, effortlessly blocking the Pineapple's futile attempt to injure him; before quickly retaliating, the man beside him making a satisfying grunt in response. Before Renji could recuperate, he grabbed onto the wheel with both hands and in a swift motion turned it as fast as he could. The wheels squealed in agony as the car spun erratically, the trees and buildings outside the window blurring into one. Ichigo bit his lip, refusing to look up as he felt his empty stomach churn indignantly, the fast motion making him dizzy and nauseous.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! JUST LET GO OF THE FUCKING WHEEL!" Renji shrieked as he slammed his foot on the brake; the smell of burnt rubber setting his nostrils on fire. His orange haired roommate released the wheel without hesitation and in a matter of seconds; he once again had control of his car. A minute passed as the two took deep breaths, trying to calm their pounding hearts. Ichigo smirked as he stared out the windshield, willing his slightly present nausea to go away before glancing at this friend.

"Spill."

Renji sent him a dark look. "You are fucking crazy."

"Yeah, I know."

"You're paying for my tires."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now come on and spill."

He sighed. "Fine, what do you want to know?"

"She have a secret?"

The redhead rolled his eyes. "Yes, I'm sure she does."

"And…?"

"And I don't know, she's never told me a secret."

"What? You're her best friend!"

"Rukia likes to keep to herself, always did, always will. Just because you're her friend doesn't mean she'll willingly open up to you." He huffed, ignoring the Strawberry's intense gaze as he continued to watch the empty road before them.

"So you'd have to be more than just a friend."

"I am not sleeping with her, and neither are you."

"You honestly think I wanna get in her pants? Actually I wouldn't be surprised if her big secret was a penis. She does look kind of manly don't you think?"

"No. I don't think so. And for the record, she does not have a penis."

"How would you know?" Silence filled the car as Renji willed his cheeks not to turn red, Ichigo's eyes widened.

"WHAT? THAT'S HER? THAT'S THE CHILDHOOD FRIEND YOU SLEPT WITH? SHE WAS YOUR FIRST? BY GOD RENJI WHAT IN HOLY HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

"Nothing! It was five years ago okay, we liked each other so we pursued the relationship. Obviously it didn't work."

"OBVIOUSLY! A MAGIC EIGHT BALL COULD'VE PREDICTED THAT!"

"Will you shut up! This is none of your business anyway. We broke up because we valued our friendship over an intimate relationship, nothing more, nothing less. And anyway we've both moved on, I like Tatsuki and she likes…someone else."

"Who?"

"I don't know, she hasn't told me 'cause she's too embarrassed to talk about it, but it's a man if you really want to know. Honestly, it's not even that important-."

"Says the one who slept with the she-man. Who is it?"

"She is not a she-man and what part of I-don't-know do you not understand?"

"Renji. Either tell me or I will tell Rangiku about your little rendezvous."

"What? Rangiku can't keep a secret to save her life!"

"Exactly, that was the whole point."

"Ichigo, honest to God I don't know."

"And I don't believe you, now you've got ten seconds or I'm calling Rangiku."

"You wouldn't."

"I almost crashed your car. I think I would."

"Mother fucker!"

"I have never, nor will I ever, fuck your mother. Ten…"

"Ichigo this isn't funny!"

"Do I look like I'm laughing? Eight…"

"What happened to nine?"

"It died in an explosion. Six…"

"What if I give you something else?"

"Give me something else? Like what?"

"Well I-I may not know about her secrets but I am very aware of her obsessions..."

"Go on…"

"Okay so, how do I put this…?"

"What is this? A math equation? Just tell me what it is."

"Shut up and let me think."

"Oh man this is gonna take forever."

"Shut up!" The Strawberry rolled his eyes in response as he stared at the flashing colors zooming by the window. Renji cleared his throat and Ichigo turned to face him, waiting expectantly for the redhead to start. "Okay. You're familiar with the children's toy, Chappy…right?"

"Chappy? That retarded looking bunny?"

"I'm pretty sure it's a rabbit."

"Rabbit. Bunny. Same dumb shit. Wait she liked that thing?"

"Likes. Anyway, long story short. Ever since we were little, Rukia's been obsessed with rabbits. It's her favorite animal. She was constantly begging Byakuya to buy her one. Christmas, birthday, every present-giving holiday all she asked for was a rabbit. And God forbid she sees a pet store. I swear on my life she can smell those things, every single time we go shopping she somehow finds a pet store. To this day I'm pretty sure the mere sight of one sends a chill down Byakuya's spine."

"Byakuya? Afraid of a bunny?"

"He's not afraid. He's just…allergic."

"Bullshit. He's afraid."

"Okay fine, so the man's afraid of rabbits. Don't tell _anyone_ I told you that, okay? Anyway, so instead of buying Rukia a real rabbit, he went for the next best thing, which was a regular-sized stuffed Chappy doll. Over the years she's collected more and more Chappy items; pillowcases, Pez Dispensers, pencils, erasers, posters, t-shirts, anything and everything she could find that Taicho would allow inside the house, but she never showed as much love for those items as she did for her first doll."

"You're kidding."

"I wish I was." He smirked in response, his eyes growing distant as the memories flooded back to him. Ichigo waited impatiently for his friend to continue, his own irises rolling towards the ceiling as he stared at the vacant expression on Renji's face. "When we were younger she used to tell me she'd marry it, in fact she used to hold fake wedding ceremonies. I don't know how many times I was forced to be his 'best man'…now that I think of it she's actually still quite attached to him."

"Him?"

"Well yeah, she wouldn't marry a _she_, now would she?"

"How are we friends?"

"Beats me. But yeah, she still has it. Still loves it. Still sleeps with it. I think she even still puts it next to the front door when she leaves, so when she comes home it's there to greet her."

"WHOA! WAIT, WAIT, WAIT! SHE SLEEPS WITH IT?"

"You sick bastard! Get your mind out of the gutter! How tired are you? She doesn't _sleep_ with it. She sleeps with it like a little kid sleeps with a stuffed animal. Every night, curled up next to it, _fully clothed_. Ring a bell?"

"That's probably what she wants you to think."

"Oh yeah! You know, since she's a whore we gotta assume that she just physically fucks everything in sight! Objects, furniture, animals, STUFFED CHILDRENS' TOYS!"

"You never know. Extra practice. I wouldn't be surprised if Grimmjow did it…" He snickered as a thought of Grimmjow humping a giant stuffed bear crossed his mind.

"You are an ass."

"Least I don't look like one…"

"Fuck you." Renji muttered darkly, his eyes turning back to the road. The car was silent as he turned off the side street and onto the main one, the headquarters building looming in the distance. A telephonic beep sounded, the noise almost making him jump in his seat. "What are you doing?" He asked, eyes narrowing at the phone in Ichigo's hands.

"Calling."

"Who?"

"Rangiku."

"What? Don't tell anyone what I told you!"

"Calm your nonexistent tits, I'm not gonna tell her any of that."

"Good. Wait then what are you calling her for?"

"You'll see…"

"Ichigo…"

"Hey. Shut up Matsumoto, it is important. Its gossip, I think, don't girls like gossip? Okay, okay. You ready? What? Speaker phone? Yeah sure why not, go for it. Now? Okay. Guess who Renji's first was."

"ICHIGO, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

* * *

"WE'RE HERE! WE'RE HERE!" Rangiku shouted as the five girls burst through the double doors into the finance room, out of breath and sore from their sudden exertion of energy. The others in the room turned to them in irritation, exhausted expressions adorning their hollowed faces.

"Late again, Matsumoto?" Shuhei mused as he passed by them, four wide envelopes hanging limply from his right hand.

Rangiku stuck her tongue out in annoyance. "Bite me, Hisagi."

"Hmmmm. I think I'll pass." He smirked as he continued his beeline towards his squad, who looked tired and beat compared to their boss's unusual good mood.

The orange head raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Is Hisagi happy? Now that's weird, do you think he proposed yet?"

"No, I'm pretty sure he'd be singing and dancing if that happened. Nah, he probably got some in his office, just look at his dress shirt, his buttons are misaligned." Haineko yawned as she gestured at the left corner of the room, where Hitsugaya and the rest of Group Eleven stood waiting. "Now let's hurry it up, I wanna go home."

"Geeze. She's such a pain in the ass sometimes, ah well what can I do?" Rangiku muttered, arms folding across her chest in frustration. A grumble emitted from the person beside her, and the orange head turned in concern. "You okay Rukia?"

Rukia growled. "Never been better. Do you see Renji anywhere?"

"Renji? Ah yeah he's over there." The young woman pointed in the direction of the pineapple head, his flaming red hair making him easy to find. "What do you want Renji for?"

"Oh you know, just wanted to have a…friendly slap, I mean chat. I'll see you in a moment Rangiku." Rukia's eyes narrowed as she heard the deep laugh of the evil redhead, before Matsumoto could even respond, the young woman was striding over to Renji, a murderous look on her pale face. Rangiku watched in confusion before smiling in realization, oh was this going to be fun.

Rukia strode calmly across the floor, her insides boiling as she neared her best friend, scratch that, _ex-best friend_. She was going to tear him a new one, oh was she going to tear him a new one! _A nice kick in the balls will make him shut up about anything else embarrassing. Bastard I'll teach him, no one messes with a Kuchiki!_ "Renji!" The redhead turned at her irate shout and visibly paled as her steps doubled in speed, the eyes of the others around him widened in amusement as she approached, her left hand pulling a red finger-less glove with a skull logo out of her pocket and onto her right hand. "You complete asshole!" She hissed; her gloved hand whipping through empty air for a mere second before making contact with his cheek. The smack was loud and her knuckles burned as a grunt of pain pierced the silence in the room. "Renji, I don't know what possessed you to spill that kind of a secret but I swear if it happens again I will castrate you and that goes for you too, Kurosaki."

She turned away from the redhead to face the strawberry, who just smirked in response, his eyes alight in amusement. "Whatever you say, Kuchiki." He whispered hauntingly, a hint of a challenge woven through his carefully chosen words. Rukia hissed in anger, her mouth opening as if to say something, but the sentence died in her throat when a loud voice cut through the noise in the room.

"Attention!" The deep sound reverberated off the walls, silencing the large group of employees instantly. Rukia turned to see Yamamoto, in all his old man glory, scrutinizing the crowd before him. "I appreciate your service to this business in the past week; because of our newest employee we have gained many valuable customers and I expect you all to treat her with the utmost respect and care. Now if you can all go to your assigned places; your captains will hand out your paychecks and then you may do as you please, I will see you all on Wednesday. Good night."

"Alright shitheads! Line up!" Zaraki shouted as his burly figure approached the group of bouncers, white envelopes in his hand.

"We'll talk later." Rukia looked back at Ichigo; their eyes meeting for less than a second, but in that moment the two could feel something, like electricity shooting through the murky air between them, though neither could conclude if the feeling was bad…or good. Without another thought the raven-haired woman walked off towards her squad, her heart racing and her breathing shallow. There was something quite strange about that Strawberry, but she couldn't quite place her finger on it.

"Rukia-chan. Are you okay?" A voice cut through her thoughts and she looked up to find a concerned Neliel staring at her.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired I guess." She whispered, her eyes dropping to the floor in embarrassment.

"Well at least we'll be home soon." The green-haired woman smiled as she grabbed Rukia's empty hand. "Come on, Ukitake-taichou is probably waiting for us." The young woman stumbled as Nel dragged her through the maze of employees, her thoughts shifting to the look in his eyes. Those eyes were unreadable, giving her no clue as to his next moves, which worried her. He obviously had no shame or sense of secrecy; he was unpredictable and therefore dangerous. She bit her lip when a sudden urge to look back at him coursed through her body, the feeling and her curiosity easily overpowered her judgment and before she could talk herself out of it, Rukia turned her head for one last glance.

Her heart froze in her chest when she discovered the Carrot was still staring at her, his eyes so intense she felt as though he was looking right through her, into her very soul, causing chills to erupt down her spine. It had been so long since a man looked at her that way, and the intensity of it scared the literal shit out of her. Another shiver coursed through her body as she turned quickly away, her heart in her throat as she continued to follow Nel.

* * *

Ichigo's lip coiled in disgust as he willed the numerous feelings rushing through his body to go away. Just her eyes set his little friend to tingling, and if there was anything the Strawberry didn't like, it was feeling vulnerable. Vulnerable to feelings or vulnerable to physical damage; either way he compared vulnerability to weakness, and it bugged him to no end that she could set off his worst nightmare with a look. _A fucking look!_ He seethed, his fingers curling into a fist. Not to mention that sorry excuse for a piece of clothing wrapped around her body didn't help at all. What in hell was wrong with him? How could such a…such an obnoxious midget make him feel so…weak? _I'm just tired. _He concluded; his mind quickly expelling all thoughts of denial and refusal. "Fuck." He sighed, not realizing he was voicing his thoughts aloud. "I'm gonna have to call him back."

"Call who? Yer boyfriend?" Grimmjow mused from behind him, his blue eyebrows raised mischievously.

"Shut up, Grimmjow. I'm talking about Shirosaki." Ichigo's eyes narrowed in irritation; his right hand reaching subconsciously into his pocket where the rough pads of his fingers touched the cool surface of his phone.

Grimmjow stiffened, clearly uncomfortable. "Shirosaki; as in the guy who's as pale as Ulquiorra, crazy as Zaraki, and looks just like you?"

Ichigo smirked. "Yeah, that's the one."

"Ugh. That guy is a freak." The blueberry hissed through his teeth, his right hand shooting out to accept the white envelope Zaraki was impatiently holding out to him. "I can't believe ya still talk to him."

"Trust me, it's not like I have much of a choice." Ichigo grunted as he stuffed his own paycheck into his back pocket, his thoughts shifting to that of his pale twin-like member of the family. It wasn't until he was fifteen that the Strawberry was introduced to his cousin, Hichigo Shirosaki, who was the son of his dad's sister, well…dead sister. She died after giving birth to Hichigo from excessive blood loss or something along those lines and in a way he was viewed as an abomination by the people around him; especially his father, who blamed his wife's death solely on the young boy. It wasn't until he was about eight that his dad started to succumb to the negative effects of alcohol and in his intoxicated rage lashed out at his son. The physical beatings went on for years, until Hichigo turned seventeen. Sometime that year his dad vanished under mysterious circumstances and the police openly suspected the teenager, who fled from the law and supposedly resided in some kind of hide-out about five miles shy of Tokyo's Yakuza territory.

It was there, about three years ago, where Ichigo unintentionally found his long lost cousin, who was now a pretty high ranking mobster in the famous Yakuza family. He was driving to the club for his first day of work when he took a few wrong turns and found himself in the middle of an all-out brawl between his cousin and a couple of street thugs from the next gang over. Long story short, Ichigo was able to save the foolish thugs who jumped his cousin from Hichigo's psychotic wrath as well as save the insane mother fucker from the police who were about two blocks away from the whole scene. In return the pale young man offered his services to the Strawberry and his ever-changing cell number in case of emergencies. And though he'd never admit it aloud, the Carrot found getting revenge on the Kuchiki to be an emergency, one he knew Hichigo would be happy to assist in. "Unless you have a better idea for revenge against the midget." He added as an after-thought, sending a sideways glance at Grimmjow.

The man smiled wickedly. "Can it involve violence?"

Ichigo scowled. "No."

"Yeah, I got nothing." The Blueberry frowned, leaning back against the wall as he turned to Ikkaku. "What 'bout you Baldy?"

"Call me baldy one more time and I will knock your teeth out."

"Grow some hair and maybe I will."

"Bastard." Ikkaku growled before turning his attention to Ichigo. "Why don't you just do what she did to you, 'cept reverse it?"

"That's too predictable. I need to do something she won't see coming. Renji told me she likes that dumbass child's toy called Chappy but I have no idea how to get it." _The doll Chappy? Of all things? Well whatever floats her boat I guess, either way yer gonna have to figure out how yer going to get yer hands on it. We need her actual doll, the one she holds sentimental feelings for; a cheap store bought wannabe would do us no good, King. I can come up with the plan no sweat, but it's gonna be yer job to get the damned plushie, aight. I'm sure your devious mind can come up with something Ichi, we are after all related. _Were the exact words of the damn text message he received from his cousin in reply to the one he sent after telling Rangiku and whoever else was in the car about Renji and Rukia's little rendezvous. His jaw clenched when he thought of his "lil nickname' as Hichigo called it. King. Who the hell calls their own cousin King? Mobsters…he would never understand.

"Go buy one."

"You dumb fag, if it was that easy I wouldn't be asking your ugly ass for help. I need _her_ Chappy, the one she actually owns, not some fake piece of junk." Ichigo scowled, his right hand coming up to scratch the top of his head in thought. How he would get the stupid thing, he had no idea; it wasn't like he could just waltz into her place, look for it, and then take it. _If only_, he mused silently. Nothing would bother the evil midget more than to know he took it from her house without her knowing. He could just imagine the irritated look on her face and the worry in her eyes; those mysterious purple eyes that haunted his dreams and his nightmares. It had been awhile since he had a decent night of sleep, which ever since the orgasm incident, was near impossible. More times than he could count on both hands, he had suddenly awoken in a cold sweat to find the air around him too hot to breathe in. His mind racing as if trying to find an explanation for the recurring nightmare that tormented his daily thoughts. He shivered in spite of the warmth in the room, his eyes squeezing shut to force the fragments of the dream away.

"Ichigo, are you okay? You look ill." Chad said quietly, his hand light on Ichigo's shoulder. The Carrot stiffened.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just tired." He muttered, offering his friend a half-smile. "Thanks though."

"Hey ya fucking fruit, I have a plan for yer little…dilemma." Ichigo turned to see Kensei watching him from the corner, his paycheck in one hand and a lit cigarette in the other.

"Oh yeah, and what would that be Muguruma?"

"Do the unexpected."

"Well no shit."

"Shut up for a second and just listen to what I have to say. All ya gotta do is find a way to get into her house, find the bunny and then distract her so she doesn't notice you taking it. Honestly it's not that fucking hard."

"That's it? Easier said than done! She can't stand me! How the fuck would I get into her house?" The Strawberry scoffed as he shook his head in irritation, his thoughts on Muguruma's 'plan.' _How would I get into her house? _He thought as he rubbed his chin, the light stubble poking at the rough pad of his thumb. _Not to mention, distract her; and it has to be something unexpected, like he said, but she's sharp, she'll figure me out in a heartbeat if I'm not careful. So I need an unexpected yet discreet distraction. How the hell am I gonna do that? _Just as he began to mull over the many ideas racing through his mind, his eyes caught sight of the evil woman herself stomping her way back over to them.

* * *

Rukia moved the hair out of her eyes as she marched over to the two idiots in aggravation. About five minutes ago she had received a text message from Byakuya, telling her he'd be unable to take her back home due to a sudden large pile of paperwork that magically appeared on his desk. She had spent the last four minutes speculating over whether or not it would be a good idea to ask the pineapple for a ride home; and it was approximately, two minutes ago, that she concluded—unhappily—yes. "Hey fat whore! Guess what! You're taking me home."

"For your information I am not fat and for the last time Rukia I am a _prostitute_!" Renji enunciated, making both Ichigo and Rukia's eyes roll skyward. "And doesn't Taicho take you home?"

"He's busy; apparently you didn't finish your paperwork like you were supposed to!" She growled, clearly miffed as she repeatedly jabbed her finger into his chest.

"What are you talking about? I always finish my paperwork!"

"Then who's crap is on Nii-sama's desk?"

"I don't know! The only person who doesn't do their paperwork is Matsu-!"

"RANGIKU!" Rukia screeched, spinning around to address the older woman across the room. Ichigo covered his ears with his hands, the midget was nuts! It was five in the fucking morning for fuck's sake and here she was screaming! There was no way in hell he'd allow Renji to take her ass home, especially if she talked at that atrocious volume, for Heaven's sake.

"Sorry Rukia! I got so busy with my clients I totally forgot to finish and if Taicho found out I'd be in so much trouble! Anyway, gotta go, text me if you're bored! Bye~!" She yelled back, grabbing her sister and running out of the room before any of them could say anything.

The midget turned back to them in a huff, the strands of her hair shifting due to the slight draft in the room. "Either way, you're taking me home. When are we leaving?"

"Sorry Squirt, you can't ride with us." Ichigo grunted as he rubbed his forehead, the young woman's voice setting his teeth on edge.

"And why not?" She spat, hands placed carefully on her narrow hips.

"I'm pretty sure you're gonna need a ladder just to get into the damn car and I am too tired to go look for one."

"Ha. Ha. Ha. You think you're just so fucking funny don't you? Now you listen to me and you listen good pretty boy, I-."

"Will the two of you just shut up for five minutes please!" Renji interjected, moving from his spot on the wall to split up the quarreling duo. "Shit, you guys are like an old married couple, I mean for fuck's sake! Ichigo, it's my car therefore I will decide whom I am taking home and Rukia, you live in like the opposite direction, isn't there anyone else who could take you?"

"Do you see anyone else Renji? And besides, according to our little mishap from earlier, you owe me. Big time." She snarled as she crossed her arms over her chest defiantly, her eyes drilling holes into his very soul.

Taking a moment to glance around the emptying room, he sighed in defeat before turning back to her. "Fine."

"Fine?" Ichigo almost shouted as the midget's mouth curved into a satisfied smirk, her purple irises sliding to meet the Strawberry's in a fulfilled look that screamed: _I-told-you-so-dumbass! _"What do you mean fine?"

"I mean fine. What do you need a dictionary or something? Now come on. I'm tired, I need my sleep." Renji sighed again as he headed for the door, arms stretching above his head as he yawned widely.

"R-Renji wait!" The Carrot practically yelped as he stumbled after his friend, his large hand landing on the Pineapple's shoulder to steady himself. "A-Are you serious? You can't actually mean we're gonna give her a ride!"

An exhausted look adorned the young man's face as he turned back around to regard his friend in agitation. "Yes I do, we are going to give her a ride. What's wrong with you? It's just a ride home."

"Do you honestly think I am capable of remaining in her presence for more than ten minutes without choking the literal shit out of her?" He hissed, hands flying through the warm air as he gestured at the smug looking midget in the corner.

Another sigh left his roommate's lips as he glanced over at the young woman and then back to him. "It doesn't matter what I think because whether you like it or not, I am taking her home in my car. You're welcome to walk if you'd like."

The orange head's jaw almost hit the floor. "Our apartment is like…ten miles away!"

"Then you'd better hurry if you want to get there before seven." The young man shrugged, clearly indifferent to the bouncer's previous comment. He yawned again before turning, gesturing to the front door as he did so. "Either you come or you walk. What's it gonna be?"

Ichigo frowned as he glanced back at the smirking squirt behind them. "What if she yells?"

Renji stared at his friend blankly before spinning abruptly to face the raven-haired woman behind him. "You can come with us on one…no two conditions: no yelling and no fighting. Got it?"

"Fine, whatever." She shrugged as she nonchalantly took a couple of steps forward so that she was right next to them. "So…" She trailed off, continuing her somewhat hurried yet discreet pace. The Strawberry eyed her in irritation. What was she up to? "Who gets shotgun?"

"Now that," Renji declared; "is up for grabs."

Before Ichigo could even blink; the midget took off, practically flying out the double doors as she screamed: "EAT MY FUCKING DUST, PRETTY BOY!"

* * *

"Will the two of you just shut up, for the love of God!" Renji shouted his foot slamming on the brake so hard they screeched to a halt. The car behind them swerved into the next lane, its horn blaring as the driver shouted obscenities out his window. "YEAH? GO FUCK YOURSELF ASSHOLE!" Renji yelled back as he threw up his middle finger for emphasis before turning to regard the others in his car. "Now what are you two arguing about?"

"The dumb midget leaned back in her fucking seat!" Ichigo declared from the backseat, his limbs flailing about as he pulled his legs free and tried to find an, at least, semi-comfortable position in the cramped space. "If anything I need more room than short stuff here!"

"Well it's not my fault you didn't get shotgun! If anything you should've been able to run faster with those "longer" legs of yours!" Rukia retorted from the front, her eyes rolling upwards as she glanced at her red haired friend. "Honestly Renji, I didn't do shit, he's just upset cause he lost a race to me."

"Lose a race to you? Please, don't make me laugh. I'd be surprised if you're walking span covered two fucking inches. I could beat you in a race, any day."

"HA! BRING IT ON CARROT!"

"SHUT UP! BOTH OF YOU! FOR FUCK'S SAKE! We are about two miles from Rukia's house; can the two of you be quiet for two miles? PLEASE?" The Pineapple shouted, as he turned in his seat to face them, his eyes pleading.

Violet irises scanned the ceiling in annoyance. "Fine."

"Thank you!" He exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air in gratitude. Signaling, he took his foot off the break as he merged back into the lane, his big toe pressing down on the gas pedal making the car jerk into motion.

Rukia sighed, before turning snidely to the pineapple, a disgruntling smirk on her usually serene face. "God Renji, you're roommate is so anal."

"FUCK YOU!"

"EXCUSE ME? ASSHOLE, I AM A LADY AND I DEMAND TO BE TREATED AS SUCH!"

"YOU'RE NOT A LADY, YOU'RE A FUCKING WHORE!"

"TAKE THAT BACK YOU BAST-!"

"I AM GOING TO KILL YOU TWO!"

* * *

"Alright Rukia, we're here." Renji grunted as he shifted his car into park. The raven-haired young woman removed her seatbelt as she grabbed her bag, her free hand coming up to rub the early signs of sleep deprivation out of her eyes.

"Thanks Renji. See you on Wednesday." She muttered; unlocking the door and pushing it open with her foot. Thank God for three day weekends, Lord knows she needed the chance to rest like no other, if the burning sensation in-between her thighs wasn't enough of a clue. _Oh yeah; a nice, hot bath would be quite nice. _She thought as she approached her front door while her right hand retrieved the keys from her pocket, her fingers fumbling with them until she found the correct one. Inserting the key, she twisted the piece of metal before opening the door; throwing down her bag as she turned to give the boys a little wave before shutting it, the lock making a reassuring _click_ into place. "Home, sweet home." She breathed; her nose subconsciously inhaling the familiar scent of flowers and cucumbers. Ah, how she loved cucumbers. They were one of her few favorite foods, not to mention they smelled so good. Mmmm.

She licked her lips as she glanced around the neat and organized living room, which was rarely ever used but still as clean as a whistle. A double staircase stood diagonally in the far right corner, leading up to the second floor balcony and the four spacious bedrooms there; directly to the left of the staircase was a double door leading to her brother's office. The family room lay behind the door on the left far wall, while the door on the right of her, hid the kitchen and the dining room from the world. To most people, the building was a simple mansion for those with money and high regard, a symbol of nobility and capital; but to Rukia, it was simply home. A place to rest and relax; pretend and imagine; and enjoy solitude or company; it was a safe haven from the ugly world around her.

Eyeing the kitchen door, Rukia licked her lips once again as she took off her shoes and removed her jacket, her empty stomach growling in desperation. She smiled; _I might as well eat before I bathe. A nice, steaming hot bowl of ramen should suffice. _Placing her coat gingerly on the coat rack and her shoes underneath, the young woman was just about to head for the kitchen door when the doorbell rang. Her heart froze, _Nii-sama? No, it's too early, but who would it be this late at night? _She tiptoed back to the front door; standing on her toes so that she could see through the peephole. Her eyes narrowed as she unlocked the door and twisted the knob, the large piece of wood swinging open to reveal the Strawberry standing on her porch.

"What do you want?" She asked; her tone clearly irritated although the expression on her face was blank. She watched as he frowned and spared her a glance before settling his eyes behind her, his hazel irises scanning the room for God knows what. "What do you want?" She repeated, trying to keep her growing aggravation at bay.

Ichigo's frown deepened as he continued to—literally and figuratively—overlook the midget; his eyes continuing to scrutinize the room as he spoke._ Where the fuck is that stupid stuffed animal? _"I gotta pee."

"And?" Her indifferent tone made him glance back down, the annoying vacant expression still written on her face. She eyed him suspiciously, what the hell was he up to and why wouldn't he look at her?

"Can I use your bathroom?" He asked through gritted teeth, willing himself to look away from her purple orbs that seemed to look into his very soul. _Ichigo! Pull it together!__Maybe she keeps it in her bedroom? _He thought quickly as he tried to avert his attention from the Shorty to the plan he had made on his way home.

The raven haired young woman continued to stare at him blankly, her tone of voice revealing a hint of sarcasm. "You can't use yours?"

He sneered. "Our apartment is about a twenty to thirty minute drive away, I can't wait."

"Not my problem Strawberry." Rukia shrugged, the corners of her mouth pulling into a small smile, the action setting his teeth on edge. "Go pee in a bush if you have to." She added as she started to push the door closed.

Ichigo stuck his foot out before the petite woman could close it all the way; grabbing the door he pushed it open to where he could see her face. "Aye squirt, either you lemme use your bathroom or I pee and take a massive shit all over those white roses."

She stopped fighting his iron grip to scowl at him. "You wouldn't."

"Try me." He growled, pushing the door open further as he started to squeeze his body through the small open space. Letting go of the doorknob, she moved away from him, her eyes blazing in defiance as he entered the house.

"Go to the staircase and take a right." She spat, pointing towards the double staircase. He followed her pointed finger, all the while glancing around for that stupid Chappy doll. "Hurry it up Strawberry."

"Yeah, yeah." He muttered, waving his hands in dismissal as he approached the stairs and took a right, his eyes settling on a white door with purple designs etched into the wood.

"I mean it." She yelled just before he opened the door. Rolling his eyes he entered the small bathroom, which was immaculate compared to the guest one in his and Renji's flat. Unbuckling his belt, he unzipped his pants before relieving himself into the toilet, his thoughts on the task at hand. If the dumb stuffed animal was in her room, how the hell was he gonna get it? It's not like he could just walk up there, grab it and go, no Renji said she usually left it somewhere near the door so that when she returned from work it would be there to greet her, so it had to be somewhere in that room…but where?

Rukia continued to scowl at the bathroom door as she waited on the armrest of the closest white couch for the stupid Carrot to hurry up. Her features perked up when the continuous sound of streaming water stopped but then settled back down when it kicked up again. She grumbled something incoherent as she listened to the continuous sound of pissing; he sounded like a fountain…how much beer had he had? Her eyes rolled to the ceiling; men. After another moment the sound ceased and the loud noise of the toilet flushing echoed through the large room, she stood from her seat on the arm rest and folded her arms across her chest, her look of defiance returning.

Ichigo glanced at the mirror above the sink, letting his hand run through his orange mess of hair. He looked at the bags under his eyes and grimaced; he was exhausted. Moving in closer he eyed the small gash above his eyebrow, which he had received a couple days ago when an aggressive customer refused to leave and pulled out a couple of brass knuckles. It was healing, but man did it make his head throb. He looked at it one more time before turning to open the door and flick off the light, the piece of wood swung out to reveal a still scowling Rukia; he smirked in response.

"It took you long enough."

"Bite me midget, I had to pee." He shrugged, his eyes taking in every nook and cranny of the room. Where is that dumb stuffed animal…?

"Yeah I could tell." She replied, her eyes narrowing suspiciously at him. "Now if that's all you wanted, you can leave."

"Well I am hungry, wanna make me a sandwich?" He snickered as his eyes settled on the worn out Chappy doll sitting on the table right next to the door. _Bingo…_

"_Get. Out._" She hissed; stomping her way over to him as he headed for the front door. He chuckled as she opened the door, her hand gesturing at Renji's car parked at the curb. "Well?"

"Just one more thing." He whispered, stooping over until his mouth settled right next to her ear. She froze, his hot breath tickling the cold skin of her ear as his arm snaked around her small waist, bringing her so close she could feel the warmth radiating from his tall figure. His fingers traced a delicate pattern down her back, the corner of his mouth pulled into a smirk as he felt her shiver against him; the action sending a tingling sensation down to his best friend, who quivered a little despite the image of his dad and Urahara in Speedos plaguing his mind. He drew in a long breath as he eyed the stuffed bunny on the small white table, now all he had to do was reach out and grab it…

Stifling a moan Rukia bit her lip harder as his hand slowly descended down the length of her back, his touch leaving goose bumps along her spine. Too surprised to react, she stood completely still, painfully aware of the Strawberry's hot mouth at her neck. She almost jumped when she felt the burning wetness of his tongue as it glided across her icy skin. Knees slowly weakening, she forced herself to stay standing as his teeth began pulling at her neck playfully, the skin reddening against his tongue. She could feel him grinning against the hollow of her neck and almost lashed out in anger when he suddenly bit down, hard. A loud groan escaped from her lips as the Carrot soothed her stinging skin with his tongue. Her ears perked up at the sound of a whisper, her mind centering on the strong, husky voice of the man in front of her. "You aren't the only one capable of manipulation, midget. Though I must admit your instincts from your job do give you an advantage."

She shivered in response to his tone, her skin producing more goose bumps by the second. He smiled as his hand made contact with the bunny; the soft, worn fur clashing greatly against his rough, calloused palm. Slowly, he brought the small bunny behind him, his breath still tickling the outside of her ear. "You better prepare yourself Squirt, because this Friday will be the day of my retribution. The day I will finally have revenge for all the embarrassment you caused me, and I'm warning you now…Kuchiki. You will regret making fun of me. Until Wednesday then." He whispered and before she could even blink he was out the door, the large piece of wood slowly shutting on his retreating figure.

Rukia unintentionally stepped back, her right hand reaching out behind her until it found the chair she had been feeling for. Still staring at the door, she gradually lowered herself into it, letting out a long breath she hadn't known she'd been holding. Her hand crept up to feel the swollen skin at her neck and she winced at the slight sting it produced. The Strawberry had balls…who knew? Sitting up straight, she gathered her nerves, willing herself to stop shivering as she reached for the phone in her bag. Silently, she dialed a number before placing the electronic device next to her ear. She waited a moment until the ringing stopped and a small, exasperated voice answered.

"Hey Rangiku, it's me. Sorry to bother you but…I wanted to know if you, by chance, have that retired general's number. I have an idea."

* * *

**That is the end. Dun, dun, dun, duuuuuuuun! I'm actually really excited about writing their pranks, I can promise it's not going to be something you will expect. Muahahahahahaha. Anyway I hope you enjoyed it, if you want and have the time, feel free to leave a review and if not, I still thank you for reading this. Lots of love!**

**P.S. I have my Tumblr link in my profile in case you want to follow or hound me for not updating in a timely manner. Lol. I know I would. xD**


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